DOLPHINS: THEY HAVE NAMES, THEY HOLD HANDS
And those are just the boys.
SURVEY: ONE IN TEN WILL CHECK PHONE DURING SEX
Textus interruptus.
THE LOCKDOWN SONG, FOR KINDERGARTENERS
Everybody sing!
AUDIO: SMART PEOPLE WEAR GLASSES
Maybe. Possibly.
AMERICA’S DREAM HOME
Beach house. No neighbors.
SECOND GRADER: “I HATE MY MOM’S PHONE”
Pay attention to meeee.
AMERICANS FEAR WHAT’S IN THEIR HOT DOGS
Don’t tell us what’s in it.
ENTENMANN’S SEEKS CHIEF DONUT OFFICER
Good: Donuts. Bad: Entenmann’s.
THE MOST SELF-OBSESSED MOTHER’S DAY ARTICLE YOU’LL READ TODAY
Mother’s Day. Because it’s all about you.
TEXTING DON’TS
Ix-nay on the eggplant emoji.