ALLIGATOR KNOCKS ON MAN'S DOOR IN MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT

In Lutz, Florida, a man said he heard a strange scratching noise in the middle of the night at the door of his home Thursday. He opened it to find a 9 1/2-foot alligator crawling around. The homeowner called a trapper to wrangle the bull gator. The wrangler got the animal under control using two ropes and a roll of tape.
* Alligators scratching at your door. Sleep tight, Mr, Florida Man.
* The alligator said he needed gas money to get home to Ocala, just a couple of bucks. That old scam.
* What if it was just some really late trick or treaters in an excellent costume?
* Florida: where every day is the “Land Shark” sketch from Saturday Night Live.
* Then while the alligator distracted him, the Burmese python snuck in the back door and robbed him.
* That’s not a state down there. That’s a wildlife safari.
* No wonder Jeb Bush wants to go to Washington. Who wouldn’t want to get out of there?
* Two ropes and a roll of tape to trap a 9 and 1 half alligator?
Okay, but I’d also bring a machine gun.