AUDIO: MAN'S LIFE SAVED BY HOT POCKETS
Jason Bartley’s life was saved by Hot Pockets. Bartley lived in the apartment that was destroyed in the Akron, Ohio small plane crash that killed nine people Tuesday. Precisely 39 minutes before the crash, he had been in the apartment when he realized he wanted to get to the bank before it closed and run some other errands. He stopped first at the bank, and then at the Giant Eagle supermarket next door. Hustling to get home, he noted the time on his car radio: 2:45. Bartley decided to stop at Dollar General for that night’s dinner and the next morning’s breakfast. He bought a Hot Pocket and a Pizza Hot Pocket. As he was driving back to his apartment, he saw the smoke and flames. When he saw that his apartment was the one ablaze, he immediately thought: “Oh, my God. What did I do?” thinking he had caused the fire. A bystander told him about the plane. Bartley has been going through the ultimate in dueling emotions: heartbroken at losing almost everything he owned – treasured books, personal photos and gifts from his family – but ecstatic to still have his most important possession, his Hot Pockets. No, not really. He’s thankful for his life.
* Fine, you still have your life. But you won’t have it much longer if you don’t start making better nutritional choices.
* I also find it troubling that your first reaction was to blame yourself.
* He lost everything, but on the bright side, by getting the Hot Pockets at the Dollar General instead of the Giant Eagle supermarket, he saved 21 cents.
* This is weird: I tried to watch the plane crash video on YouTube, but first I had to sit through a commercial for Hot Pockets.
* God works in mysterious ways. And sometimes in delicious ways.
* So I guess they’re arguing that eating Hot Pockets is a wise thing to do.
* Don’t bother. You had me at “Pizza Hot Pocket.”
* In fact I can put it in a few words: The takeaway here is eat more takeout.
CLIP: The Hot Pockets jingle.
