FLORIDA SENATE CANDIDATE KILLED A GOAT, DRANK ITS BLOOD

Two years ago, Augustus Sol Invictus walked from central Florida to California’s Mojave Desert and spent a week fasting and praying, at times thinking he wouldn’t survive. In a pagan ritual to give thanks when he returned home, he killed a goat and drank its blood. Now Augustus Sol is a Libertarian candidate for U.S. Senate, and the story is coming back to bite him in the butt. (* or, to further the goat metaphor, butt him in the butt). The chairman of the Libertarian Party of Florida, Adrian Wyllie, says not only has Invictus drank the blood of a goat, but also wants to lead a civil war, and is trying to recruit neo-Nazis to the party. Says Wyllie, “We must explain to people this is the opposite of Libertarians. This guy has no place in the Libertarian Party.” Invictus, a 32-year-old lawyer who changed his given name — which he declines to reveal — to a Latin phrase that means “majestic unconquered sun,” says Wyllie is just running a smear campaign. He says he isn’t trying to start a civil war, but he says the government already is at war with its citizens and that it’s certain to escalate. “The only question is when are the citizens going to start fighting back?” he said. “I don’t think I’m the only person who sees a cataclysm coming, but I think I’m the only person saying it, and I think that scares people.” As for the goat:
“I did sacrifice a goat. I know that’s probably a quibble in the mind of most Americans,” he said. “I sacrificed an animal to the god of the wilderness … Yes, I drank the goat’s blood.”
* Still better than Trump.
* Baaa-a-a-a-ad idea.
* Wasn’t killing a got and drinking its blood a requirement for the Geroge W. Bush administration?
* He drank the blood of a goat. Your move, Putin.
* If elected, will he try to change the Pentagon into a Pentagram?
* You idiot. You only drink the blood of the goat the year after an eclipse.
* Although it sounds like you had your own little eclipse a long time ago.
* And the goat isn’t for the god of the wilderness. That’s a deer’s blood. You drink the goat blood to honor the god of the farm.
* But you already knew that, didn’t you?