NEW TREND: MEWING

There’s a new trend happening among our obnoxious children. It’s called “mewing.” Actual mewing is a technique created by the Mew brothers, Mike and John Mew, who are British orthodontists. When you’re not talking, you press your tongue against the roof of your mouth. It’s supposed to make your jaw line more square. If you do that – right now, go ahead and press your tongue against the roof of your mouth – you’ll find that it also keeps your mouth closed.
Well…. those slack-jawed yokel kids of yours have adapted the technique into a rude gesture. When you’re talking to the kid, they’ll close their mouth, make a”shush” gesture with their finger in front of their lips, and then point to their jaw as if they were ‘mewing’ and can’t respond to you. The effect is, “I don’t care what you have to say.”
The problem is, kids are now doing the gesture in the classroom. When a teacher asks them a question or tries to tell them something, the kid will mew at them to silently indicate that they’re “unavailable” to listen because they are mewing. Teachers are finding it disrespectful and frustrating and don’t know how to respond. It’s as if to say, “Hush, now is not the time be telling me something, I’m improving my jawline.”
* “How’d you like me to improve your buttline with my foot, you little snot?”
* Gee, back in the day, if kids wanted to be disrespectful when you asked them a question, they’d plank.
* Still, I guess I’d rather have them mew at me than twerk at me.
* Hello, teachers? It’s called ‘go stand in the hallway’ or ‘go sit in the back of the room’ or ‘let’s call your mom.’