800-POUND MAN KICKED OUT OF HOSPITAL FOR ORDERING PIZZA

In Rhode Island, an 800-pound man was kicked out of a hospital weight loss program for ordering pizza. Now, Steven Assanti, 33, says he has nowhere to go. He rides in the back of an SUV while his father drives the roads of Rhode Island, looking for someone who can help. Assanti says he has an eating addiction. For the past 80 days, Assanti was getting the help he needed in a Rhode Island hospital where he lost 20 pounds. Once he got down to 550, he could have a gastric bypass. But ordering pizza violated the care plan, and the hospital told him he had to leave. Assanti’s father says taking his son home will be a death sentence, because he’ll just fall back into the habits of lying in bed and eating. So the two men say they will continue to drive around until they can find a place to help.
* It’s not my place to say it, but how about WALKING the roads of Rhode Island?
* It’s like The Flying Dutchman, if the Dutchman was a hungry fat guy.
* An 800-pound guy being driven around in the back of a van. I always pictured this was how Shaggy from Scooby-Doo would end up.
* This’ll be fine until the SUV needs a new suspension. Then what?
* Winter’s coming. Who’s going to help when Dad and Tubby are stuck in the snow?
* “We’re gonna need a bigger tow truck.”
* He has no place to go? How about McDonald’s?
* The father says if the son went home, he’d just fall back into the habits of lying in bed and eating. Hey, Brainiac – LOCK HIM IN THE BEDROOM FOR EIGHT MONTHS AND PASS UNBUTTERED TOAST UNDER THE DOOR.
* For him, eating a pizza must be like eating a Ritz cracker for a regular person.
* 800 pounds. And even then he’s probably lying a little about his weight.
* God knows I do.
* Wouldn’t you start getting help when you hit 500 pounds? I mean, come on, people. We need a little cooperation here.