WEDNESDAY, Mar 19 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR WEDNESDAY, March 19, 2025
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: A & M AUTOLAND – Moonlight Madness

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing – including “holidays” created by the National Day Calendar and Wellcat websites to drive traffic to their websites – or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

CERTIFIED NURSES DAY

NATIONAL CHOCOLATE CARAMEL DAY

NATIONAL POULTRY DAY
The Holidays Calendar website says this:
“Some people say that National Poultry Day started as a humble event observed in the town of Versailles, Ohio, in the early 1950s. This festival took place over a two-day period and allowed chicken farmers to showcase their poultry. Over time, the festival grew until thousands of people were showing up for the event every year. Now, small towns all over the U.S. have their own National Poultry Day celebrations, and it’s even being celebrated in other countries as well.”

March is:

Adopt a Rescued Guinea Pig Month
American Red Cross Month
Employee Spirit Month
Expanding Girls’ Horizons in Science and Engineering Month
Gender Equality Month
Irish-American Heritage Month
National Craft Month
National Women Inventors Month
National Women’s History Month
Read an E-Book Month

THE BUZZTV SHOWS MY PARENTS WOULDN’T LET ME WATCH

Reddit asked, “What tv show did your parents forbid you to watch growing up?” Some of the responses:
– “Pretty much everything on MTV. They wanted to shield me from that filth.”
– “Caillou. Honestly, good move mom. Her words were ‘We ain’t having any whiny bitches around here.'”
– “The Simpsons, and now watching it as an adult I really don’t get it. It was overall very wholesome and the adult jokes went over our heads.”
– “Sam And Cat. My mom thought Ariana Grande’s voice was so annoying.”
– “Power Rangers – demons. Pokemon – little demons. Harry Potter – witches and demons.”
– “The Three Stooges. They were afraid I’d go all Moe on my little sister when they weren’t looking. (and I did!)”
– “In Living Color…but I loved it and would secretly sneak and watch anytime I was at a cousins house.”
– “All daytime soap operas. We are a theater family and my father couldn’t stomach the awful acting.”
– “Friends because it had too much sex. CSI and all its murder was apparently fine though.”
– “My grandmother forbade me from watching men’s ice skating because it would make me gay. (I’m a lady)”
* PHONE TOPIC: What TV show did your parents ban you from watching?

U.S. NEWS

MAN SHOOTS GUN BECAUSE KARAOKE MACHINE WAS BROKEN

A Florida man in a bar waved a gun around and fired off a round because the karaoke machine was not working. Police in Clearwater allege that Aaron Jablonski, 34, was at the Overtime Sports Bar around 2:30 AM Saturday when the ‘brokie karaoke’ resulted in him exiting the bar in an agitated state. Mr. Jablonski allegedly pulled a handgun from his waistband and pointed it at a man who was trying to calm him down. Jablonski was arrested for aggravated assault and felon in possession of a firearm.
* And now he’s going to Sing-Sing! (sometimes the jokes write themselves.)
* What’s weird is, the song he wanted to sing was The Eagles’ “Peaceful Easy Feeling.”
* Now he’s singing “Jailhouse Rock.”
* Folks, next time the karaoke machine’s not working, just SAY the word “Shoot!”
* Sometimes talent just has to come out, it cannot be contained.

WOMAN CRASHES INTO HOUSE, ASKS TO USE THE BATHROOM

A silver four-door sedan plowed through a front yard and then slammed into the side of a home in the Florence-Firestone area of Los Angeles late Sunday night. Besides leaving a gaping hole in the wall, the crash caused a small gas leak, requiring the homeowner to find another place to spend the night. As police and emergency crews were responding to the crash, the driver, a woman, asked the homeowner if she could use the bathroom. The homeowner said yes. The handcuffs were removed while she was escorted into the home. Afterwards, she was re-cuffed and taken away. It was unclear if drugs or alcohol might have been a factor.
* First door on the right, just past the car hood and all the debris.
* Handcuffs? What was the charge? Not staying in her lane? Remodeling without a contractor’s license?
* “My, you have such a lovely home. Well, HAD such a lovely home.”
* A four-door sedan? I was expecting a Dodge Ram.
* There’s a place in heaven for that homeowner. Talk about turning the other cheek.

WEST VIRGINIA BANNING ALL THE GOOD FOOD

The state of West Virginia — which leads the nation in chronic diseases — is preparing to sign America’s ‘strongest’ ban on cancer-linked toxic food ingredients. All they need is for the governor to sign the bill which will ban nine dyes and additives from schools and, later, across the state. The additives have all been linked to behavioral issues and reproductive damage. If signed into law, it will ban the sale of products containing Red 3, Red 40, Yellow 5, Yellow 6, Blue 1, Blue 2, Green 3, butylated hydroxyanisole, and propylparaben. In case you were wondering:
– Red #40 and Red #3 are in snacks, candies and sodas, like Doritos, Skittles, and Pepsi – as well as baked goods and cake mix. Red #3, shown to cause cancer at high doses in lab rats, was banned nationwide by the FDA in January – the ban in foods takes effect in January, 2027.
– Yellow #5, found in Doritos, juices, cookies and pickles, has been linked to potential triggers for hyperactivity in children and potential DNA damage.
– Yellow #6 is found in sugary breakfast cereals such as Lucky Charms and Cap’N Crunch.
– Blue #1, commonly found in gummy bears, can cause hyperactivity and inattention in children.
– Blue #2, common in sports drinks, and Green #3, found in canned vegetables and salad dressings – are both found to cause increased tumor growth in animals.
– Butylated hydroxyanisole (BHA) and propylparaben are found in many foods including butter, beer, vegetable oils, potato chips and cured meats like ham.
* What’s left? Moonshine?
* Why does it skip from Red #3 right to Red #40? All the reds in between were EVEN WORSE.
* Problem is, if you take out Red #3 and Blue #1 and Yellow #6, everything tastes like number 2.
* If you think drug smuggling is bad, wait’ll 1.8 million West Virginians wake up to no Doritos, Skittles or Lucky Charms.
* Well, West Virginia, as I like to say: more for the rest of us.

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

AUSTRALIAN WOMAN TRIED TO SELL DOG-BARFED HUMAN TOES

An Australian woman admitted planning to sell two human toes on the black market. The toes had been regurgitated by dogs at an animal shelter. Two dogs had eaten parts of their owner’s body after he died of natural causes. The dogs threw up human remains while at an animal shelter in 2024. The woman, Joanna Kinman, 48, who worked at the shelter, retrieved the toes from a trash can, put them in a jar of formaldehyde, and told a friend that she could make a few hundred dollars by selling them. An anonymous tip alerted police to Kinman’s plans. On Monday, Kinman pleaded guilty to offensive conduct involving human remains. The judge called her actions “astounding” and “entirely odd.” She was given probation and 150 hours of community service.
* Come on, it’s Australia. This is not “entirely” odd for Australia.
* A couple hundred dollars? Please! Barfed up human toes in formaldehyde don’t get more than thirty bucks on eBay.
* It’s obvious the friend she told is the one who fingered her. Or toed her.
* In America, we play “Uncle’s got your nose!” In Australia, they play “Dingo’s got your toes.”
* After years of care and love, your faithful dog eats you when you die. I think poor Gene Hackman got off easy.

TRENDING

THE TOP 10 MOST POPULAR DOGS IN THE US

According to American Kennel Club, here are the current most popular dog breeds in America:
1. For the third year in a row, the French bulldog
2. Labrador retriever
3. Golden retriever
4. German shepherd
5. Poodle
6. Dachshund
7. Beagle
8. Rottweiler
9. Bulldog
10. German shorthaired pointer

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

TOMORROW – Spring begins, Spring Equinox is 5:01 a.m. EDT
April 1, Tuesday – April Fools Day
April 15, Tuesday – U.S. Tax Day
May 11, Sunday – Mother’s Day
May 26, Monday – Memorial Day

BIRTHDAYS

Bruce Willis (retired actor, stricken with aphasia and frontotemporal dementia) … 70
Harvey Weinstein (disgraced film producer) … 72
Glenn Close (actress, “Hillbilly Elegy,” “Guardians of the Galaxy,” “101 Dalmatians,” “Fatal Attraction”) … 78
Ursula Andress (actress, first ‘Bond Girl’ in “Dr. No”) … 89

Today’s Birthdays grade: The first ‘Bond girl’ from way-y-y back in 1962, a longstanding top-level actress, and a blockbuster actor who helped define the “action hero.” It’s also Harvey Weinstein’s birthday, but we’re ignoring him. Grade: B.

[Want to try something different with the daily birthdays? Try grading them! Some days have “good” celebs, some have “great” celebs, some have “lousy” celebs. For fun, give the group an arbitrary grade: A-plus through F-minus. Sidekick will give you our take on it; you can to take the concept and run with it.]

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“I’ve given up on trying to explain myself, or trying to set the record straight, or trying to get people to understand what I’m really like as a man … outside of my job.”

(A) Joaquin Phoenix
(B) Shia LaBeouf
(C) Bruce Willis

ANSWER: (C) Bruce Willis

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2012 – Wendy’s overtook Burger King to become the second best-selling hamburger chain.
* Burger King? Make that Burger Duke.

2003 – President George W. Bush ordered the start of the war on Iraq, declaring: “On my orders, coalition forces have begun striking selected targets of military importance to undermine Saddam Hussein’s ability to wage war.”
* “We’d rather bomb Osama bin laden, but we have no idea where he is.”

2001 – California officials declared a power alert, ordering the first of two days of rolling blackouts.
* Rolling blackouts, or as they call them in California, “Nick Noltes.”

1996 – Nelson and Winnie Mandela got divorced. They had been married for nearly 40 years, during which he spent 30 in jail.
* Like most marriages, it probably would’ve worked out if they’d just spent more time apart.

1931 – World-renowned hangover cure Alka-Seltzer went on sale.
* “Plop-plop, fizz-fizz – Oh, my HEAD! Why is it so LOUD?”

1931- Nevada legalized gambling.
* People needed something constructive to do while they waited for the divorce to become final.

1915 – Pluto was photographed for the first time.
* For his Dog License.

1831 – The first U.S. bank robbery took place, with the theft of $245,000 from City Bank in New York.
* Back then, a quarter-million-dollar spending spree in New York could easily last over a week.

721 B.C. – The first-ever recorded solar eclipse was seen from Babylon.
* It was witnessed by Cleopatra, Tutankhamen and a young Keith Richards.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2005 – 50 Cent became the first solo artist to have three singles in the U.S. Top 5. “Candy Shop” was at No.1, “How We Do” by The Game (a member of his G-Unit group) was at No.4, and “Disco Inferno” was at No.5.

2001 – Former Spice Girl Geri Halliwell’s London home was broken into. The intruder(s) left obscene notes on the walls, stole the singer’s computer and stereo and threw milk and fruit drink on the walls. They also stole a necklace that previously belonged to actress Liz Taylor.

1999 – Country singer George Jones walked out of the hospital 13 days after a near fatal traffic accident. Jones, 67, thanked Vanderbilt University Medical Center doctors and nurses before climbing aboard his tour bus for the ride home to a Nashville suburb.

1982 – Randy Rhoads, 25, the lead guitarist for heavy metal star Ozzy Osbourne, was killed when the plane in which he was flying buzzed Osbourne’s parked tour bus, clipping it and crashing into a house in Leesburg, Fla.

1974 – Jefferson Airplane was renamed Jefferson Starship.

1957 – Elvis Presley bought Graceland in Memphis for $102,500.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. The average American does THIS 13.2 times a year. What is it?
Washes their car

2. If you’re an average American adult, you’ll do THIS five times this year. What is it?
Go to a movie

3. A recent survey extrapolated that for an entire year, 76 million Americans didn’t do THIS even once. What is it?
Read a book

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