WEDNESDAY, Jan 24 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR WEDNESDAY, January 24, 2024
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: A & M AUTOLAND – Oxymorons

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

BEER CAN APPRECIATION DAY
The History website says this:
“Canned beer made its debut on this day in 1935. In partnership with the American Can Company, the Gottfried Krueger Brewing Company delivered 2,000 cans of Krueger’s Finest Beer and Krueger’s Cream Ale to faithful Krueger drinkers in Richmond, Virginia. Ninety-one percent of the drinkers approved of the canned beer, driving Krueger to give the green light to further production.”

BELLY LAUGH DAY
The Days Of The Year website says this:
“Belly Laugh Day is a day for having a good chuckle at anything at all. Did you know that laughter has been know to causes the tissue lining our blood vessels to expand and increase blood flow? This in turn makes you feel more positive, boosts your immune system and generally just makes us feel happier! Even just looking forward to something in advance has similar positive effects as the act itself! It reduces stress and increases chemicals that help relaxation. Let’s get people laughing anywhere and everywhere!”

CHANGE A PET’S LIFE DAY
The Sergeants blog says this:
“Not only is changing a pet’s life easy to do, it’s an act that will give back a hundredfold. This special day was created to encourage pet adoption and to spread awareness about animal welfare. Hundreds of shelters across the U.S. participate by offering reduced adoption rates and there are many ways you can celebrate! And, you’ll not only change a pet’s life, but your life may change forever as well.”

NATIONAL COMPLIMENT DAY

NATIONAL PEANUT BUTTER DAY

TALK LIKE A GRIZZLED PROSPECTOR DAY

January is:

Adopt a Rescued Bird Month
Be Kind to Food Servers Month
Family Fit Lifestyle Month
Financial Wellness Month
Get Organized Month
National Candy Month
National Clean Up Your Computer Month
National Hobby Month
National Skating Month
National Train Your Dog Month
Walk Your Pet Month

THE BUZZ

WHAT WILL THE WORLD BE LIKE IN 2024?

There’s a piece floating around the internet about a collection of predictions from a variety of experts of the day in 1924 guessing what the world will be like in 100 years. Well, here it is 100 years later. Here’s what they though the world would be like:
– “People will live to be 100 years old, and 75 years would be considered as young.”
– No one would have teeth. (* They should have specified ‘their own teeth.’)
– Horses will be extinct, or at least endangered: “In another hundred years, you may find horses in zoos. I am sure you will not find them anywhere else.” (* Now we have them in big box stores as emotional support animals.)
– Motorcars increasing and multiplying indefinitely. (* Give that predictor a shiny new dollar. He nailed it.)
– Everyone would be flying to work. “It will be the everyday occurrence for the businessman to fly from home to office, and back home again.”
– “Apartment buildings that are 100 stories tall.”
– Family albums made of movies instead of photographs.
– Beds that fling children out of bed in the morning.
– “People hopping from planet to planet as easily as we soar through the sky now.”
– “The debutante of 100 years hence may dye her complexion and hair all the colours of the rainbow.” (* SO he predicted punk rock.)
– Men’s legs withering away from lack of exercise. (* Nailed it.)
– Canada will have 100 million people. (* Were Canadians particularly hornier back in 1924?)
– Diamond supply will be exhausted within 100 years – couples will plight their troth with synthetic gem fused from 100 pounds of sugar.” (* It was just two years ago that men plighted their troth by giving multipacks of hard-to-find toilet paper.)
– “The radio will excite laughter among Americans of A.D. 2024.” (* Jeeze, our show misses that prediction by a mile.)

U.S. NEWS

BOEING PLANE LOSES TIRE ON THE RUNWAY

Not a good month for Boeing. It came out Tuesday afternoon – (* I thought the internet was supposed to make all news immediate?) – that last weekend a Boeing 757 lost its front tire as the aircraft was preparing to depart for an international flight. Just before noon Saturday at the Atlanta International Airport, a Delta flight bound for Bogota, Colombia, was taxiing across the runway into takeoff position when another plane alerted the control tower that one of their nose tires just came off. The tire rolled all the way across the runway before slipping down an embankment. Maintenance crews were called to the scene to locate the tire, while the flights in line behind were forced to wait in place. It remains unclear what led to the detachment of the tire.
* Look: the nuts that hold the plug door in place have to come from somewhere, right?
* And just try finding an airplane tire guy on a Saturday, not to mention the overtime fee for weekend work.
* Another 20 minutes and that tire would have been some Atlanta guy’s backyard tire swing.
* Maybe go back to building the planes they had in the 50s and 60s, when America could still make good stuff.
* Boy, the Boeing CEO must dread it every time his phone rings.

AMISH BUGGYJACKING

An Amish family in Michigan had their horse and buggy jacked after stopping in at a Walmart. The family stopped to shop at a Walmart in Sturgis, Michigan. When they came out of the store, there was no trace of their buggy. A truck driver parked in the lot reported he had seen a woman jump into the buggy and take off with it. The horse and buggy were found unoccupied later in the evening around two miles away. The suspect, a 31-year-old local woman, was later found at a nearby motel and arrested for larceny of livestock.
* What’s worse, the catalytic converter was missing.
* She abandoned the buggy when the engine got hungry.
* Did the horse not leave a, you know, a trail to follow?
* It’s like a Grand Theft Auto mission from 1840.

A GATHERING OF MANATEES

There’s a huge manatee gathering going on at Florida’s Blue Spring State Park. The recent cold weather brought a record number of manatees together – 932 were counted in the park’s comparatively warm waters Sunday. The water in the springs are at a constant temperature of 72 degrees. Manatees can face health problems if they remain too long in water colder than 68 degrees, and cold stress can lead to death for the mammals. They also face threats from lack of food supply and boat propellers.
* Manatees should thank their lucky stars we let them exist.
* Oh, the warm manatees!
* What is a group of manatees called? There is no name – this is true – because they usually only travel in pairs or very small groups. And scientists, frankly, have moved on to rhinos, they’re more interesting.
* An endangerment of manatees? A flotilla of manatees? A floater of manatees? A ComicCon of manatees?
* It’s fun watching the bunch of manatees, but there’s a lot of litter from their Big Gulp containers and hot dog wrappers.
* I could like manatees more, but they look too much like Barney the Dinosaur.

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

GUY POSES AS HIS GIRLFRIEND TO TAKE HER EXAM

In India, a 26-year-old man was arrested after masquerading as his girlfriend so he could take an exam in her place. Angrez Singh – the WORLD’S BEST BOYFRIEND – tried to take his girlfriend’s entrance exam to become a healthcare worker. She had failed the test once before. Mr. Singh shaved his facial hair, applied makeup and dressed in women’s clothes before entering the exam room. He forged his girlfriend’s voter card and ID card, but exam officials grew suspicious after noticing that his face didn’t match her picture on the original application form (Ya think?). Both Singh and his girlfriend are facing multiple charges.
* He failed the important part.
* At least it was an entrance exam and not, say, a gynecological exam.
* He probably also used the wrong restroom. Fatal flaw in these kind of plans.
* They should have gone with the “he tells her the correct answers through a hidden earphone” plan.
* On the bright side, the two of them enjoyed getting into some kinky stuff while he was pretending to be a girl.

PHOTOGRAPHER TEACHES RATS TO TAKE SELFIES, AND THEY CAN’T STOP

Augustin Lignier, a professional photographer in Paris, wanted to find out why so many of us feel compelled to photograph our lives and share those images online. So, he taught a couple of rats to take photos of themselves, and found out they wouldn’t stop doing it. Mr. Lignier built his own version of a Skinner box — whenever the rats pressed a button inside the box, they got a small dose of sugar and a camera snapped their photo. The resulting images were immediately displayed on a screen where the rats could see them. Soon, he reduced the number of times the rats got a sugar fix. Yet they still hit the button to be photographed. Lignier admits that the rats probably can’t comprehend the photos. It was the intermittent reward that kept them pressing the picture button. Mr. Lignier noted the obvious: Digital and social media companies use the same intermittent reward concept to keep the attention of the viewer as long as possible. Social media doles out periodic, unpredictable rewards — a “like,” a tweet, a promising romantic match — that keep us glued to our phones.
* And as long as that intermittent science grant money keeps coming, he’ll keep coming up with goofy experiments.
* The worst part? When the rats make a “duck face” for their selfies. Not pretty.
* It’s also not pretty when they use Snapchat filters.
* The rats don’t ACTUALLY go on social media, ’cause they have no money to get blue checkmarks on X.
* What exactly are you implying, Mr. Lignier? And pass the cheese.
* Meanwhile, he says, anyone want to buy a picture book about rat selfies?

TRENDING

CHRIS YOUNG ARRESTED

Country star Chris Young, 38, was arrested Monday at a bar in Midtown Manhattan, charged with resisting arrest, disorderly conduct and assault on an officer. Young was at the Tin Roof bar about 8:30 p.m. Monday when agents from the Alcoholic Beverage Commission arrived to do a compliance check on the bar. Young grabbed his ID and held it in his hand above his head. An agent scanned it, and everything was okay. Young then started asking questions of the agents and began video recording them. The agents left for the Dawg House bar next door to continue compliance checks, but Young and several friends followed the agents. At some point, an agent began giving Young orders, he didn’t comply, so they put him in handcuffs. According to the affidavit, Young had slurred speech, bloodshot eyes, and watery eyes. (* And now, more country cred than he ever had before.)

OSCAR NOMINATIONS ANNOUNCED

The nominees for this year’s Academy Awards were announced Tuesday morning. Here are the major categories:
– Best Picture:
– American Fiction
– Anatomy of a Fall
– Barbie
– The Holdovers
– Killers of the Flower Moon
– Maestro
– Oppenheimer
– Past Lives
– Poor Things
– The Zone of Interest

Best Actor:
– Bradley Cooper (Maestro)
– Colman Domingo (Rustin)
– Paul Giamatti (The Holdovers)
– Cillian Murphy (Oppenheimer)
– Jeffrey Wright (American Fiction)

Best Actress:
– Annette Bening (Nyad)
– Lily Gladstone (Killers of the Flower Moon)
– Sandra Hüller (Anatomy of a Fall)
– Carey Mulligan (Maestro)
– Emma Stone (Poor Things)

Best Supporting Actor:
– Sterling K. Brown (American Fiction)
– Robert De Niro (Killers of the Flower Moon)
– Robert Downey Jr. (Oppenheimer)
– Ryan Gosling (Barbie)
– Mark Ruffalo (Poor Things)

Best Supporting Actress:
– Emily Blunt (Oppenheimer)
– Danielle Brooks (The Color Purple)
– America Ferrera (Barbie)
– Jodie Foster (Nyad)
– Da’Vine Joy Randolph (The Holdovers)

Best Animated Feature:
– The Boy and the Heron
– Elemental
– Nimona
– Robot Dreams
– Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

January 26, Friday – Int’l Holocaust Remembrance Day (UN)
February 2, Friday – Groundhog Day
February 10, Saturday – Chinese New Year (The Year of the Dragon)
February 12, Monday – Lincoln’s Birthday
February 14, Wednesday – Valentine’s Day
February 19, Monday – Presidents Day / Washington’s Birthday
February 13, Tuesday – Shrove Tuesday/Mardi Gras
March 10, Sunday – Daylight Saving Time Begins
March 17, Sunday – St. Patrick’s Day
March 19, Tuesday – Spring begins, Spring Equinox is 11:06 p.m. EDT
March 20, Wednesday – First full day of Spring

BIRTHDAYS

Daveed Diggs (actor, “black-ish”) … 42
Christina Moses (actress, “A Million Little Things”) … 46
Ed Helms (actor, “Vacation,” “Hangover” movies, “The Office”) … 50
Matthew Lillard (Shaggy in some of the “Scooby-Doo” movies) … 54
Nastassja Kinski (actress, “Cat People”) … 63
Neil Diamond (singer, songwriter) … 83
Aaron Neville (singer) … 83
Ray Stevens (novelty song singer) … 85

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“Music has the ear of the world. Composers have the unlimited opportunity to move people emotionally and uplift them spiritually.”

(A) Eminem
(B) Snoop Dogg
(C) Neil Diamond

ANSWER: (C) Neil Diamond

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2004 – NASA’s Opportunity rover landed on Mars three weeks after its identical twin, Spirit.
* Two for the price of one! Wait – this is the government work – make that two for the price of four!

1985 – The Voyager II spacecraft transmitted the first-ever close-up pictures of Uranus.
* That was the historic day in comedy when a TV announcer said, “Look! Uranus has rings around it!”, and 9-year-old Randy Guggemheim of Jersey City made his famous crack: “I guess that’s from sitting on the toilet too long.”

1935 – The Kruger Brewery in Virginia sold the first beer in cans.
* Finally, I get to announce an anniversary that’s really important.

1922 – The Eskimo Pie was patented by Christian K. Nelson of Iowa.
* Now I know who to curse when I get on the bathroom scale.

1908 – The first Boy Scout troop was organized.
* Insert your own Michael Jackson joke here.

1899 – The rubber shoe heel was patented by Humphrey O’Sullivan.
* Known earlier as “Ol’ Slip and Fall on His Big Butt O’Sullivan.”

1888 – The typewriter ribbon was patented.
* Whatever that is.

1848 – James Marshall finds gold at Sutter’s Mill in California, starting the great California Gold Rush.
* Sutter was heard to say, “I KNEW I shouldn’t have sold that mill!”

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2021 – Country music singer Morgan Wallen was at No.1 on the U.S. album chart with his second studio album “Dangerous: The Double Album.” In March 2022, the album established the all-time record for the longest duration at the No.1 spot (98 weeks and counting) on Billboard’s Country Albums chart.

2016 – David Bowie was at No.1 on both the UK & U.S. album charts with his twenty-fifth and final studio album “Blackstar,” Bowie’s only album to top the Billboard 200 in the U.S.

2008 – Amy Winehouse entered rehab. A statement from her record company, Universal, said she entered the facility “after talks with her record label, management, family and doctors to continue her ongoing recovery against drug addiction.” Winehouse died at the age of 27 of alcohol poisoning on July 23, 2011.

1981 – Steve Tyler of Aerosmith was hospitalized after a crash on his motorbike.

1979 – The Clash released their first single in the U.S., “I Fought The Law.”

1976 – Bob Dylan started a five-week run at No.1 on the U.S. album chart with “Desire.”

1976 – Diana Ross went to No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with “Theme From Mahogany,” the singer’s third U.S. No.1.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. The average American will spend 5 minutes a day doing THIS. What is it?
Looking for their keys

2. We spend about 23 minutes of every day doing THIS. What is it?
Blinking

3. According to a recent survey, the average person spends about 15 hours a week doing THIS. What is it?
Worrying

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