"SUPPORT" MONKEY GETS LOOSE ON PLANE

An “emotional support monkey” was briefly loose on a Las Vegas-bound Frontier flight from Columbus, Ohio late Tuesday. It’s unclear what type of monkey it was, but a Frontier staffer reported that the monkey was an emotional support animal, adding that “the passenger had all the proper paperwork to have the monkey on the plane with him.” No injuries were reported as of early Wednesday.
* The passengers went bananas.
* A Frontier flight? Yeah, the frontier of Africa.
* How does this work? You go to a psychiatrist, tell him you’re oversensitive, and he says “What you need is a monkey.”
* This is getting out of control. My last flight, I had a lady claiming to have a “support baby” with her. Come on.
* Coming soon: Chimps on a Plane.
* This emotional-support thing is such a scam. It’s just an excuse to take your dog into the supermarket.
* Wait ’til our supermarkets have fleas. That’s when we’ll need the emotional support.
* How does a monkey show emotional support in Vegas? By counting cards?
* “All the proper paperwork”? That’s just code for “the passenger covered his ass.”