STOP PETTING THE WOMBAT

Maria Island, just off the eastern coast of Tasmania, is inhabited by a large number of wombats, the adorable marsupials known for their resemblance to teddy bears. They also have mysterious cube-shaped poo. Now, the local tourism board is asking visitors to stop touching the wombats. As you arrive on Maria Island, you’re greeted with signs that read: “I take this pledge to respect and protect the furred and feathered residents of Maria. Wombats, when you trundle past me I pledge I will not chase you with my selfie stick, or get too close to your babies. I will not surround you, or try and pick you up. I pledge to let you stay wild.” John Fitzgerald, the CEO of Tasmania Tourism, says, “There was no particular incident that occurred; it’s just seeing an increased activity and people wanting to have photos of animals and get up close to them.”
* If this doesn’t work, Mr. Fitzgerald will replace all the wombats with porcupines.
* Chris Hemsworth lives in that part of the world, and he has a similar sign in his house.
* Some of the smarter wombats are now wearing signs that say “Meet me behind the eucalyptus tree and you can pet me for $20.”
* But go ahead and touch all the cube-shaped wombat poo you want.
* Or Chris Hemsworth’s poo, too, for that matter.