POLICE NAB MAN IN BED WITH STOLEN MANNEQUIN

Police in Nashville, Tennessee, arrested a man Monday night after they caught him in bed with a stolen lingerie store mannequin. An assistant manager at the Hustler Hollywood store said that she saw the suspect, Christopher Wade, 55, flee with the mannequin just after midnight. The employee said that she argued with the suspect, who police say was intoxicated, and then he tossed the mannequin in his truck. The mannequin lost her left arm as Wade fled the scene. (* That’s no way to treat a lady!) Police tracked the vehicle down to an address in the Old Hickory neighborhood and found Wade in bed with the you-know-what. Wade is charged with theft of property. An employee told police that the mannequin is worth $5,000.
* But now, that mannequin is worth nothin’.
* How can the mannequin be worth $5,000 when a hooker costs just a fraction of that?
* One arm came off? That means it couldn’t even hug him.
* They caught him in bed? Wow, not even a little sweet talk first?
* I don’t picture a Hustler Hollywood store in Nashville, Tennessee.
* As of this morning, 73 Nashville songwriters have written a song about it.
* And there’s 3 new bands called the Lingerie Store Mannequins.
* Now the man is claiming that him and the mannequin are just good friends.