POLICE INVESTIGATE THEFT OF $70,000 OF BULL SEMEN

Police are investigating the theft of about $70,000 worth of bull semen from a farm in southern Minnesota. A LeRoy, Minnesota farmer reported that a storage canister with vials of bull semen was taken from his unlocked barn. The theft happened sometime between April 1 and 7. The farmer said the only time he and his hired hand were away from the farm was on Easter Sunday. The canister was worth about $500, and the vials of semen were worth from $300 to $1,500 apiece. Police have no suspects.
* But they are looking for a man who can’t stop washing his hands.
* This is like locking the barn door after the horse is gone, except they’re bulls and they haven’t even been born yet.
* How’d you like to have the job title of ‘hired hand’ on a bull breeding farm?
* Oh, well – back to growing corn.
* The only time they were away was on Easter? I think we can narrow this time window down a little.
* This was just God’s way of saying “Thanks for going to church on Easter Sunday.”
* Think of it from the bulls point of view: “You’re back for more already?”
* “Man, you’ll have to give me some pictures of a pretty cow or something. I’m exhausted here.”
* The real bad part is afterwards when the bull wants to cuddle.
* Wait, it’s a male. There probably isn’t a lot of cuddling.