Today Is…
Anything special being celebrated or commemorated today? Find out here!
TODAY’S ALMANAC
Birthdays, Upcoming Holidays, This Day in History and Music
TODAY’S TRIVIA
Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three obscure facts.
ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES
ESPN FIRES ANNOUNCER IN MIDDLE OF LIVE BROADCAST
“Bye bye baby!” – Russ Hodges
WHAT TO WATCH – New and Returning Shows and Movies
Premiering Monday through Wednesday
“THE ODYSSEY” IN IMAX: ONLY 25 THEATERS
And they’re all sold out.
DISNEY REBOOTS MICKEY MOUSE CLUB
And doing it without a net.
“TODAY SHOW” INTRUDER LUNGES AT CRAIG MELVIN
Who coulda forecast this, right Al Roker?
WHAT TO WATCH – New and Returning Shows and Movies
Premiering Thursday through Sunday
MONOPOLY: THE TV SHOW
Not a CHANCE I’ll be watching this.
WORLD CUP AI PREDICTOR IS DEAD ON
They all laughed.
WHAT TO WATCH – New and Returning Shows and Movies
Premiering Monday through Wednesday
JOKE OF THE DAY
Suggestion: Post the joke on your website. Boost clicks by having listeners call in and tell the Joke of the Day to win a prize.
What did the full glass say to the empty glass?
You’re drunk.
The CEO of a big company walked into the office and saw a man scrolling through his phone while sitting on a sofa.
The CEO asked, “What are you doing?” The man says, “Wasting my time until I’ll get paid.” The CEO was furious, “What is your weekly salary!?” Man, “1000 dollars” The CEO counts out $2000 and gives it to the man, “Take this money and get out! You don’t work here anymore!” The guys takes the money and leaves. CEO says to the reception, “Who was that guy?” The receptionist says, “Pizza delivery”.
A wife was giving birth and having a difficult time with it.
Her husband said “I’m sorry you’re in such pain. I wish I could help.” She says, “It’s OK. It’s not your fault.”
Why do ballerinas love the number four?
Tutus.
Wife is out in the backyard, pulling weeds in the hot sun.
Husband comes out, says, “What’s for dinner?” She’s a little angry. She says, “Pretend I’m out of town, go make dinner yourself.” Guy goes inside, cooks up a beautiful steak, baked potato and a beer. Wife comes in. Says, “Where’s my dinner?” Husband says, “I thought you were out of town.”
U.S. NEWS
TOWN UNVEILS WORLD’S TALLEST NUTCRACKER
Welcome to Tourist Trap, Minnesota!
KID USES ROPING SKILLS TO SAVE DROWNING MAN
Yippee-ti-ay!
MIRROR IN SPACE APPROVED
♫ I’m walkin’ on sunshine, ooo-oo… ♪♪
LAWYER TRIES TO WEASEL OUT OF MORTGAGE, CLAIMING TO BE BI-POLAR
Lawyering at its finest.
MAN STABBED IN THE ANGRY JERK RESTAURANT
Go figure.
NAKED MAN SURFS MOVING LOCOMOTIVE
Driver 8, take a break.
PIGEON GETS OXYGEN FROM FIREFIGHTER
This story’s for the birds.
INTERNATIONAL NEWS
AUSTRALIAN WOMAN GIVES BIRTH TO IDENTICAL QUADS
Eight arms to hold you.
GUY BREAKS MILE WORLD RECORD
Hot to trot.
WOMAN CAUGHT SMUGGLING PYTHON IN HER BRA
Snakes in a Bra on a Plane.
WORLD CUP: A STRANGE COINCIDENCE
Lionel Messi (ARG) once gave Lamine Yamal (ESP) a bath.
BEAR STEALS GOLFER’S CLUBS
That’s a gimme.
BRITISH AIR CREW PARTIES HARD BEFORE FLIGHT
Can you blame them?
MAN PARTIALLY SUCKED OUT OF AIRPLANE WINDOW
Oh, Boeing, you’ve done it again, you little scamp.
MUSEUM SPREADS PEANUT BUTTER ON THE FLOOR TO HONOR LATE ARTIST
Vincent Van Skippy.
FUNNY PICTURES
Right-click on images to
Copy or Save.
Fred’s Discount Hearse
Do We Have To Turn Everything Into A Contest?
Advanced Bonsai
So… Where Ya Been?
I Know Those Guys
Custom Console
THE BUZZ
NICKNAMES
It means we like you.
WE SIT TOO MUCH
Shocking study from the Sherlock Institute.
THE MOST-PURCHASED ICE CREAM FLAVORS
Fro-yo? No-no.
SHOWER THOUGHTS
Thanks for sharing.
THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WORD IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE
We’d like a word with you.
SPIDER SPEEDS
There’s one on your shoulder right now.
MY CHEAP PARENTS
Tightwads.
DUMB HEADLINES
Have listeners vote for the dumbest.
TRENDING
NEW MOVIES
Click on name for details and audio clips
HAUNTED HEIST
Starts Friday, July 24 in theaters.
PINOCCHIO UNSTRUNG
Starts Friday, July 24 in theaters.
THE ODYSSEY
Starts Friday, July 17 in theaters.
MOANA
Starts Friday, July 10 in theaters.
Click on the title to go to an mp3 player. To download the mp3, right-click on the player and choose the “Save audio as” option.
A & M AUTOLAND – Crazy Mike
You don’t have to be crazy to shop at A & M – but it helps.
ALPHA-MALE BITS
Part of this new vicious breakfast.
THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS
For Friday, July 17.
BROUGHT TO YOU BY
Funny fake sponsorship announcements
A & M AUTOLAND – Christmas In July
‘Tis the season to be stupid.
THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS
For Friday, July 10,
PROMOS-TO-GO
Pre-produced ready-to-use show bumper donuts
A & M AUTOLAND- The Bed Bunker
If at first you don’t succeed – at selling cars – try selling something else.
LAWN DIRECTOR
Be the first on your block to have a blockbuster lawn.
THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS
For Friday, July 3.
SONIC BOOMERS
For when you’re tired of fireworks that just go boom.
BROUGHT TO YOU BY
Funny fake sponsorship announcements
A & M AUTOLAND – 4th of July
Big Mike wishes he could declare independence – from Big Al.
NEWSSTAND FIREWORKS 2026
Explosive headlines!
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