OLDEST WOMAN IN WORLD TURNS 129, STILL WISHES SHE WERE DEAD

A Russian woman purported to be the world’s oldest person has celebrated her 129th birthday – but she wishes she had died young. Russian officials believe Koku Istambulova is 129-years-old – they say her passport states her date of birth as 1 June 1889 – which would make her the oldest person in the world. Koku, from the village of Bratskoye in the south-western Russian Chechen Republic, celebrated her birthday at the start of this month with her six grandchildren and 16 great-grandchildren. Her children have all died. She said: “I see other people eating healthy and doing fitness routines, I have no idea why I have lived so long.” Koku has told journalists that she wishes she had died young, saying, “I have not had a single happy day in my life. I have always worked hard, digging in the garden. I am tired. Long life is not at all God’s gift for me – but a punishment.”
* I think we can all take inspiration from Koku’s words.
* What keeps her alive? It’s obvious – joy. The joy of the world around her, which would be the paradise that is the village of Bratskoye in the south-western Russian Chechen Republic.
* Wow. 129 years of bringing people down.
* You know the old joke: “Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering – and it’s all over much too soon.” Except for this lady.
* Can’t someone do her a favor – like tie a string across the top of the staircase?
* Maybe she just needs a new hobby, like crossword puzzles or skydiving.
* For her birthday, her family all chipped in and got her a jet ski.
* She hasn’t had a single happy day in her life. But there was a Tuesday in 1916 that was pretty decent from noon to about 1:30.
* Well, nice talking to you, Koku. Now get yourself out back – that garden isn’t going to dig itself.