MAN SHOOTS UP BATHROOM WHEN OCCUPANT TAKES TOO LONG

A Vernon, Connecticut, man is behind bars after shooting up his neighbor’s bathroom because the person using it was taking too long. Shawn Cummins, 22, was arrested early Sunday morning after police got a call about a highly intoxicated man at a local apartment complex. Responding officers said Cummins went over to his neighbor’s apartment to hang out around 2 a.m. At some point, he became upset because someone wouldn’t get out of the bathroom. Cummins allegedly showed his displeasure by taking out his 9mm handgun out and firing one shot into the closed bathroom door. The bullet barely missed the person inside, police said. The occupants of the apartment then yelled at him to leave. Cummins went outside and shot another round into the outside wall of the apartment complex. No one was injured.
* Now THAT’S a relief.
* He fired into the bathroom door? That’ll really cut down on your reading time in the john.
* Some good did come out of it: He discovered a foolproof cure for constipation.
* On the bright side, his cell probably has it’s own toilet.
* It’s right in the middle of the floor in plain sight, but still.
* I suppose he could have walked back to his own bathroom, but that would have been too much hassle.
* After all, you know how big those apartment complexes can be. Who wants to walk that far?
* At least he should have gotten off a courtesy shot first.