FRIDAY, Jan 31 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR FRIDAY, January 31, 2025
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing – including “holidays” created by the National Day Calendar and Wellcat websites to drive traffic to their websites – or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

BACKWARD DAY (Not to be confused with “Opposite Day,” Jan. 25)
The Holiday Insights website says this:
“Backward Day is a day to do everything backwards. Use your imagination, and Backward Day can be lots of fun. It’s especially popular with school aged kids. Try writing backwards or reading backwards. Wear your shirt with the back in the front. Eat your meals, starting with dessert. Walk backwards, or talk backwards. This day is limited only by your imagination.”

BRANDY ALEXANDER DAY

INSPIRE YOUR HEART WITH ART DAY
The Holidays Calendar website says this:
“National Inspire Your Heart with Art Day is a holiday that encourages every single one of us to consider how much art means to us. Enjoying and creating art are activities that provide everyone with some very distinct benefits. It helps inspire creativity, it can make people think, and it can lift people’s moods. Sharing art with others can even make people feel less lonely. That’s probably why humans have been creating art since the beginning of time. If you’re wondering how art might add value to your life, then observing this holiday is a good day to begin your journey.”

INTERNATIONAL ZEBRA DAY

NATIONAL FUN AT WORK DAY
* Fun? At WORK? How is that possible? Oh, wait – It’s Backward Day today. Cute.

NATIONAL HOT CHOCOLATE DAY

January is:

Adopt a Rescued Bird Month
Be Kind to Food Servers Month
Family Fit Lifestyle Month
Financial Wellness Month
Get Organized Month
National Candy Month
National Clean Up Your Computer Month
National Hobby Month
National Skating Month
National Train Your Dog Month
Walk Your Pet Month

ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES

NBA COMMISSIONER WANTS TO SHORTEN GAMES

NBA commissioner Adam Silver said Wednesday that he likes the idea of shortening games from 48 minutes to 40 minutes by going from 12-minute quarters to 10. Silver, during an appearance on The Dan Patrick Show, noted that the NBA is the only league in the world that plays 48 minutes. Of course, shortening the length of the game would change the record books. On the other hand, a number of the league’s stars could play entire games more frequently instead of having to sit out and rest. It also means the reserve players would get less playing time, and salaries would come down.
* And, of course, ticket prices would come down, too, right? Right?
* Great. Now when there’s a game I’ll know even sooner how much I lost on FanDuel.
* I always thought basketball games should just be five minutes long. Most every game always comes down to the last five minutes anyway.
* I don’t know about shortening the games, but my wife thinks they should shorten the shorts.

THE BUZZ

WOMAN PLANS CRUISE FOR HERSELF AND HUSBAND; MOTHER-IN-LAW SURPRISES THEM ON BOARD

In a post on Reddit’s “Am I The A-hole” page, a 35-year-old woman writes that she planned an anniversary cruise for just for her husband and herself. She spent three months planning and coordinating with her own parents to stay with their young children. They flew from the southwest U.S. to Florida to board their ship. Then, she writes: “As soon as we got to our room to store our bags my mother-in-law calls. She excitedly explains that she and her husband are ON the ship, too.” The woman says her husband is active duty military so vacations are not a regular thing. The woman let her husband know that she “wasn’t thrilled,” but “he was excited to see his mom.” She said they spent the bulk of the trip with her mother-in-law, because her father-in-law “wasn’t feeling well.” She writes, “After we made it home I let my husband know how truly upset I was, and he went off on me stating that his mother did nothing wrong.” Now, the woman wants to know if she’s in the wrong “for being upset that my vacation was crashed and completely ruined?”
* Sounds like the father-in-law understood immediately what was happening.
* This is what excursions in the port cities are for. Send mom on an excursion, tell her to make sure she’s back on the boat by four, when it actually leaves at three.
* I’d ask my mother-in-law’s opinion on this, but we’re not speaking.
* This could be an episode of a sit-com. Or an episode of “Dateline.”
* This woman learned a very important lesson: keep your mouth shut when talking to your in-laws.
* PHONE TOPIC: Do you have a mother-in-law from hell, like this poor woman?

GROUNDHOG ACCURACY VIS-A-VIS WEATHER PREDICTING

The U.S. National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration has released a study analyzing the annual prognostications of weather-predicting groundhogs. Groundhog Day is coming this Sunday. The organization looked at groundhogs — along with one prairie dog statue and a tortoise — to see which were the most accurate in predicting whether spring would come early or late. Only groundhogs who have been predicting the weather for at least 20 years were included in the study, and each had to still be active as of Feb. 2, 2024.
1. The most accurate weather predictor of the bunch was found to be Staten Island Chuck, who accurately predicted the arrival of spring 85% of the time.
2. Georgia’s General Beauregard Lee, at 80%.
3. A Wyoming Prairie Dog statue named Lander Lil, with 75%.
4. A mythical West Virginia groundhog named Concord Charlie, at 65%.
5. Illinois’ Gertie the Groundhog, with 65%.
The most famous weather-predicting groundhog, Pennsylvania’s Punxsutawney Phil, was in 17th place, having predicted the weather accurately just 35% of the time.
* Aw, come on. It’s just a slump. He’ll come back. I think it’s the drinking.
* The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration might want to rethink coming out with this study at this particular point in the new administration.
* I predict the people involved in this flagrant exercise in government waste will be gone in much less than six weeks.
* And why doesn’t this study mention how accurate the U.S. National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration has been?
* You want a better prediction of how long winter will last? Just wait ’til Punxsutawney Phil’s replaced by AI.

U.S. NEWS

MAN BREAKS INTO ESCAPE ROOM

In Tulsa, Oklahoma, a man was arrested Tuesday night after he broke into an escape room business. Police say David Bell, a former maintenance worker for the building, has been harassing the tenant since he was let go by the building owner a year ago. That tenant was the Xcapery, an escape room business. Officers tracked him through the Xcapery building on multiple floors, eventually sending in a K9 officer to help find him. Mr. Bell was found hiding on top of an elevator between floors.
* Talk about missing the concept.
* Well, heck, it IS Backward Day today! (True – See today’s “Today Is …” feature)
* He thought he was in the Tulsa Hide-and-Seekery. Totally different thing.
* Of course once they caught him, it took police 90 minutes to find their way out of the building, and they had to ask for clues twice.
* Now he’s headed for a REALLY escape-proof room.

FLORIDA MAN JAILED FOR BOLOGNA ASSAULT

A Florida man, 29-year-old Oquavious Chandler, was arrested Sunday following an assault with a bologna sandwich spurred by a confrontation with a roommate over use of a PlayStation 5. Mr. Chandler’s roommate told cops he removed a PlayStation 5 from Chandler’s bedroom because he “was being too loud” while using it. Chandler became aggressive and began to yell at him, and then threw a bologna sandwich at him, which hit him in the center of his chest. The bologna battery would normally be charged as a misdemeanor, but Chandler has multiple prior battery convictions – two of which also involved him being angry over video games.
* Angry how? Too hard to get to the next level?
* Man, he’s the wurst.
* The answer is obvious, right? The man needs to be banned from possessing bologna sandwiches.
* Oquavious, huh? So he’s named for the sign of the zodiac that comes between Capricorn and Pisces?
* Look, I know you shouldn’t throw stuff at people, but to hurt someone with a baloney sandwich, wouldn’t it have to be going, like, 700 miles an hour?
* From felonious assault to balonius assault!

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

WOMAN CHARGED WITH CYBER-FARTING

A Welsh woman is in court for sending videos of herself breaking wind to her boyfriend’s ex-girlfriend. Rhiannon Evans, 25, of Caernarfon, Wales, is believed to be the first person to ever face charges for cyber-farting. The victim claims the videos caused her distress and anxiety. The prosecutor described in court how Evans filmed herself “placing the camera on her bottom and passing the gas.” She sent three videos on December 22 and another four over the next few days, including on Boxing Day (the day after Christmas) and New Year’s Day. The defense lawyer explained that Evans’ boyfriend is having issues with his ex regarding child visitation. Evans was fined £300 ($373), including £100 ($124) compensation for her victim and £199 ($247) for court costs, and also given a two-year restraining order preventing her from contacting her victim.
* A pretty fair judgment, in the end.
* She was ordered to pay tout suite.
* She sends a VIDEO of farting, but the stink fills HER house. Dumb!
* What about the boyfriend? Was he her partner in crime? Was he her fartner in crime?
* We can only hope cyber-farting doesn’t become the next TikTok challenge.
* This story brought to you by Beano.

TRENDING

KE HUY QUAN TO GET HANDPRINTS IN CEMENT AT CHINESE THEATER

This is a remarkable comeback story. Oscar-winning actor Ke Huy Quan will have his hand- and footprints enshrined in cement in front of the famous Chinese Theatre in Los Angeles on Monday. As a boy, Quan first appeared in “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom” in 1984, and then in “Goonies” in 1985, and “Encino Man” in 1992, and then all but disappeared from the Hollywood scene, spending the next 30 years getting small roles in smaller films. Then, in 2022, he suddenly popped up in “Everything Everywhere All At Once,” won an Oscar for it, and since then has had a strong career in A-pictures again. And now, he gets immortalized in cement in one of Hollywood’s most famous traditions. Quan’s “Everything Everywhere All at Once” directors Daniel Kwan and Daniel Scheinert are scheduled to speak at the ceremony.

PATTI SMITH COLLAPSES ON STAGE IN BRAZIL

1970’s punk rocker Patti Smith collapsed on stage in Brazil mid-performance. 30 minutes into her performance at Sao Paulo’s Cultura Artística Theater, the 78-year-old music legend was reading a statement about climate change when she went down. She later rolled back out in a wheelchair to let the crowd know she had to cut the rest of the show short. It later came out that Patti had been battling severe migraines recently and started feeling dizzy on stage during her performance, but was now being cared for by the “best doctors in the most loving way.”

SNL’S STAR-STUDDED CONCERT ON PEACOCK

Saturday Night Live has been celebrating 50 years on the air lately – maybe you’ve noticed. On Thursday, Peacock announced that it will live stream a star-packed concert special celebrating SNL‘s musical legacy. Jimmy Fallon will host the event, titled SNL50: The Homecoming Concert, from Radio City Music Hall on Feb. 14. The lineup for the show will feature performers who have appeared on SNL throughout its five decades. Those booked so far are, in alphabetical order: Arcade Fire, The B-52s, Backstreet Boys, Bad Bunny, David Byrne, Brandi Carlile, Miley Cyrus, DEVO, Brittany Howard, Jelly Roll, Lady Gaga, Chris Martin, Mumford & Sons, Post Malone, the Preservation Hall Jazz Band, Bonnie Raitt, Robyn, The Roots, Eddie Vedder and Jack White. More acts will be announced later.

MARIANNE FAITHFULL DIES AT 78

A footnote from the 1960’s has passed away. British singer and actor Marianne Faithfull – her real name – has died. She was 78. She was widely known for dating Mick Jagger (and possibly more!) of the Rolling Stones in the 1960’s, inspiring songs such as “Wild Horses” and “You Can’t Always Get What You Want.” She had a 1964 hit with the Jagger-Richards song “As Tears Go By,” and continued singing into the 1980’s. A statement from her manager read, “It is with deep sadness that we announce the death of the singer, songwriter and actress Marianne Faithfull. Marianne passed away peacefully in London today, in the company of her loving family.”

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

February 2, Sunday – Groundhog Day
February 12, Wednesday – Lincoln’s Birthday
February 14, Friday – Valentine’s Day
February 17, Monday – Presidents Day / Washington’s Birthday
March 9, Tuesday – Shrove Tuesday/Mardi Gras
March 9, Sunday – Daylight Saving Time Begins
March 17, Monday – St. Patrick’s Day
March 20, Thursday – Spring begins, Spring Equinox is 5:01 a.m. EDT

BIRTHDAYS

Tyler Hubbard (singer with Florida Georgia Line) … 38
Marcus Mumford (singer, musician with Mumford And Sons) … 38
Justin Timberlake (singer, former member of NSYNC) … 44
Bobby Moynihan (voice actor, comedian (“Saturday Night Live”) … 48
Kerry Washington (actress, “Scandal”) … 48
Portia de Rossi (actress, “Arrested Development,” “Scandal,” “Better Off Ted,” “Nip/Tuck,” “Ally McBeal,” married to Ellen DeGeneres) … 52
Minnie Driver (actress) … 55
Kelly Lynch (actress) … 66
Johnny Rotten (singer with The Sex Pistols, real name John Joseph Lydon) … 69
Harry Wayne Casey (singer with KC & The Sunshine Band) … 74
Jonathan Banks (actor, Mike Ehrmantraut on “Better Call Saul” and “Breaking Bad,” “Wiseguy”) … 78

Today’s Birthdays grade: Lots of singers from then and now, including one of the best-selling recording artists of all time with sales of over 117 million records worldwide (guess who). Actors, too, including a memorable castmember from “Breaking Bad” and “Better Call Saul.” Grade: B-plus.

[Want to try something different with the daily birthdays? Try grading them! Some days have “good” celebs, some have “great” celebs, some have “lousy” celebs. For fun, give the group an arbitrary grade: A-plus through F-minus. Sidekick will give you our take on it; you can to take the concept and run with it.]

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“I have a very expressive face that I can’t quite control.”

(A) Kristen Stewart
(B) The Burger King King
(C) Portia de Rossi

ANSWER: (C) Portia de Rossi

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2024 – Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg and social media companies Discord, TikTok, X and Snap were reprimanded before a U.S. congressional hearing for not doing enough to protect children online.
* So they fixed the problem IMMEDIATELY.

2022 – Online word puzzle Wordle was bought for a “low seven figure sum” by The New York Times.
* Can you spell “ka-ching” with just five letters?

2005 – Keanu Reeves received a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
* Or did that happen in a computer simulation?

1990 – McDonalds opened their first branch in Moscow. Thousands of Russians lined up outside for a chance to buy their food.
* They should have lined up inside, but it was force of habit.

1958 – The U.S. launched its first successful satellite, Explorer One.
* It was the first step on a long technological journey that would one day let us watch naked game shows from Europe.

1951 – President Harry Truman announced that he had ordered development of the hydrogen bomb.
* ‘Cause the plain old “atomic bomb” from the 40s just didn’t have enough kick.

1940 – Ida Mae Fuller became the first person to receive Social Security benefits – she had paid $22 into the fund and got back $20,000 over thirty-five years.
* Anybody under 40 listening right now – you can reverse those numbers to see how much you’ll pay in and get out.

1928 – “Scotch” brand tape was first marketed by the 3M Company.
* It was so successful, all three of the M’s came to stand for “money.”

1905 – The first automobile to exceed 100 mph was driven by A.G. MacDonald at Daytona Beach.
* He was just trying to impress chicks on Spring Break.

1867 – Vodka was first officially described by Russian Dmitry Mendeleev as part of his doctoral degree. His thesis in chemistry, “On Joining Spirits and Water,” earned him a full professorship at St. Petersburg University.
* Booze has been an official part of college life ever since.

1851 – Gail Borden announced the invention of evaporated milk.
* But every time he went to show it to someone, it was gone.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2016 – David Bowie left an estate valued at about $100m according to his will, which was filed in New York. Half would go to his widow, Iman, along with the home they shared in New York. The rest was shared between his son and daughter. Bowie’s personal assistant, Corinne Schwab, was left $2m and another $1m went to a former nanny, Marion Skene.

2010 – At the 52nd Annual Grammy Awards held at the Staples Center in Los Angeles Taylor Swift, at age 20, became the youngest artist ever to receive the Album of the Year award with “Fearless.” The Best Solo Rock Vocal Performance went to Bruce Springsteen for “Working on a Dream,” Best Rock Song went to Kings of Leon for “Use Somebody” and song of the Year went to Beyoncé for “Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It).”

1988 – Janet Jackson started a two-week run at No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with “Together Again.”

1981 – Blondie had their third U.S. No.1 single with “The Tide Is High.”

1970 – Members of The Grateful Dead were busted on LSD charges.

1967 – Taking time out from filming the promotional film for “Strawberry Fields,” John Lennon bought an 1843 circus poster from a British antique shop. The acts featured on the poster provided him with most of the lyrics for the Beatles song “Being For The Benefit Of Mr. Kite.”

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. The odds of doing THIS are 300,000 million to one. What is it?
A golfer getting a hole-in-one

2. The odds of THIS happening to you are 10 trillion to 1. What is it?
Being struck by a meteorite

3. The odds of doing THIS are 1,023 to 1. What is it?
Flipping a coin “head’s up” 10 times in a row.

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