COUPLE MAKES DEODORANT OUT OF WHISKEY
Pit Liquor.
CAR WASH WORKER DRIVES OFF WITH CAR
A clean getaway.
WOMAN STAGES HER OWN SON'S DUI SCENE
Stuck him behind the wheel, passed out.
TEACHER WHO FED PUPPY TO TURTLE CHARGED
Science is cool, er, cruel, kids.
DUI SUSPECT DRANK WINE, JUST LIKE JESUS
Or so she says.
ROBBER TAKES PEANUT BUTTER, WINDOW SCREEN
Something here doesn’t mesh.
BRIDE LOSES BET; HUSBAND WEARS EAGLES JERSEY AT WEDDING
Eagles won the Super Bowl.
AUDIO: WOMAN HAD METH IN HER ACCORDION
Not a euphemism.