YOUR DAD, SCULPTED IN CHEESE, FOR FATHER’S DAY
Sorry, too late to enter.
COUNTRIES THAT HAVE THE MOST SEX PRODUCE THE MOST NOBEL PRIZEWINNERS
“No balls, no Nobels,” says Professor Dutton.
DOLPHINS: THEY HAVE NAMES, THEY HOLD HANDS
And those are just the boys.
SURVEY: ONE IN TEN WILL CHECK PHONE DURING SEX
Textus interruptus.
THE LOCKDOWN SONG, FOR KINDERGARTENERS
Everybody sing!
AUDIO: SMART PEOPLE WEAR GLASSES
Maybe. Possibly.
AMERICA’S DREAM HOME
Beach house. No neighbors.
SECOND GRADER: “I HATE MY MOM’S PHONE”
Pay attention to meeee.
AMERICANS FEAR WHAT’S IN THEIR HOT DOGS
Don’t tell us what’s in it.
ENTENMANN’S SEEKS CHIEF DONUT OFFICER
Good: Donuts. Bad: Entenmann’s.