ALLIGATOR PULLED FROM NEW JERSEY RIVER

There have long been jokes about alligators in the sewers of New York City, but officials actually pulled a real alligator from the Passaic River in northern New Jersey. A man fishing for carp in the river called police shortly after 8 a.m. Wednesday to report the gator. Luis Acosta thought it was a snapping turtle at first, but then saw its body. Police and state wildlife officials spent several hours tracking the dangerous reptile before they were finally able to capture it around noon. It was not immediately clear what will happen to the Passaic River gator, which officials said was 4 to 7 feet long.
* 4 to 7 feet long? Not “4 to 4-and-a-half-feet”? Not “6 or 7 feet”? There’s a big difference between 4 and 7 feet,
* Said the gator after it was pulled out of the Passaic River, “Oh, thank god!”
* Maybe “Swamp People” can be like NCIS and start another show in New Jersey.
* The gator had been living off a diet of carp and dead gangsters.
* Now the gator wants to be put in the witness protection program.
* The Passaic River Gators? Sounds like a bluegrass band.