TURTLE THROUGH THE WINDSHIELD

In Florida, a turtle crashed through Nicole Bjanes’ windshield as she was driving at about 75 miles an hour on I-4 in Deltona last Monday afternoon. Miraculously, the turtle and the driver both walked – and, in the turtle’s case, swam – away mostly unscathed. A vehicle in front of Bjanes’ ran over the 12-inch turtle, throwing it into the air. The reptile came flying through her windshield, bounced off the passenger seat, and then landed on her dashboard. Bjanes was treated at the scene for minor cuts by EMS. The turtle was placed in a pond adjacent to the interstate and swam away unharmed.
* Oh, great – there goes the proof for the insurance claim.
* Sure, the first driver could have waited for the turtle to cross the highway, but who’s got all day?
* Sounds like the turtle was neither ninja, teenaged, nor mutant.
* Now his turtle friends don’t believe he flew through the air.
* Or that humans live inside big metal shells, too.
* The turtle was last seen heading for a Shell station.
* The driver admitted going 75 miles an hour? Why admit something like that if you don’t have to?
* Not that the turtle would have been able to get out of the way.
* See? Evolution knew that one day turtles would be in this situation.
* I can imagine the turtle swimming away. I can also imagine the turtle swimming around 10 feet and then dying later.