STUMPY'S HATCHET HOUSE

A new business in Eatontown, New Jersey, combines beer and hatchet-throwing. Stumpy’s Hatchet House is the first indoor hatchet throwing venue in the United States. The idea came from two couples, Kelly and Stuart Josberger, and Trish and Mark Oliphant. The couples were hanging out in the backyard chopping up firewood, and then they start throwing a hatchet at a dead tree. The next thing you know we were trying to see who could do it the best, and then next weekend they were back again throwing the hatchet. “We just felt there was a kind of need for this type of a business,” said Trish Oliphant. It took the two couples about a year to find a suitable space. “We talked to a lot of landlords, and they were like, ‘Yeah, no thank you,'” Mark Oliphant said. “A lot of people say, ‘Hatchets and beer, that sounds really dangerous,’ ” Kelly Josberger said. “First of all, we take safety really seriously, and we also reserve the right to remove people who are drinking too much and not following the rules.” Visitors go through hatchet-throwing training and sign waivers. Each group receives two solid steel 14-inch hatchets. From there, they learned the different games they could play at the pits.
* Bikers welcome!
* The place has an inordinate amount of employees named Lefty.
* Hatchet games? There are lots of hatchet games:
– Find the Fingers!
– Hackey Hack
– Simon Says…or Else!
– Tic-Tac-Where’s My Toes?
– Duck, Duck…Duck
* What they need are hatchet boys, like ball boys in tennis, to run out and retrieve the hatchets. Young kids would be perfect. Young kids with ADD.
* I love it when they say, “We take safety really seriously.”
* Yeah? Well we take danger really seriously too.
* Then they say they’ll remove anyone who drinks too much. Anyone else see the problem with that?
* The problem with tossing out any bad actors is A.) they’re drunk and B.) They’re armed with a hatchet.