MAN SHOOTS SON IN THE BUTT OVER ORANGE JUICE

A Baton Rouge, Louisiana, man was arrested early Sunday after he confessed to shooting his 18-year-old son in the buttocks during an argument over orange juice. Eldridge Dukes, 58, and his son were fighting about the lack of orange juice in the home. The squabble escalated when the son broke a porcelain vase, and Dukes grabbed his .357 caliber handgun and chased his son out of the house and down the street, firing at least three times. He hit his son once in the buttocks. The son was taken to the hospital with non-life-threatening injuries. Dukes was booked for attempted manslaughter and illegal use of a dangerous weapon.
* Is there no end to the trouble OJ has caused?
* The argument ended over orange juice, but I bet it started with leggo my Eggo.
* Non-life-threatening injuries? Try telling that to this guy’s butt.
* You get hit in the butt with a 357 and you’re going to be watching the rest of March Madness standing up.
* Their family name is the Dukes? Do we even have to add the Dukes of Hazzard part?
* Let’s be fair: It is nice when family members take the time to have breakfast together.
* Usually we’re in such a hurry to get out the door in the morning that we don’t have time to get in an argument and fire off a few rounds at a family member.