WEDNESDAY, Sept 4 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR WEDNESDAY, September 4, 2024
(Print button is at bottom of post. To print with larger type, cut and paste content into a document, and print that document.)

COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: A & M AUTOLAND – Scratch And Dent Sale

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

NATIONAL MACADAMIA NUT DAY

NATIONAL WILDLIFE DAY
The National Day Calendar website says this:
“National Wildlife Day is an opportunity to learn more about endangered species, preservation and conservation efforts around the world. Zoos, aviaries, and marine sanctuaries provide a variety of ways to get involved. From participating in presentations and volunteering to fundraise for rehabilitation services, these facilities have something for everyone to learn.” Founded in memory of Steve Irwin, who was killed by a stingray on this date in 2006 while on location to film a segment for the documentary series “Ocean’s Deadliest.”

NEWSPAPER CARRIER DAY
The Holiday Insights website says this:
“This day commemorates the hiring of the very first newspaper carrier. On September 10, 1833, 10-year-old Barney Flaherty became the first newspaper carrier. Benjamin Day, publisher of The New York Sun, hired Barney Flaherty to sell papers for his penny press. For years, this job was primarily populated by kids. Now, few kids deliver papers anymore except in small towns. Many newspapers have shut down. But the ‘Carrier Day’ tradition lives. This job is now largely held by adults, many of them delivering the paper from their cars.”

September is:

Baby Safety Month
Better Breakfast Month
Chicken Month
Classical Music Month
Hispanic Heritage Month
Honey Month
Little League Month
National Piano Month
Self Improvement Month

THE BUZZTHE WILDEST FOOD SOLD AT NFL STADIUMS

Here are some of the wildest foods sold in NFL stadiums that fans will be regurgitating this football season:
– The Pizza Burger: Dallas Cowboys / AT&T Stadium: A hamburger in between two 6-inch mini-pepperoni pizzas as buns.
– Cotton Candy Burritto: Arizona Cardinals / State Farm Stadium: A tube made of cotton candy, inside are M&Ms, jimmie sprinkes, Fruit Loops, Lucky Charms marshmallows, and the whole thing is deep-fried.
– Cannonball Burger: Tampa Bay Buccaneers / Raymond James Stadium: Inside the bun is cheese and fried onions. On top of the bun is a round mound of meat, topped with a pickle and ketchup.
– Red Zone Burger: Kansas City Chiefs / Arrowhead Stadium: An eight-ounce black Angus short rib patty, chili-spiced slab bacon, mac and cheese friend onion, black lava salt and lettuce, with cheddar cheese spread – that’s what’s between the buns; on top are two chicken wings.
– Cannoli Nachos: Philadelphia Eagles / Lincoln Financial Field: Nacho chips topped with Valrhona chocolate, whipped ricotta, diced strawberries, strawberry pearls, pistachio dust, caramel sauce, espresso dirt, and topped with micro mint, lemon and donut sugar.
– The Monster Slice: Jacksonville Jaguars / Everbank Stadium: An 18-inch long slice of pizza.
– Bad Blood Waffle Fries: Buffalo Bills / Highmark Stadium: A two-foot long tray of fries. Half is topped with Buffalo chicken and blue cheese while the other half is topped with BBQ pork, cole slaw and pickles.
– All-Berries Waffle: Dallas Cowboys / AT&T Stadium: A waffle topped with Trix cereal, strawberry syrup and whipped cream.
– T-Rex Cookie: Minnesota Vikings / U.S. Bank Stadium: A giant cookie, 20 inches in diameter.
* And yet they won’t let you in the stadium with a bottle of Pepto-Bismal.
* Make sure you drink a diet soda, to keep your calorie count down.
* I’ve put on five pounds just reading this story.
* It’s like they collect all the uneaten food from the state fair and say, “We’ll get rid of this junk for ya.”

PUMPKIN SPICE HAIR

It’s fall, which means the annual return of all things Pumpkin Spice. But this year, there’s another twist: pumpkin spice hair. It’s a hair coloring treatment. The trend is already taking off on TikTok. Jason Collier, hair stylist to the stars, says: “Pumpkin Spice hair is a multidimensional color that combines deep copper, burnt orange, and warm cinnamon tones, sitting perfectly between mid-blonde and light brunette, creating a look that’s both vibrant and cozy—just like that first sip of a Pumpkin Spice Latte. The color also plays wonderfully with curls and texture, adding depth and a 3D effect that’s both natural and eye-catching.”
* And delicious.
* You can tell someone has pumpkin spice hair ’cause of all the flies.
* I’d try it, but I want to start small. Maybe just Pumpkin Spice my eyebrows.
* I’m not crazy about the smell of Pumpkin Spice, but at least it isn’t Old Spice.
* How is Pumpkin Spice not the missing sixth member of the Spice Girls?

U.S. NEWS

BEDBUGS CRAWL OUT OF STUDENT COMPUTERS

A North Carolina high school had to tell students to bring back their district-issued laptops after bedbugs were spotted crawling out of the devices. The bedbugs had infested the media center at Riverside High School, where the Google Chromebooks were stored over the summer. The laptops were given to kids at freshman orientation in late August. Soon after came complaints about bedbugs in the computers. The school has asked for the electronics back so they and the entire media center can be fumigated.
* If you want to get rid of bedbugs, you have to start from scratch.
* That’ll keep ’em from sleeping in class, huh?
* Bedbugs in the Chromebooks. That bites.
* I thought they work out the bugs during beta testing.
* I hear Apple computers are infested with bookworms.

AUDIO: MANY PEOPLE CAN’T BURP. NOW THERE’S A CURE.

Do you suffer from retrograde cricopharyngeus dysfunction? Maybe you know it as “no-burp syndrome” – an inability to burp. The syndrome is caused by a quirk in the muscle that acts as the gatekeeper to the esophagus. The same muscle that lets food move down won’t let air move up. The inability to belch can cause bloating, pain, gurgling in the neck and chest, and excessive flatulence as built-up air seeks an alternate exit route. Thankfully, there is a cure. Back in 2019 an Illinois doctor developed a procedure, which involves injecting 50 to 100 units of Botox — more than twice the amount often used to smooth forehead wrinkles — into the upper cricopharyngeal muscle. Doctors are now charging anywhere from $4,000 to $25,000 for the treatment.
* Depending on how high their malpractice insurance payments are.
* At last, we can give people their god-given right to burp the alphabet.
* Great. Here comes a whole new batch of Big Pharma TV commercials.
* Pity these poor people who can’t express to their Chinese hosts how much they enjoyed their dinner!
* Unlike most medical procedures, they say this one’s a gas.
CLIP: A burp.
CLIP URL: morningsidekick(dot)com/prep/wp-content/uploads/LongBurp-27seconds(dot)mp3
CLIP: In case you need it, a fart.
CLIP URL: morningsidekick(dot)com/prep/wp-content/uploads/FartSound(dot)mp3

NASA: IT’S THE END OF THE WORLD AND THEY KNOW IT

NASA has used advanced astronomical studies to calculate the timeline for the eventual extinction of all life on our planet. That would be Earth. Here’s what’s going to happen:
– As the Sun continues to burn, it becomes slightly hotter and brighter each year. This will cause a rise in Earth’s surface temperature. Over time, this will cause a cascade of intense heatwaves, prolonged droughts, and the eventual evaporation of our oceans.
– In what’s called the “moist runaway greenhouse effect,” more water will evaporate from the oceans, filling the atmosphere with water vapor. This process will trap more heat, accelerating global warming and pushing Earth’s climate beyond the threshold that can support life. (* “Oh, the humidity!!!”)
– Given this inevitability, according to NASA’s calculations, life on Earth has about 1.5 billion years left.
* I hope it’s a Monday, I’d hate to lose a weekend.
* But did they remember to figure in Leap Days?
* As if this wasn’t bad enough, Social Security will go broke the week before.
* So should I bother getting involved in this “Rings of Power” show, or are we not gonna be around for the end of it?

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

VENEZUELA’S PRESIDENT DECLARES CHRISTMAS STARTS IN OCTOBER

Venezuelan strongman president, Nicolás Maduro – who, it can safely be said, stole his recent election – made an announcement that this year’s Christmas festivities would begin in October. While citizens are protesting and the government cracks down on dissidents, Maduro said during a speech: It’s September and it already feels like Christmas. So this year – as a way of paying tribute to you and thanking you – I’m going to decree that Christmas be brought forward to October 1st.”
* Oh, man… Hacienda Depot still has a warehouse full of unsold 12-foot skeletons.
* Does this mean December 17 is St Patrick’s Day?
* And when should they do their Black Friday shopping?
* Santa released a statement saying “Oh HELL no!!!”
* This sounds shocking until you remember that a lot of big box stores already have their Christmas crap out.

TRENDING

ELTON JOHN’S EYE INFECTION

Elton John has revealed his struggles with a severe infection that has affected his vision. In a message shared on social media, the singer shared that throughout the summer, he has “been dealing with a severe eye infection,” leaving him with “only limited vision in one eye.” He writes, “I am healing, but it’s an extremely slow process” and it will take some time before sight returns to the impacted eye. He also thanked “the excellent team of doctors and nurses,” as well as his family, “who have taken such good care of [him] over the last several weeks.”

ELLE MACPHERSON TREATING BREAST CANCER HOLISTICALLY

Supermodel Elle Macpherson is sharing her breast cancer diagnosis for the first time in her upcoming memoir, “Elle: Life, Lessons, and Learning to Trust Yourself.” She says she received the diagnosis over 7 years ago, and she’s rejecting conventional treatment. She says that she was advised to get a mastectomy with radiation, in addition to chemotherapy and hormone therapy, but chose to pursue an “intuitive, heart-led, holistic approach” instead … refusing to undergo chemo and surgery, as it sounded “too extreme.” She says, “Saying no to standard medical solutions was the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life. But saying no to my own inner sense would have been even harder.”

ROCK & ROLL HALL OF FAME FAN VOTES: IRON MAIDEN IN THE LEAD

While the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame already has their inductees for 2024, the museum has a kiosk set up where visitors can vote for who they think should be on the ballot next year. Currently leading at the museum’s “Voice Your Choice” voting kiosk, Iron Maiden is solidly in the lead, followed by Blink-182, Styx, “Weird Al” Yankovic, Motley Crue, Weezer, Boston, Pink, Snoop Dogg and Linkin Park. The winner of this survey doesn’t automatically make the list; it’s just a popularity contest so the Hall of Fame nominating committee knows who the fans might like to see inducted into the Hall of Fame.

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

Sept. 11, Wednesday – Patriot Day
Sept. 20, Friday – National POW/MIA Recognition Day (The third Friday of September)
Sept. 23, Sunday – Fall begins (Autumn Equinox is 8:44 a.m. EDT)
Oct. 14, Monday – Columbus Day
Oct. 16, Wednesday – National Boss’s Day
Oct. 31, Thursday – Halloween

BIRTHDAYS

Kyle Mooney (comedian, “Saturday Night Live”) … 40
Beyoncé Knowles (singer) … 43
Max Greenfield (actor, “The Neighborhood”, “New Girl”) … 45
Damon Wayans (actor, “Lethal Weapon”) … 64
Kim Thayil (guitarist with Soundgarden) … 64
Khandi Alexander (actress, “Scandal”, “CSI Miami”) … 67
Martin Chambers (drummer with the Pretenders) … 73

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“I guess I’m a daredevil. I guess that’s my dangerous side, I like to jump off boats and cliffs and things like that!”

(A) Lester Holt
(B) Jean Smart
(C) Beyoncé

ANSWER: (C) Beyoncé

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2019 – The Federal Trade Commission fined YouTube $170 million for illegally collecting data on children’s viewing habits.
* And that put an end to that!

2018 – Amazon became America’s second trillion dollar company.
* You know what they ship more of than anything else? Cardboard boxes.

2007 – Toy maker Mattel Inc. recalled 800,000 lead-tainted, Chinese-made toys worldwide, a third major recall in just over a month.
* So the Chinese removed the lead and put it in paint.

2006 – “Crocodile Hunter” Steve Irwin, 44, died after a stingray’s barb pierced his heart.
* Should have stuck with crocodiles.

1998 – Larry Page and Sergey Brin, two students at Stanford University, founded Google.
* Guess how I found this information. C’mon – guess.

1894 – Some 12,000 tailors in New York City went on strike to protest the existence of sweatshops.
* So the corporations moved the sweatshops overseas.

1888 – George Eastman patented the Kodak camera, the first to use film sold in rolls.
* Film sold by George Eastman. He was no dummy.

1885 – The first cafeteria opened in New York City.
* And yeah, that’s still the same original piece of blueberry pie sitting there now under that glass.

1781 – Los Angeles was founded by 44 people.
* It would have been an even 50 people, but the other six were stuck in traffic.

1609 – Navigator Henry Hudson discovered the island of Manhattan.
* He knew he was close by the number of bodies floating in the river.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2022 – A judge dismissed a lawsuit brought by Spencer Elden, then 31, against Nirvana over the band’s iconic 1991 album cover which showed Elden as a baby swimming naked in a pool towards a dollar bill pierced with a fish hook. Elden said his appearance on the front of the Nevermind record constituted child sexual abuse, but the judge said he waited too long to claim he had been exploited.

2015 – Rolling Stones’ guitarist Keith Richards told The New York Daily News that rap music was for “tone deaf people.” He went on to say “All they need is a drum beat and somebody yelling over it and they’re happy. There’s an enormous market for people who can’t tell one note from another.”

2012 – One Direction won a legal dispute over the right to keep using their band name. A U.S. punk group of the same name challenged the UK boyband, saying that they had called themselves One Direction first. One Direction U.S. had sued the British band for $1 million in damages and asked for a share of their royalties. Having lost their court battle, One Direction U.S. changed their name to Uncharted Shores.

2002 – Kelly Clarkson became the first winner of “American Idol”.

1986 – After just getting his driving license back after a five-year suspension, Gregg Allman from The Allman Brothers Band was arrested in Florida for drunk driving.

1976 – The Bee Gees went to No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with ‘You Should Be Dancing’, the group’s third U.S. No.1. It was this song that launched the trio into Disco stardom and is the first chart-topper in which Barry Gibb used his trademark falsetto.

1965 – The Who had their equipment van stolen while purchasing a guard dog at Battersea Dog’s Home in England.

1962 – The Beatles had their first formal recording session, at EMI’s Abbey Road studios. While the band had committed several songs to tape on June 6, producer George Martin was not thrilled with the results, so he asked the band back into the studio to try again. This time, they recorded six songs, including “Love Me Do” and “Please Please Me.” The occasion also marked drummer Ringo Starr’s first ever session with the band.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. 33% of women surveyed say they would change THIS about themselves. What is it?
Their laugh

2. 54% of women surveyed say they’d rather have THIS than a new diamond ring. What is it?
A maid

3. Women own three times as many of THESE as they did in 1999, and the average number is 34. What are they?
Pairs of undies

(c) 2024
MORNING SIDEKICK RADIO SHOW PREP & COMEDY
8062 West Massey Circle
Littleton, CO 80128
USA
morningsidekick(at)gmail(dot)(com)
Tel: 303-727-9111