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Today Is…

FRIDAY – July 17

THURSDAY – July 16

WEDNESDAY – July 15

Anything special being celebrated or commemorated today? Find out here!

TODAY’S ALMANAC

FRIDAY ALMANAC – July 17

THURSDAY ALMANAC – July 16

WEDNESDAY ALMANAC – July 15

Birthdays, Upcoming Holidays, This Day in History and Music

TODAY’S TRIVIA

FRIDAY TRIVIA – July 17

THURSDAY TRIVIA – July 16

WEDNESDAY TRIVIA – July 15

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three obscure facts.

ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES

“THE ODYSSEY” IN IMAX: ONLY 25 THEATERS

And they’re all sold out.

DISNEY REBOOTS MICKEY MOUSE CLUB

And doing it without a net.

“TODAY SHOW” INTRUDER LUNGES AT CRAIG MELVIN

Who coulda forecast this, right Al Roker?

WHAT TO WATCH – New and Returning Shows and Movies

Premiering Thursday through Sunday

MONOPOLY: THE TV SHOW

Not a CHANCE I’ll be watching this.

WORLD CUP AI PREDICTOR IS DEAD ON

They all laughed.

WHAT TO WATCH – New and Returning Shows and Movies

Premiering Monday through Wednesday

WHAT TO WATCH – New and Returning Shows and Movies

Premiering Thursday through Sunday

THE IDEAL LENGTH FOR A MOVIE: 88 MINUTES

Or half an Odyssey.

JOKE OF THE DAY

Suggestion: Post the joke on your website. Boost clicks by having listeners call in and tell the Joke of the Day to win a prize.

A wife was giving birth and having a difficult time with it.

posted July 16
Her husband said “I’m sorry you’re in such pain. I wish I could help.” She says, “It’s OK. It’s not your fault.”

Why do ballerinas love the number four?

posted July 15
Tutus.

Wife is out in the backyard, pulling weeds in the hot sun.

posted July 15
Husband comes out, says, “What’s for dinner?” She’s a little angry. She says, “Pretend I’m out of town, go make dinner yourself.” Guy goes inside, cooks up a beautiful steak, baked potato and a beer. Wife comes in. Says, “Where’s my dinner?” Husband says, “I thought you were out of town.”

What do cannibals eat instead of sushi?

posted July 14
Ramen.

Woman finds her husband sobbing.

posted July 13
She asks what’s the matter, Husband says, “My mom just died.” Wife says, Oh, I sorry, honey.” He says, “Maybe you can tell me a joke to cheer me up.” She goes, “OK. Knock knock.” Husband says, “Who’s there”? Wife says, “Not your mother.”

U.S. NEWS

STANDARD TIME VS. DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME

A long time coming.

MAN RESCUED FROM PORTA POTTY – TRAPPED UNDER THE SEAT

Perhaps he misunderstood the instructions.

SCHOOL TO BE FIRST TO GET HUMANOID ROBOT TEACHER

Danger, Will Robinson!

CAT LEADS COPS TO SUSPECT

Cat —-> Burglar

FLORIDA WOMAN GETS TERRIFIC LICENSE PLATE

SQZ-A55.

MILITARY TO BEGIN TESTOSTERONE CHECKS

This is perfectly ok.

TEXAS WOMAN FLOODS APARTMENT PRACTICING POLE DANCING

There are easier ways to wash down the pole.

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

WOMAN CAUGHT SMUGGLING PYTHON IN HER BRA

Snakes in a Bra on a Plane.

WORLD CUP: A STRANGE COINCIDENCE

Lionel Messi (ARG) once gave Lamine Yamal (ESP) a bath.

BEAR STEALS GOLFER’S CLUBS

That’s a gimme.

BRITISH AIR CREW PARTIES HARD BEFORE FLIGHT

Can you blame them?

MAN PARTIALLY SUCKED OUT OF AIRPLANE WINDOW

Oh, Boeing, you’ve done it again, you little scamp.

MUSEUM SPREADS PEANUT BUTTER ON THE FLOOR TO HONOR LATE ARTIST

Vincent Van Skippy.

SKELETON IN A WETSUIT WASHES UP ON SHORE

Gnarly, brah.

MAN SURVIVES LION ATTACK BY PETTING IT

Who’s a good girl?

FUNNY PICTURES

Right-click on images to
Copy or Save.

Being A Model Must Be So Glamourous

posted July 16

You Know They Designed It This Way

posted July 16

Yes, But It’s Still Broccoli

posted July 15

Give It To The Floating Guy, Dummy!

posted July 15

Before Photobombing, There Was Paintingbombing

posted July 14

Merge Traffic Ahead

posted July 14

THE BUZZ

SPIDER SPEEDS

There’s one on your shoulder right now.

MY CHEAP PARENTS

Tightwads.

DUMB HEADLINES

Have listeners vote for the dumbest.

AHH, THE RICH

The stinkin’ rich.

FALLING ASLEEP TO MUSIC

Zzzzzz.

ANNOYING PHRASES

These ones.

THE MOST PEACEFUL COUNTRY ON EARTH: ICELAND

Niceland.

DUMBEST EXCUSE FOR A BREAKUP

Typical Logan.

TRENDING

CHLOE FINEMAN LEAVING “SNL”

DAYTIME EMMY AWARD NOMINATIONS

WEEKEND BOX OFFICE (July 10-12)

LUKE BRYAN KNOWS WHAT COUNTRY MUSIC SMELLS LIKE

2026 EMMY NOMINATIONS

GARTH BROOKS ANNOUNCES ARENA TOUR

WEEKEND BOX OFFICE (July 3-5)

VICTOR WILLIS, LEAD SINGER OF VILLAGE PEOPLE, DEAD AT 74

NEW MOVIES

Click on name for details and audio clips

THE ODYSSEY

Starts Friday, July 17 in theaters.

MOANA

Starts Friday, July 10 in theaters.

EVIL DEAD BURN

Starts Friday, July 10 in theaters.

THE INVITE

Starts Friday, July 10 in theaters.

Click on the title to go to an mp3 player. To download the mp3, right-click on the player and choose the “Save audio as” option.

THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS

For Friday, July 17.

BROUGHT TO YOU BY

Funny fake sponsorship announcements

A & M AUTOLAND – Christmas In July

‘Tis the season to be stupid.

THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS

For Friday, July 10,

PROMOS-TO-GO

Pre-produced ready-to-use show bumper donuts

A & M AUTOLAND- The Bed Bunker

If at first you don’t succeed – at selling cars – try selling something else.

LAWN DIRECTOR

Be the first on your block to have a blockbuster lawn.

THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS

For Friday, July 3.

BROUGHT TO YOU BY

Funny fake sponsorship announcements

A & M AUTOLAND – 4th of July

Big Mike wishes he could declare independence – from Big Al.

NEWSSTAND FIREWORKS 2026

Explosive headlines!

BI-PARTISAN BIDET (CLEAN VERSION)

Stay clean no matter which way you lean!

BI-PARTISAN BIDET (UNCENSORED VERSION)

Warning: This is the naughty version.

THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS

For Friday, June 26.

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