TUESDAY, Apr 23 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR TUESDAY, April 23, 2024
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TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

LOVERS DAY

NATIONAL ZUCCHINI BREAD DAY

WORLD LABORATORY DAY
The Holiday Insights website says this:
“World Laboratory Day celebrates the place where great discoveries, inventions, and medical cures are born. Its also where mad scientists dwell. Perhaps the most well known thing to come out of laboratory was … Frankenstein! Countless ideas, concepts and theories are tested in laboratories. Most of the world’s greatest medical treatments and cures were discovered and perfected in laboratories, after endless study and testing. Products coming out of laboratories have helped and aided mankind in many, many ways. Celebrate World Laboratory Day by learning more about how they work. If you chance across a laboratory worker (or mad scientist) today, wish them a Happy World Laboratory Day.”

April is:

Adopt a Greyhound Month
Car Care Month
Celebrate Diversity Month
D.E.A.R Drop Everything and Read Month
International Guitar Month
Jazz Appreciation Month
Keep America Beautiful Month
National Card and Letter Writing Month
National Garden Month
National Humor Month
National Poetry Month

THE BUZZOUTDATED LEARNING

Reddit asked: “What’s one thing people were taught in school back in the day that is totally wrong or outdated now?”
– “The food pyramid.”
– “There are two Germanys.”
– “That you needed eight pieces of bread and 4 glasses of milk every single day in order to be healthy.”
– “The different taste zones on the tongue. It’s not true.”
– “Some of our maps still had 2 Germany, in 2001.”
– “That your veins look blue because blood is blue before receiving oxygen.”
– “If we went swimming in a pool at the same time as boys, we would get pregnant. This was Catholic school in the 90’s.”
– “In third grade we were taught square dancing all year. I can still do it, but have never used it in the 50 years since.”
– “If you ignore them, they’ll get bored and stop teasing you.”
– “Don’t drink before, during, or after running, you’ll get cramps. Leading to a lot of dehydrated kids on cross country day.”
– “You have to learn math because you won’t just have a calculator in your pocket at all times.”
PHONE TOPIC: What did they teach you in school that is wrong now?

SHOCK STUDY: MEN LIKE PRETTY WOMEN; OTHER WOMEN GET JEALOUS

Researchers in Tel Aviv did a study to see how a woman’s appearance impacts the moral behavior of others. They found that men and women react differently to highly attractive women than less attractive women: The men will be more truthful to an attractive face; the women will be less truthful. Researchers gave 110 men and women a questionnaire with an image of a woman attached, and falsely told participants it was the face of the scientist leading the study. Half of the questionnaires featured the image of a typically attractive woman, and the other half had a picture of a less attractive woman. The results showed that men were more likely to behave more honestly when they believed they were interacting with a beautiful woman while the opposite pattern was seen in the women – they exhibited “a beauty penalty toward attractive women,” study authors wrote. The study was published in the Journal of Economic Behavior & Organization
* It was also published in Catfight Monthly.
* How “less attractive” was the less attractive woman, on a scale of 1 to John Malkovich? (or your favorite not-beautiful actor or celebrity)
* Sure, Tel Aviv, do a study that brings a little more tension to the Middle East.
* A beauty penalty. Boy, don’t I know THAT feeling.

HEAT ALERT SYSTEM ADDS A NEW COLOR: MAGENTA!

The National Weather Service and the Centers for Disease Control have updated the heat warning color chart. The lowest color is white – no heat problem. Then it goes up to yellow, orange, and red, which is used when there are medical risk factors from the heat. But now, they’ve added something higher than red – Magenta! Magenta is the worst and deadliest heat threat category, and it means you are in a “long-duration extreme heat activity with little to no overnight relief.”
* So red means you could die; magenta means you’ll die a slow-cooked death.
* Great, more colors for the local TV news. They love saying “It’s a Magenta Alert Day!” and then taking three more minutes to explain what “magenta alert” means, instead of just telling you it’s hot.
* The final color after Magenta will be “Bursts into flames.”
* “But isn’t red the highest?” “Yes, but this chart goes to Magenta. It’s one more hotter than the hottest.” Where have I heard that before?

U.S. NEWS

FLORIDA COUPLE TRIED TO FORGE LOTTERY TICKET

A Florida couple was caught trying to pass off a fake lottery ticket as a million dollar winner. Kira Enders and her boyfriend Dakota Jones allegedly had taped together two tickets that had been ripped horizontally with the top half of one ticket and the bottom half another. The faked ticket showed a $1 million prize winner. They told officials they found the ticket, wet and torn in two, and they dried it out and taped it together. However, each half of the ticket had a different serial number. The two were charged with forgery of a lottery ticket with intent to defraud.
* Not their lucky day, I guess.
* Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time. And that would be the time they were drinking.
* Even worse, the top half was from Powerball and the bottom half was Mega Millions.
* Who rips a $1 million lottery ticket in half? “Only ONE million? Stupid lottery!” r-r-R-I-P!!

WALMART NOW DELIVERS LIVE BAIT

Filling what is obviously a pressing need, Walmart stores in Georgia will now deliver live bait. Walmart is starting the service in Georgia at 154 stores in the state. The new service offers live bait pickup and delivery from 6 a.m. to 10 p.m., bringing the bait anywhere with a deliverable address, including docks.
* “I just need one more worm and I can catch that fish.” This is like Walmart delivering quarters to you while you’re standing at a slot machine.
* Talk about clickbait! You just click, and here comes your bait.
* “Hey! I ordered moth larvae and you brought me earthworms! That’s bait-and-switch!”
* And if you don’t need your live bait delivered, you can still find it in the Walmart dairy section, next to the yogurt.
* This isn’t going to work. I bet Walmart tries to wriggle out of it.

AUDIO: DRUNK BUZZARDS

An animal rescue group in Connecticut helped out a pair of drunk vultures. The shelter, A Place Called Hope, said in a Facebook post that the buzzards had been “dumpster diving” and ended up eating something fermented enough to cause severe intoxication, probably old fruit. At first they were thought to be seriously ill, but testing confirmed they were merely “too drunk to fly.” The birds were given fluids and an overnight stay, and then fed a big breakfast the next day before being released back into the wild, and they successfully rejoined their colony.
* “Too drunk to fly.” We’ve covered stories like that about pilots.
* All during their overnight stay, they kept trying to sneak out to get tattoos.
* Were they really drunk off old fruit, or were they feasting on Shia LaBeouf?
* A hungover buzzard. I’ve been there, pal.
CLIP: How do you tell a drunk buzzard? They sound like this. Beaky Buzzard’s “Loop-a-Doop” song.
CLIP URL: morningsidekick(dot)com/prep/wp-content/uploads/BeakyBuzzard-LoopADoopSong(dot)mp3

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

TEEN FINDS SNAIL IN MCDONALD’S CHICKEN SANDWICH

A Welsh teenager was horrified after she bit into a McDonald’s chicken sandwich and felt a crunch, and then something moving. Sachey Nurse – her actual name, apparently – was eating a McCrispy Deluxe when she felt an unexpected crunch that turned out to be a snail, “alive and moving.” Sachey immediately returned the contaminated meal to the store, where she was told they would report the incident to their supplier. She also reported the issue to JustEat which delivered her order. Sachey said, “I was disgusted. I’d never return to this McDonald’s.”
* “THIS McDonald’s.” Don’t you love the qualifier?
* Just before the crunch, she heard a little voice say “I’m lovin’ it!”
* It’s the McCrispy DELUXE. If you don’t want escargot, you order the McCripsy REGULAR. Sheesh.
* Besides, she’s from Wales. This can’t possibly be the worst thing she’s ever eaten.
* Snails? Isn’t McDonald’s supposed to be fast food?

AUSTRALIAN EMERGENCY ROOMS: LEAVE YOUR SNAKES AT HOME

Emergency rooms in Australia are asking snakebite victims to NOT bring the snake that bit them to the ER. In Queensland’s Wide Bay region, doctors have come face to face with some of the world’s most venomous snakes captured by patients believing it’ll help with identification and treatment. In one case earlier this month, emergency staff at Bundaberg Hospital were handed a plastic food container with an extremely venomous eastern brown snake inside peering back at them. Doctors say they are not trained to identify snakes, and medical staff did not need to see the snake to know how to treat the patient.
* And this goes double for crocodile bites.
* If you want a doctor to see the snake, go get yourself treated by a veterinarian.
* “Come on! We’ve got to get you to the emergency room!” “Wait – I can’t decide between Tupperware or Rubbermaid.”
* These ERs could have a pretty good side hustle going if they’d open up a taxidermy service.

TRENDING

LUKE BRYAN FALLS ON STAGE

Country star Luke Bryan took a bad fall onstage at the Coast City Country festival in Vancouver, Canada, on Saturday after slipping on a fan’s cellphone. Despite the 47-year-old country singer falling on his back, he laughed about the incident and asked the audience if anyone caught the moment on camera because he wanted to Instagram it. Then he joked, “It’s OK. Hey, my lawyer will be calling.”

NICKI MINAJ HIT BY OBJECT DURING CONCERT

Nicki Minaj has joined the “hit by something thrown by the audience” club. During her Sunday concert in Detroit, Nicki was in the middle of singing “Starships” when an “unidentified item” came her way. Minaj threw up her hand to block it. She then crouched to pick it up before tossing it back into the audience. In recent months, Harry Styles, Bebe Rexha, Ava Max and Kelsea Ballerini have all been hit by things.

OPRAH AND DWAYNE JOHNSON GAVE A TRUCKLOAD OF MONEY TO HAWAIIAN FIRE VICTIMS

A lot of celebrities give money and don’t necessarily publicize it. Some do publicize it as a p.r. move. Some publicize because their name helps raise even more money. When the widlfire destroyed the beachfront neighborhood in Lahaina, Hawaii, last year, two big celebrities stepped up – Oprah Winfrey and Dwayne Johnson announced they had committed $10 million to set up the People’s Fund of Maui, to help victims of the fire. Johnson has strong Hawaiian ties, and Oprah has a large Hawaiian estate. It was recently announced that the fund had raised almost $60 million. The foundation wouldn’t say exactly how much Winfrey and Johnson gave in total, but a list of other contributors indicates the bulk of the 60 million did come from them, and has been dispersed to over 8,000 people who were displaced.

TOM BRADY TO GET ROASTED ON TV SPECIAL

Ex- and possibly future- quarterback Tom Brady will be the target of a new comedy roast on Netflix. “The Greatest Roast of All Time: Tom Brady” will stream live May 5 at 8 p.m. EDT on Netflix. It will be the first live roast in history to air unedited and uncensored. Actor and comedian Kevin Hart will host the special, with comedian Jeff Ross and other “surprise roasters” to poke fun at Brady.

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

May 12, Sunday – Mother’s Day
May 27, Monday – Memorial Day
June 14, Friday – Flag Day
June 16, Sunday – Father’s Day
June 20, Thursday – Summer begins (The June solstice occurs at 4:50 P.M. EST)

BIRTHDAYS

Jesse Lee Soffer (actor, “Chicago P.D.”) … 40
John Oliver (actor, comedian, news commentary host: “Last Week Tonight”) … 47
John Cena (professional wrestler, actor, rapper) … 47
George Lopez (comedian, sitcom actor, talk show host) … 63
Valerie Bertinelli (actress) … 64
Joyce DeWitt (TV actress, “Three’s Company) … 75
Blair Brown (actress, “Orange Is The New Black”, “Tom Clancy’s Jack Ryan”, “Fringe”) … 77
Lee Majors (TV actor, “The Six Million Dollar Man”) … 85

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“Whether you like me or you don’t, I still dig showing up for work.”

(A) Vladimir Putin
(B) Kim Jong-Un
(C) John Cena

ANSWER: (C) John Cena

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2005 – Co-founder Jawed Karim uploaded the first video to YouTube.
* Which was briefly known as MyTube.

2002 – American cardinals opened an extraordinary meeting with top Vatican officials to discuss a sex abuse scandal rocking the Roman Catholic Church in the United States.
* And cleared the whole thing up in a few days.

1992 – McDonald’s opened its first fast-food restaurant in China.
* “Yes, I WOULD like to super-size that, this has to feed my whole family … for a week.”

1985 – New Coke, which flopped, was announced.
* The fellow who came up with this brainstorm is still working on Madison Avenue – washing car windshields at stoplights.

1984 – The world’s first tigon was born in Paris. It was the offspring of a tiger and a lioness.
* Make that a very farsighted tiger.

1975 – The last president of South Vietnam, Nguyen Van Thieu, resigned, condemning the United States.
* You’re welcome.

1972 – Apollo 16 astronauts explored the Moon’s surface. It was the fourth moon landing.
* “Yep, it’s just a bunch of dust and rocks over here, too.”

1896 – The general public saw a motion picture for the first time when the ‘Vitascope’ system projected a film on a screen in a demonstration at the New York City’s Koster & Bial Music Hall.
* “I say! Two pence for a large bucket of popcorn! It’s highway robbery!”

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2016 – Beyoncé released her sixth studio album, “Lemonade,” accompanied by a 65-minute film of the same title. The most acclaimed studio album of Beyoncé’s career to date, the album was nominated for nine Grammy Awards and was the best-selling album of 2016.

2008 – Amy Winehouse went out on a drink and drug-fueled spree and hit and headbutted two men.

2008 – Bon Jovi guitarist Richie Sambora was sentenced to three years probation after admitting to driving under the influence of alcohol.

1995 – Peter Hodgson, from Liverpool, found a tape in his attic containing 16 of The Beatles’ earliest recordings made in 1959. The tape included “Hello Little Girl,” a Lennon-McCartney composition that the Beatles never released, and Ray Charles’ “Hallelujah, I Love Her So.” The sessions had been made on a reel-to-reel recorder that Hodgson’s father had lent to Paul McCartney.

1988 – Whitney Houston smashed a chart record held by The Beatles and The Bee Gees when “Where Do Broken Hearts Go” became her seventh consecutive U.S. No.1 hit.

1975 – Badfinger’s Pete Ham committed suicide by hanging himself in his London garage.

1956 – Elvis Presley played Las Vegas for the first time. Reaction was poor, and he played only one week of a two-week engagement.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. 79% of women know THIS. 19% of men do. What is it?
Their ring size

2. Every year, women buy more of THESE than men do on. What are they?
Flowers

3. Over 5 million American men and over 1 million American women are classified as THIS. What is it?
They’re classified as “tall” – being at least 6’3″ in height.

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