FRIDAY, Oct 13 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR FRIDAY, October 13, 2023
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

INTERNATIONAL DAY FOR FAILURE
The Day For Failure website says this:
“Without the possibility of failure there is no success; they go hand-in-hand. After all, failure means you have grabbed the opportunity to succeed. So let’s celebrate our shortcomings and failures, share our experiences and promote the understanding of failure as a learning experience.”

INTERNATIONAL SKEPTICS DAY
The Cute Calendar website says this:
“International Skeptics Day celebrates true facts and the exposing of wrong ones by being skeptic and asking the right questions. If nobody had ever been skeptic about established facts then people would still believe the earth is flat.”

NATIONAL CHESS DAY

NATIONAL YORKSHIRE PUDDING DAY

October is:

Adopt a Shelter Dog Month
American Cheese Month
Car Care Month
Child Health Month
Consumer Information Month
Cookbook Month
Country Music Month
Fire Prevention Month
National Pizza Month
National Popcorn Month
National Service Dog Month
Vegetarian Awareness Month

ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES

TAYLOR SWIFT MOVIE REVIEWS ARE EXCELLENT

As of yesterday, the reviews of the new Taylor Swift: Eras Tour concert movie are at 100% positive on the Rotten Tomatoes movie review site. Some of the reviews:
– “Filled with both spectacle and strikingly intimate moments, The Eras Tour is almost too much of a good thing.”
– “The film more than justifies the hype. Swift has gifted her fans a spectacular, lovingly crafted movie that somehow captures everything great about the live show.”
– “Three hours of slick, lovingly shot footage of a modern pop star operating at the very peak of her powers.”
– “A bombastic celebration of not only Swift’s musical catalog, but friendship, joy and color that benefits from being on the biggest screen possible.”
– “The sheer spectacle and energy of the her film is enough to convert even the most rabid anti-Swiftie.”
* And every one of those 782 reviews were written by her ex-boyfriends.
* Yeah, like anyone is going to give it a bad review and risk the wrath of the Taylor minions.
* The movie sets another milestone by being the first film since “The Big Chill” to not have a ‘dancing in the kitchen’ scene.
* And Beyoncé’s gonna follow this with her own concert movie? No pressure!

THE BUZZ

IF YOU DIE, YOUR CAT WILL EAT YOU IMMEDIATELY

If you die at home alone your pets will start eating your body “really fast.” This is according to an experienced U.S. coroner named Toby Savoy, a death investigator with the Louisiana coroner’s office. He says that cats especially will waste no time in eating their owners once they’ve died. Toby says, “Dogs will hold out until they have nothing left to eat. But a cat will remove your head in 24 hours. I’m talking literally hair on the floor – no head.” Although he points out that a Lab won’t. “Labs for some reason don’t eat their owners, unless they’re locked in for months I guess they would. But a cat – they smell that odor and they start nibbling.” He says the average cat will wait just “an hour or two” before eating its owner.
* And then, cats will take your teeth and bat them off the bed one at a time.
* So this whole “I’m a finicky eater” pose is just to lure you into a false sense of security.
* I own a cat, and I’m never sleeping in again.
* Rabbits and guinea pigs won’t even wait until you’re dead.

THE MOST SIGNIFICANT CARS IN HISTORY

Automotive website Jalopnik asked readers to nominate “The Most Significant Cars In History.” The criteria is based on their historical significance along with their legacy in the marketplace. Here they are, in no particular order:
– Ford Model T
– Gräf & Stift open-topped touring car. This was the car Grand Duke Franz Ferdinand was assassinated in, which led to World Wars I & II, the Russian Revolution and other horrors of the 20th Century including The Brady Bunch. But it’s a well-made machine.
– Apollo 17 Lunar Rover
– Volkswagen Beetle
– Studebaker US6, a 2½-ton 6×6 truck, which the U.S. Army used to win World War 2
– Toyota AA, the first production Toyota sedan (* No, it didn’t run on double-A batteries)
– Ford Mustang
– Willys Jeep
– Ford Explorer
– Benz Patent Motor Car, actually the very first motorized car, invented in 1886.
– Toyota Prius
– Chevy Corvair, the car that made the world aware that bad car design will kill you.
– Curved Dash Oldsmobile, first car to be mass produced via interchangeable parts.
* And yes, Jay Leno owns one of each of these.
* Who’s Willy, and what makes his Jeep so special?
* No love for Chitty Chitty Bang Bang?
* I was going to vote for the car I first got laid in, but these are all pretty good.

U.S. NEWS

GUY SEES FIRE IN APARTMENT, CALLS 911, IT’S JUST A TV WITH THE YULE LOG CHANNEL

A guy in New York City, named Kieran Knightley (* No, NOT actress Keira Knightley), was looking out his New York apartment window and saw a fire in an apartment across the street. He called 911. The two fire trucks arrived with sirens a-roaring and investigated. They informed Kieran the fire was, in fact, just an 8-foot television playing one of those yule log videos.
* Good job, Magoo.
* Well, now they know who the local window-peeper is.
* Get ready for the Halloween 911 calls about monsters in the neighborhood.
* Did they bust the TV owner for felony Early Christmassing?
* This would make a great commercial: “Our picture is so realistic…”

FLORIDA WOMAN MAKES MOVE TO VIRGINIA FOR JOB, FINDS OUT SHE WAS NOT HIRED

A Florida woman packed up and moved to Virginia for her new job and worked for seven days before finding out she wasn’t actually hired. Camryn Spina, 24, applied this summer for a job as a cheerleading coach at an unnamed college in Virginia. Here’s what happened:
– In June, she interviewed long-distance, and it went really well. She said she then received an email from the coach asking her to visit the college in Virginia. They rented her a car. The interview lasted for five hours. The head coach told her he wanted to hire her. He sent her an email with her job details and expectations.
– Spina received an email from the head coach telling her that she was to start work on August 1 and that she should submit her details to human resources.
– She spoke with the head coach twice a week throughout July to discuss how she would step into the job, and how she would find a place to live once she moved there.
– She rented a moving truck, packed up and drove 13 hours to Virginia.
– After settling into a hotel, she began working August 1 and immediately started coaching about 50 athletes at the college, and doing a lot of official business with the team.
– On August 8, her boss asked her to check whether human resources had received her personal details. HR replied, “Your application is currently under review by the department, and if you are selected to move forward in the hiring process a hiring manager will contact you directly.” Human resources said her application never even reached the stage of a background check.
– On August 10, she was told the college had “decided to move forward with other applicants for this job.”
– She eventually received a check for $1,600 to cover the days worked. It barely covered her moving expenses.
* Welcome to the grown-up world of employment, honey.
* Gimme a U! Gimme an R! Gimme a SCREWED!
* The head coach wanted to hire her – kinda wondering what he did to get on HR’s bad side.
* Maybe one of the college regents looked at the balance sheet and said, “We’re paying WHAT for a cheerleading coach?”
* Now she’s finding it extremely difficult to be cheerful.
* I would have kept her and fired the HR department.

TEACHER FIRED FOR FART JOKE

A teacher in Olathe, Kansas, was fired after making a fart joke on TikTok. Stephen Taylor, who has worked as a teacher for six years along with working as a stand-up comedian, was fired from Mill Creek alternative school in September. In his TikTok videos, Taylor often jokes about farting in the classroom. In one clip, he jokes, “I save up big milky lactose intolerant farts. And I drop bombs silently because I’m an adult and I know my body.” And, he adds, he “crop dusts” his students regularly. A couple of school board members didn’t see the funny side and launched an investigation into the teacher, who insists he has never actually farted on his students. He said, “The reason I’m doing comedy on TikTok is to make money because you only pay me $45,000 a year and I work all the time.” Taylor was asked to remove the videos or be fired. Mr. Taylor chose door Number 2. Before the Olathe School Board voted to fire him, Taylor argued one last time: “You are going to vote at the end of this to fire a teacher who has incredible evaluations, great relationships with students and cares deeply about their success. I am that teacher and this is all because of TikTok.”
* Tough room!
* Social media strikes again.
* That’s a very important lesson, kids. Remember: “This is all because of TikTok.”
* In truth, the kids were complaining because their eyes were watering so badly they couldn’t read the whiteboard.
* It’s Kansas. He could have blamed it on the pig farm next door.
* First rule of comedy: know your audience. And the Kansas School Boards are famous for their sense of humor.

TRENDINGTOP PLASTIC SURGERIES

The American Society of Plastic Surgeons has released its list of the most sought-after cosmetic and reconstructive procedures in 2022, the year with the most recent data. The top five were these:
1. Liposuction (325,669 procedures, up 23% from 2019)
2. Breast augmentation (298,568 procedures, up 4% from 2019)
3. Tummy tuck (161,948 procedures, up 37% from 2019)
4. Breast lift (143,364 procedures, up 30% from 2019)
5. Eyelid surgery (115,261 procedures, up 13% from 2019)

TELETUBBIES “SUN BABY” GROWN UP, PREGNANT

The actress who portrayed the beloved, spooky Sun Baby on the Teletubbies show is now grown up and having a baby of her own. Jessica Smith, who was the face of the baby in the sun when the series began in 1997, shared via Instagram on Wednesday that she’s pregnant with her first child. Back in 2017, Jessica explained how she got the part: She just happened to be at the hospital with her mother at the same time that the producer of the series had come in and wanted the hospital to get in contact with them if they’d seen any smiling babies. (* Girl or boy, she should call the baby ‘Ray.’)

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

Oct. 14, Saturday – Annular Solar Eclipse (ANNULAR*, not ANNUAL)
(* The moon will not completely cover the sun – being farther from Earth it will be slightly smaller, resulting in a “ring of fire” effect)
Oct. 16, Monday – National Boss’s Day
Oct. 31, Tuesday – Halloween
Nov. 5, Sunday – Daylight Saving Time Ends, turn clocks back 1 hour
Nov. 11, Saturday – Veterans Day
Nov. 23, Thursday – Thanksgiving
Dec. 21, Thursday – Winter begins, winter solstice occurs at 10:27 P.M. EST
Dec. 25, Monday – Christmas
Dec. 31, Sunday – New Year’s Eve
Jan. 1, Monday – New Year’s Day 2024

BIRTHDAYS

Caleb McLaughlin (actor, Lucas on “Stranger Things”) … 22
Sacha Baron Cohen (actor, “The Spy,” “The Dictator,” “Bruno,” “Borat”) … 52
Kate Walsh (actress, “Grey’s Anatomy) … 56
Marie Osmond (singer, TV host) … 64
Sammy Hagar (singer) … 76
Paul Simon (singer/songwriter, Simon and Garfunkel) … 82

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“If you’re going to be able to look back on something and laugh about it, you might as well laugh about it now.”

(A) Hillary Clinton
(B) Bill Clinton
(C) Marie Osmond

ANSWER: (C) Marie Osmond

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2010 – The last of 33 miners trapped underground in Chile for 69 days was brought to the surface. Rescuers, still underground, held up a sign for the TV cameras reading “Mission accomplished Chile,” which was seen by a TV and internet audience estimated at more than 1 billion viewers around the world watching the rescue live.
* What a missed moneymaking opportunity! Should have said “Mission accomplished Chile, now we’re going to have a Coca-Cola!”

1992 – A new record for circling the globe by airplane was set when an Air France supersonic jetliner completed a circumnavigation in 33 hours.
* Then the pilot woke up, apologized to the passengers, and finally landed the thing.

1988 – The Catholic Church announced that the Shroud of Turin was a fake, after Carbon-14 dating showed it was woven in the Middle Ages.
* It was not a great moment to ask them about that “papal infallibility” stuff.

1884 – Greenwich Mean Time became the standard by which other time zones in the world are calculated.
* So when you’re late for work, blame Greenwich.

1860 – The first aerial photograph was taken from a balloon in Boston.
* “Oh, let me just step back a little … a little more … Aaaaaaaaa …”

1792 – George Washington laid the cornerstone of the White House.
* The first thing to be laid at the White House – and certainly not the last.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2016 – Bob Dylan was awarded the 2016 Nobel Prize for Literature, becoming the first songwriter to win the prestigious award. The 75-year-old rock legend received the prize “for having created new poetic expressions within the great American song tradition.”

2012 – An oil painting by the German artist Gerhard Richter, which was owned by Eric Clapton, sold for $34m – an auction record for a work by a living artist. Clapton planned to give the money to the Crossroads Center drug and alcohol rehabilitation center he founded in Antigua.

2004 – The US Internal Revenue Service charged 63-year-old Ronald Isley, lead singer of the Isley Brothers, with tax evasion for failing to report income from royalties and performances by the band between 1997 and 2002. He was later found guilty and sentenced to three years in prison.

2002 – UK rock band Muse took legal action against Celine Dion after she announced her upcoming Las Vegas show would be called Muse. Singer Matt Bellamy from the band said “We don’t want anyone to think we’re Celine Dion’s backing band.”

1998 – The substance abuse clinic The Crossroads Center of Antigua opened. The center was underwritten by Eric Clapton with the promise that no one will be turned away that needs treatment for drug and alcohol addiction.

1992 – The U.S. Supreme Court decided not to reinstate lawsuits against Ozzy Osbourne alleging that his music prompted the suicide of two teenagers.

1984 – Stevie Wonder started a three-week run at No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with “I Just Called To Say I Love You,” his 7th U.S. No.1.

1979 – Michael Jackson went to No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with “Don’t Stop Till You Get Enough,” his second U.S. solo No.1.

1975 – Neil Young underwent an operation at a Los Angeles hospital to remove an object from his vocal cords.

1973 – The Rolling Stones started a four-week run at No.1 on the U.S. album chart with “Goat’s Head Soup” the group’s fourth U.S. No.1.

1965 – The Who recorded “My Generation” at Pye studios, London.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. In a recent survey, 10% of people said they have experienced THIS on a date. What is it?
A car accident

2. According to research, doing THIS at dinner on a first date increases your chances of a second date. What is it?
Ordering the exact same thing

3. When asked what is the one non-negotiable feature someone has to have in order for you to date them, 13% of people surveyed said THIS. What is it?
They must be wealthy

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