STUDY: YOU’RE LESS LIKELY TO DIE WITH A FEMALE SURGEON

Two new studies, published Wednesday in the Journal of the American Medical Association, found that the gender of a surgeon does impact results. The studies in total looked at 2.2 million surgeries performed on residents of Ontario, Canada. They found that patients treated by male surgeons were around 25% more likely to experience severe complications over the next year, and 50% more likely to die over that time period, than those treated by a female surgeon. Researchers said the results should cause male surgeons to reconsider their surgery methods and learn from their female counterparts.
* Like, for example, don’t have the football game on in the O.R. during surgery.
* Male surgeons are also prone to saying, “Meh, there’s always a couple a parts left over after these things.”
* This explains all the bad Yelp reviews.
* The most important thing male surgeons don’t do that female surgeons do: Ask For Directions!
* So female surgeons are … a cut above. Any way you slice it.