THURSDAY, Mar 2 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR THURSDAY, March 2, 2023
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: PROMOS-TO-GO

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

DR. SEUSS DAY
Theodor “Dr. Seuss” Geisel was born on this day in 1904. His pen name Seuss was his middle name and his mother’s maiden name.

NATIONAL BANANA CREAM PIE DAY

OLD STUFF DAY
The Holiday Insights website says this:
“When asking someone ‘What’s new?’ or ‘What’s happening?’, how often do you hear ‘Nothing really, same old stuff.’ Well, today is Old Stuff Day, in recognition of this all too common response. It is suggestive of a boring time period, or a boring life style … how sad. Old Stuff Day is not a day to do the same old stuff. Rather, it’s a time to recognize the boring nature of your daily routine, and make some exciting changes. Find new and different activities, projects, and hobbies. Attend an event. Do something, anything, different. You will be glad that you did!”

READ ACROSS AMERICA DAY
A project of the National Education Association.

TEXAS INDEPENDENCE DAY
Texas Independence Day is the celebration of the adoption of the Texas Declaration of Independence on March 2, 1836. With this document signed by 59 people, settlers in Mexican Texas officially declared independence from Mexico and created the Republic of Texas.

March is:

Adopt a Rescued Guinea Pig Month
American Red Cross Month
Employee Spirit Month
Expanding Girls’ Horizons in Science and Engineering Month
Gender Equality Month
Irish-American Heritage Month
National Craft Month
National Women Inventors Month
National Women’s History Month
Read an E-Book Month

ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES

WHAT TO WATCH – New and Returning Shows and Movies
Premiering Thursday through Sunday
Listings sourced from the TV Guide and EW websites

THURSDAY, Mar 2

“West Side Story,” “Drive My Car”
HBO Max – The theatrical releases come to streaming. The TV Guide website says “West Side Story” will also be on Disney+.

Season Premiere:
Netflix – “Sex/Life”

FRIDAY, Mar 3

“Daisy Jones and the Six”
Amazon Prime Video – New Series
Synopsis: Follows the story of a 1970s band fronted by two feuding yet charismatic lead singers, Daisy Jones and Billy Dunne. Set to the soundtrack of original music, this is the story of how this iconic band imploded at the height of its powers.

“Our Flag Means Death”
HBO Max – New Series
Synopsis: Follows the misadventures of 18th century gentleman-turned-pirate Stede Bonnet and his crew aboard the Revenge as they try to make a name for themselves as pirates and cross paths with famed pirate captain Blackbeard.

“The Tourist”
HBO Max – New Series
Synopsis: When a man wakes up in the Australian outback with no memory, he must use the few clues he has to discover his identity before his past catches up with him.

“The Dropout”
Hulu – New Series
Synopsis: In a tale of ambition and fame gone terribly wrong, Elizabeth Holmes develops healthcare technology that puts millions of patients at risk and loses everything in the blink of an eye.

“The Exhibit: Finding the Next Great Artist”
MTV – New Reality Competition Series
Synopsis: Seven rising artists compete for $100,000 and the chance to stage a career-defining exhibit at the Smithsonian’s Hirshhorn Museum and Sculpture Garden.

Season Premiere:
Netflix – “Next in Fashion”

SATURDAY, Mar 4

“Secret Sauce with Todd Graves”
A&E – New Series
Synopsis: Todd Graves, the CEO of Raising Cane’s and self-described fry cook and cashier, meets people from all walks of life to learn about their paths to success.

“The Boys Presents: Diabolical”
Amazon Prime Video – New Animated Series
Synopsis: Tells standalone stories set in the universe of “The Boys.”

“Fresh”
Hulu – New Movie
Synopsis: A twisted movie about the horrors of dating.

Season Premiere:
TLC – “Say Yes to the Dress”

SUNDAY, Mar 5

“SWV and XSCAPE: The Queens of R&B”
Bravo – New Reality Series
Synopsis: As the two groups come together in preparation for a special concert event, the ladies reveal the inner workings of putting on a live concert.

“Married by Mistake”
E! – New Movie
Synopsis: After losing her dream job, Riley gets drunk with Nate and the next morning they find themselves married. Accepting Nate’s proposal they travel to Tennessee to rescue his family’s business, but will they be able to keep up the deception?

Season Premiere:
Food Network – “Be My Guest with Ina Garten”

SECRETS OF “SURVIVOR”

“Survivor” has been on for an unbelievable 23 years now – since 2000. They’ve done 43 seasons. Recently, eight “Survivor” competitors spoke with Insider magazine about their time on the show and shared behind-the-scenes secrets:
– Competitors commonly get laser hair removal before competing, namely women and their armpits.
– Competitors have access to a medical box in the woods with supplies like sunscreen, bug spray, and vitamins.
– Competitors aren’t allowed to go to the bathroom in the ocean at night because they might die. Sharks.
– The production team has a set of ‘identical’ replacement clothes for each contestant.
– Contestants can also request a new pair of underwear, but it’s not easy.
– Contestants aren’t allowed to directly address the camera crew.
– Competitors have to reenact some moments to get a better camera shot.
– Tribal council lasts ‘a lot longer’ than it does on-screen.
– Contestants see a doctor right after they’re voted off.
– Contestants said CBS provides therapy after the show.
* Those are all pretty much the same thing they provide to contestants on “The Price is Right.” Particularly therapy and underwear.
* So, now you know – if you’re ever on “Survivor,” you can try sabotaging the sunscreen, bug spray, and vitamins.
* The biggest secret: Jeff Probst quit the show years ago. They just splice in old scenes of him from earlier seasons.
* Well, that was interesting. But what we really want are behind-the-scenes secrets from “Naked and Afraid.”

THE BUZZ

THREE DUMB HEADLINES

Time for another episode of Three Dumb Headlines. These are actual, word-for-word headlines of stories found on the internet. There’s no story, no context, just the actual headline. Discuss them amongst yourselves. Then, encourage listeners to vote for the Dumbest Headline on your station’s social media page. Maybe ask them to leave a comment. Reveal the results in the next break.
Today’s Dumb Headlines:
1. “Why Are People Eating Oranges In The Shower”
2. “Where’s Hoda?!”
3. “He Took His Shoes Off 20 Years Ago. He Hasn’t Put Them Back On.”
And here’s a spare, in case you don’t like one of those three: “I Accidentally Started A ‘Violent’ Debate About The Best Spoons”

FOREIGN WORDS THAT SHOULD BE ADDED TO ENGLISH

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary people started a Twitter thread on Tuesday asking non-English speakers for words in their language that are perfect, but don’t have an English equivalent. Some of the responses:
– Arabic: ‘soubhiyé.’ That quiet time when you’re the only one awake in the house and can enjoy a cup of coffee before the day starts.
– ‘Sobremesa’ in Spanish, which describes that time around the table with those you love – normally after you’ve finished eating, and you’re just chatting and connecting.
– The Finnish word ‘sisu.’ Loosely translated, you might hate doing a thing, but the thing has to be done, so you will do the thing. (* Cleaning the cat box is sisu. Thanksgiving with your in-laws is sisu.)
– The Japanese word ‘tsundoku,’ meaning acquiring books and letting them pile up without reading them. (* In America, we call that ‘college.’)
– Arabic: ‘na’iman” – a blessing or congratulations given to someone post-haircut or post-bath. (* I guess in Saudi Arabia, a haircut or a bath are rare enough that you need to say something.)
– ‘Pesado.’ Spanish word. It literally means heavy, but it’s meant to describe a person who is not likable because it feels like they are weighing you down. (* [to your co-host] What? Why are you all looking at me?)
– ‘Freschìn,’ a Venetian word: That particular smell typical of fish markets when the last remaining crates of fish are taken away. (* Ah – like at Whole Foods.)
– ‘Ftruc’ – Croatian word meaning doing something out of sheer spite or anger for being told you CANNOT do it. (* As in, “Ftruc you, I did it anyway”?)
– The Tagalog (Philippines) word ‘gigil.’ It describes the overwhelming feeling you get when you see something so cute that you want to eat it. (* I thought Tagalogs were a Girl Scout cookie?)
– Another tagalog word, ‘kilig’ – the inexplicable joy one feels after experiencing something romantic. (* Don’t we call that ‘swooning?’)
– ‘Verschlimmbessern’ (German) – To make something worse by trying to make it better. (* Like our income tax system.)
– The German word ‘kabelsalat.'[ Basically translates to “cable salad,” which is when all your cables tangle up on their own
– The German word ‘Vorfreude,’ means a joyful and intense anticipation from imagining future pleasures.
* So is the Merriam-Webster Dictionary going to add any of these words, or are they just jerking around the entire rest of the world?
* I’m feeling vorfreude right now, because it’s time to check in one the (news/weather/traffic).

U.S. NEWS

SURGEON RUNS A HALF-MILE TO RETRIEVE ORGAN NEEDED FOR TRANSPLANT

Dr. Adam Bodzin, a surgeon at Jefferson Hospital in Philadelphia, was scrubbed and read to perform a liver transplant last fall when he learned that the vehicle transporting the organ was stuck in traffic. Roads surrounding the hospital were nearly impassable due to thousands of runners participating in the Philadelphia Marathon. Dressed in his white lab coat and scrubs, Dr. Bodzin ran for half a mile, dodging marathon runners, to retrieve the liver for his 66-year-old patient. He was able to flag down a police officer to drive him back to the hospital. The transplant was successful, and the patient is doing fine. The heroic surgeon hopes his story will inspire more people to become organ donors.
* Or take up jogging.
* One nice part – the marathon people gave him a Certificate of Attendance.
* He would have made it back to the hospital even sooner if he hadn’t stopped for a soft pretzel.
* How are we not delivering organs by drones by now?

GRANDMA BURIED IN M&M COFFIN

A grandmother in Arizona was buried in an M&M-shaped casket. Mary Stocks Martin, a retired teacher from Snowflake, Arizona (* A real place!), died on Feb. 9, at the age of 86. At her funeral on Feb. 18, guests were able to see Martin’s unique casket. Martin designed her M&M-shaped casket, with help from her son, years before her death. Martin had worked as a schoolteacher for 30 years, and would initial everything ‘MSM,’ but that ‘S,’ in cursive of course, looks like M&M. Students started bringing her M&Ms memorabilia and it just turned into something that she reflected on as part of her success as a teacher.” The casket was modeled after the blue almond M&M.
* So she was a little nutty inside, too.
* She loved M&Ms so much that, when she became ill, there were no Lifesavers around to resuscitate her.
* Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, plain to peanut.
* I bet when people saw the casket, there were a lot of snickers.

THE 214-YEAR-OLD CLAM

Some people digging for clams on St. James Island in Florida dug up a 2.6-pound quahog (‘COH-hog’) clam that researchers estimated to be 214 years old. Blaine Parker said he was collecting shellfish to make chowder when he found the gigantic quahog, an Atlantic species found most often north of North Carolina. The average quahog typically weighs up to half a pound and measures around 4 inches in length. This clam was measured at 6 inches long. Parker said they were just going to eat it, but thought about it a while and figured it was probably pretty special. So, they took the clam to the Gulf Specimen Marine Lab in nearby Panacea, where researchers said the alternating bands of light on the clam’s shell indicate it was born in 1809, the same year Abraham Lincoln was born. Parker dubbed his find Aber-Clam Lincoln. (* They could be twins, with the beard!) Lab officials said Lincoln is believed to be the fourth-oldest clam on record. The oldest, a quahog named Ming, was discovered off the coast of Iceland in 2007 and was determined to be 507 years old.
* So, in human years, almost as old as Joe Biden.
* Well, that’s just clam-tastic.
* Wow! 507 years! Think of all the things that clam … didn’t see and has no idea happened.
* It’s good they didn’t eat it. I hear they get tough after 150 years.
* You’re a clam. You live in the sand along the northern seaboard. It’s cold, you start feeling a little… clammy… and you decide to take a trip down to Florida. You hear good things about the heat down there. So you head to Florida, and 200 years later, just as you’re settling in, someone digs you up to eat you.

AUDIO: WORLD’S UGLIEST DOG COMPETITION NOW TAKING APPLICATIONS

The World’s Ugliest Dog Contest, held annually in California, is now taking applications. The contest, held each June at the Sonoma-Marin Fair, is seeking dogs with “too little hair, too many wrinkles, an unusual nose or a funny waddle” to compete in this year’s competition. Tawny Tesconi, the CEO of the fair, says the World’s Ugliest Dog contest is “a celebration of the imperfections that make our dogs lovable, a good many of them are rescues from shelters and puppy mills, so we use the fun and notoriety of this competition to raise awareness for dog adoption. Dogs are like family and deserve loving homes no matter their physical distraction.” The annual event offers a top prize of $1,500 for the World’s Ugliest Dog, with a $200 for second place and $150 for third place.
* So if you have an ugly dog, or maybe your kid’s just a little funny looking, contact the Sonoma-Marin Fair.
* Every dog owner will receive a souvenir paper bag with eyeholes.
* None of these prizes are anywhere near big enough for doggie plastic surgery. (see audio)
* Some of these contestants are real bowzers.
* The first dog to come away from the contest pregnant wins Miss Congeniality.
CLIP: Our classic “Pet Plastic Surgery” parody spot.
CLIP URL: morningsidekick(dot)(com)/prep/wp-content/uploads/PetPlasticSurgery(dot)mp3

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

MAN WALKS AROUND WITH HIS MUMMY IN A BAG

Police in Peru confiscated a mummified human, between 600 and 800 years old, from a former food delivery man who was carrying it in an isothermal bag used to deliver food to people’s homes. The man, 26-year-old Julio Bermejo, who was inebriated, said that the mummy, whom he called “Juanita,” has been in his family for three decades, since his father first brought it home. She was “like my spiritual girlfriend,” he said. He denied he was trying to sell the mummy and said he was carrying it around because “my friends wanted to see it.” The mummy, which was wrapped in bandages in the fetal position, was given over to the Ministry of Culture who determined that it was not female, but a “mummified adult male, at least 45 years old, presumably from the eastern area of Puno,” a region in the Peruvian Andes. Mr. Bermejo was being held for investigation.
* A male? That’s so much less romantic.
* “Hey, how come this mummy smells like pizza?”
* Well, he’s boned. And so is his mummy – ha!
* Juanita always did like to travel.
* I’ve heard of blow-up girlfriends, but never one that came Some Assembly Required.
* That’s all the info I have, so let’s wrap up the mummy story.

TRENDING

PRISCILLA PRESLEY TO DANCE ON ELVIS’ GRAVE, WILL VOICE HER OWN CHARACTER ON ANIMATED SHOW

Priscilla Presley has signed on to voice herself in Netflix’s upcoming adult animated action comedy series “Agent Elvis.” Agent Elvis follows Presley as he trades in his jumpsuit for a jet pack when he is covertly inducted into a secret government spy program to battle the dark forces that threaten the country he loves — all while holding down his day job as the King of Rock ’n’ Roll. Priscilla joins Matthew McConaughey who is set to voice the role of Elvis Presley, along with Kaitlin Olson, Johnny Knoxville, Niecy Nash, Tom Kenny and Don Cheadle. The animated series created by Priscilla Presley and John Eddie, and debuts on March 17.

JENNIFER NETTLES JOINS “THE EXORCIST”

Sugarland singer Jennifer Nettles has joined the cast of “The Exorcist” in a key role. This version of “The Exorcist” is the first installment in the new horror trilogy. Nettles shared her news on Instagram: “I have been absolutely, beside myself, giddy to share this with you and I finally can. I am proud beyond words to get to be a part of this amazing project. I can’t wait to tell you more…….but I’ll have to!” The exact details of her role haven’t been revealed. Nettles will join the cast, which includes Leslie Odom Jr., Ann Dowd, Lidya Jewett and Ellen Burstyn, who returns in her role as Chris MacNeil from the original version released in 1973.

“LILITH” WILL RETURN TO THE FRASIER REBOOT

The upcoming “Frasier” revival at Paramount+ is bringing back one familiar face: Bebe Neuwirth as Dr. Lilith Sternin in a guest star role. Neuwirth will reunite with her onscreen husband Kelsey Grammer as Dr. Frasier Crane. The two originated the characters on the hit sitcom “Cheers,” with Neuwirth first appearing on the series in 1986. The revival series will take place in Boston, which was the setting for “Cheers.” According to the official description of the episode in which Neuwirth will appear, Lilith and Frasier reunite at their grown son Freddy’s birthday party.

OUR FAVORITE MONTHS

A recent YouGov poll asked 1,000 adult US citizens what their favorite and least favorite months of the year were.
Most Favorite Months: December, October, June, May, July, April, September.
Least Favorite Months: February, January, March, November.

ADAM SANDLER TO RECEIVE NICKELODEON COMEDY AWARD

Adam Sandler will be honored with the first King of Comedy award at this year’s Nickelodeon Kids’ Choice Awards, which is about right. The show airs air on March 4.

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

March 12, Sunday – Daylight Saving Time Begins
March 17, Friday – St. Patrick’s Day
March 20, Sunday – Spring begins, Spring Equinox is 5:24 p.m. EDT
March 21, Monday – First full day of Spring
April 1, Saturday – April Fools Day
April 9, Sunday – Easter
April 18, Tuesday – U.S. Tax Day
May 14, Sunday – Mother’s Day
May 29, Monday – Memorial Day

BIRTHDAYS

Bryce Dallas Howard (actress, “Black Mirror,” “Jurassic World” movies, Ron Howard’s daughter) … 42
Rebel Wilson (actress, “Pitch Perfect” movies) … 43
Chris Martin (singer with Coldplay) … 46
Daniel Craig (actor, “Knives Out” movies, most recent James Bond) … 55
Jon Bon Jovi (singer) … 61
Laraine Newman (comic actress, on first cast of Saturday Night Live) … 71

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“I’ve always loved to dress up a bit and show off.”

(A) Elton John
(B) Pope Francis
(C) Daniel Craig

ANSWER: (C) Daniel Craig

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2021 – On the anniversary of Dr. Seuss’s birthday, Dr. Seuss Enterprises announced that six books by the author would be removed from publication because of racist and insensitive imagery.
* “Things” weren’t happy about the way he drew “Thing 1” and “Thing 2.”

2020 – Russian President Vladimir Putin proposed a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage.
* “Forward into the past!”

2016 – The oldest known land fossil (Tortotubus – 440 million years old) from Gotland, Sweden, was revealed by British scientists.
* And yes, it was found holding tickets to a Rolling Stones concert.

2004 – NASA announced that the Mars rover Opportunity had discovered evidence that water had existed on Mars in the past.
* Where did it go? Did they drink it all?

1969 – The supersonic jet Concorde made its first flight. The only thing that needed replacing afterwards was a towel rail.
* A passenger jet with towels! Those were the days!

1923 – “Time” magazine first appeared on newsstands.
* It sold pretty well, considering that was before they had late-night TV commercials hawking special offers for cheap desktop radios.

1903 – Groundbreaking ceremonies were held for the Hershey chocolate factory in Hershey, Pennsylvania.
* Sweeeet!

1825 – The first grand opera in the U.S. sung in English was heard in New York City.
* What a great idea, too! I mean – look how it caught on!

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2016 – Bob Dylan sold his personal archive of notes, draft lyrics, poems, artwork and photographs to the University of Tulsa, where they would be made available to scholars and curated for public exhibitions. The 6,000 item collection also included master recording tapes of Dylan’s entire music catalog, along with hundreds of hours of film and video.

2013 – A pencil doodle by Paul McCartney when he was a teenager sold for over $5,000. The sketches were drawn by McCartney during the late 1950s while a student at the Liverpool Institute High School For Boys. The drawings showed multiple faces with different expressions on a single sheet of paper in pencil.

2003 – 50 Cent started a nine-week run at No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with “In Da Club.”

2003 – R. Kelly was at No.1 on the U.S. album chart with “Chocolate Factory.”

1997 – LeAnn Rimes went to No.1 on the U.S. album chart with “Unchained Melody, The Early Years.”

1991 – Madonna’s “Rescue Me” entered the U.S. hot 100 at No.15, making her the highest-debuting female artist in rock history.

1991 – Mariah Carey started an 11-week run at No.1 on the U.S. album chart with her debut “Mariah Carey.”

1985 – Wham! started a three-week run at No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with “Make It Big,” which eventually went on the sell over 5 million copies in the U.S.

1984 – The wife of Mick Jagger, Jerry Hall, gave birth to Elizabeth Scarlett Jagger.

1983 – The compact disc was launched.

1975 – An L.A. policeman who stopped a Lincoln Continental for running a red light was surprised to find Paul McCartney at the wheel with his wife Linda. The cop detected a smell of marijuana and on searching the car found eight ounces. Linda McCartney was arrested for the offense.

1960 – After completing his Army service and flying back to America, Elvis Presley stepped on British soil for the first and only time in his life when the plane carrying him stopped for refueling at Prestwick Airport, Scotland.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. 29% of men said they’re more likely to open up and have a deep conversation while doing THIS. What is it?
Driving

2. 57% of men have had the same one of THESE since childhood. What is it?
Best friend

3. 63% of men said they keep THIS in their car at all times. What is it?
Cologne

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