NATIONAL PARKS WITH THE MOST RESCUED TOURISTS

National Parks are great, but boy, they can kill you. The National Park Service keeps track of the number of rescues of lost hikers, campers, people falling off cliffs, people attacked by animals… you name it. Here are the parks that had the most search and rescues between 2018 and 2020:
– Grand Canyon: 785
– Yosemite: 732
– Sequoia and Kings Canyon national parks (combined): 503
– Yellowstone: 371
– Rocky Mountain National Park: 341
– Zion: 285
– Glen Canyon: 271
– Grand Teton: 224
– Olympic: 204
– Arches: 202
* I bet, for everybody they rescue at the Grand Canyon, the rangers look at you on the stretcher and they say, “Not so Grand now, is it? Ha ha ha!”
* That 371 number for Yellowstone … is that the park or the TV show? Because they’ve killed about 371 people on that show.
* How are these rescues not a Discovery Channel reality show?
* How many have to be rescued from the overwhelming stench of the national park outhouses?
* National parks just aren’t designed for people, much less Americans.