MAN RUNS OVER NEIGHBOR FOR PEEING ON LAWN

Police in London, Ontario, are investigating after a 38-year-old man hit one of his neighbors with his car. It happened last Friday. The neighbor had been peeing on his front lawn. Police allege that the man got into his vehicle and purposely struck the victim, causing said victim “to be thrown a number of meters and sustain a gash to the back of his head.”
* Urine trouble now, eh?
* There’s a drought on. You’d think the guy would be happy his lawn’s being watered.
* He was just marking his territory. Basic Canadian stuff.