BRIDEZILLA WANTS TO SORT GUESTS BY WEIGHT

(This can’t possibly be real, but it’s on the internet so it must be true.)
Last week, a screenshot of a note written by an anonymous bride was uploaded on Reddit. The bridezilla wrote that she’s planning a destination wedding in Hawaii in 2019, and wants her guests to partake in “synchronized dancing” along the beach. “The dress code is very specific because it will be used to create an incredible visual effect,” the post reads. Everybody is supposed to wear a different color based on their weight. Let’s repeat that: the guests will be color-coded according to their weight. According to the post:
– Women between 100 and 160 pounds are required to wear orange suede pants, Louboutin heels and Burberry Scarves.
– Women who are over 160 pounds are required to sport all-black sweaters, pants and heels.
– Men 100-200 pounds are to wear a purple fuzzy jacket, soda hat and all-white sneakers.
– Men 200+ pound are to wear all camouflage and black sneakers.
– Kids are required to wear “red from head to toe” as they will be forming the shape of a heart in the dance routine.
And then:
“Additionally, we will require that you wear formal attire after the dancing has ended. Please bring a change of clothing. Remember, this venue is extremely upscale, and we want to be looking our absolute BEST ladies and gents. If you look like trash, so will we. You have a year and a half to get working. No excuses! Mwah.”
* You have a year and a half to weasel out of going, she means.
* This can’t be true. No way would a woman like this would ever invite a woman over 160 pounds to her wedding.
* Shouldn’t the heavier people get to wear vertical stripes?
* Good luck to the guys finding those purple fuzzy jackets.
* One message to the groom: Dude, she’d better be a good lay.