YOGI WHO DIDN’T EAT OR DRINK DIES (AT 90)

An Indian yogi who claimed he spent decades without food or water died Tuesday at the age of 90, due to old age. Mr. Prahlad Jani spent his life in a routine of yoga and mediation, and had picked up a following in the country. Jani claimed that he was blessed by a goddess when he was a child which enabled him to survive without sustenance. He claimed he got the “elixir of life from the hole in my palate, which enables me to go without food and water.” There was no way of verifying Jani’s claims (* Well, I can think of five ways right now.) But in 2010 a team of military doctors studied him for two weeks at a hospital in Ahmedabad, India. Jani was watched with cameras and closed circuit television. Doctors took scans of his organs, brain and blood vessels, and conducted tests on his heart, lungs and memory capacity. They said he did not eat, drink or go to the toilet, and his only contact with fluid was during gargling and bathing periodically. A neurologist on the team told reporters, “We still do not know how he survives.” Although the results of that study were never published or submitted for peer review.
* He was a yogi, which means he was part bear, and Yogi Bears hibernate where they don’t eat or drink for months. How’s THAT for an explanation?
* One plus – by not eating or drinking, he didn’t have to fight for toilet paper during the pandemic.
* No food at all? Including his fingernails?
* He got everything he needed from India’s polluted air. There’s so much crap in India’s air, it’s chewy.
* Will there be a buffet at the reception after the funeral?