WEED WHACKER ATTACKER

In St. Petersburg, Florida, two neighbors – who had never met before – exchanged a few heated words that turned into an all-out physical attack. Last Friday, while driving his truck, Dan Lorek decided to stop to confront his neighbor, Jeffrey Koshen, who was doing yard work. He claims that a few weeks before, Koshen sped down their flooded street, splashing him, his paperwork, phone and wallet. As Lorek sat in his truck telling Koshen what he thought of him, Koshen came at him with a weed whacker, scratching up the side of the truck. Lorek got out of his truck, and Koshen attacked him up and down with the weed whacker. Lorek wrestled Koshen to the ground while another neighbor grabbed the lawn tool. Koshen, who lists his employer as Lawn Love, was arrested. Lorek came away with 74 cuts on his legs, three on his back and three bumps on his head.
* Attacked with a weed whacker? That’s wacky! Was the guy on weed?
* This wasn’t tit-for-tat, this was slash-for-splash.
* Coulda been worse. Coulda been a hedge-trimmer.
* Or, God forbid, a wood chipper.
* The company is “Lawn Love” but the employee is “People Hate”.
* Don’t worry, Mr. Lorek, all your body hair will grow back.
* So did they resolve their differences or not?
* I hate these incomplete stories.
* I’m glad he survived. Nobody wants to get whacked by a weed whacker.
* If they think the street was flooded before wait ’til Hurricane Matthew gets here.
* Of course, they’re over on the Gulf side but I bet Hurricane Matthew has enough for everybody.