WEDNESDAY, Sept 6 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR WEDNESDAY, September 6, 2023
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: A & M AUTOLAND – Stock Numbers; THE ONLY MORNING SHOW IN TOWN

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

FIGHT PROCRASTINATION DAY
The Days Of The Year website says this:
“’I never put off till tomorrow what I can possibly do – the day after.’ – Oscar Wilde. Procrastination can really be the bane of our existence, with another day coming around the corner, there’s no real reason that we can’t put it off till tomorrow is there? Of course not, and tomorrow has another tomorrow, so let’s do it again! It is by this way of thinking that absolutely nothing gets done, and we know good and well that procrastination is us out to get ourselves. But what can we do? Fight Procrastination Day reminds us that it’s up to us to beat this monster, and only we can decide to get up and get done today what was supposed to be done.”

NATIONAL COFFEE ICE CREAM DAY

READ A BOOK DAY

September is:

Baby Safety Month
Better Breakfast Month
Chicken Month
Classical Music Month
Hispanic Heritage Month
Honey Month
Little League Month
National Piano Month
Self Improvement Month

THE BUZZHOT AIRPLANE CABINS

Now that summer is over and nobody is flying anymore, someone has noticed that the airplanes get really, really hot when they are sitting on the tarmac. Federal regulators have set no uniform standards for cabin temperatures during boarding. Just how hot will airlines will let the cabins get? According to Politico, American Airlines will let cabin temperatures hit 90 degrees before it is considered too hot to board. JetBlue Airways used to have 80 as their upper limit, but they recently snuck it up to 85 degrees. Delta, United and Southwest — they don’t set any maximum cabin temperatures that would cause them to keep passengers from boarding, spokespeople for the companies said.
* Those spokespeople always take the train, I bet.
* Meanwhile, in the luggage compartment, your suitcase is melting.
* On the bright side, they only have to microwave the meals half as long.
* Evaporative coolers are the way to go. They could probably fit one on ever plane, if they took out one of those emergency chutes that never get used.
* I guess growing a sequoia forest next to every airport so the planes can park in the tree shade isn’t feasible.

ADVERTISING THAT WORKS

Fark.com asked: “What’s a piece of advertising that absolutely worked on you, for better or worse?” Some of the responses:
– “When I was a teenager, our household received a sample of Lever 2000 soap in the mail. Over 30 years later, I still buy that soap.”
– “Sometime in the late ’70’s we received a small sample bottle of Dawn dish soap in the mail. It must have been good because after that my mother never bought any other brand of dish soap.”
– “The Safelite auto glass jingle.”
– “The Big Texan Steak Ranch in Amarillo has signs up for 300 miles on I-40 advertising their 72-oz steak dinner, drinks in boot mugs, rattlesnake fritters, etc. It’s utterly, completely cheesy and we stop there every time we make a cross country trip.”
– “I once went to a wedding and every guest room had a care package from the hosts of various Louisiana foodstuffs. It was my first time eating Zapp’s Cajun Crawtators chips. I buy those all the time now.”
– “I got a Mach III razor for my 18th birthday from Gillette. I’m 40. Been using them ever since with the original handle.”
– “The G.I. Joe WIth Kung Fu Grip commercial worked on me.”
* PHONE TOPIC: What is a piece of advertising that worked on you? Bonus points if you mention a commercial on this radio station!

U.S. NEWS

FLORIDA DEPUTY LEADS OTHER COPS ON CAR CHASE

A deputy in Florida has lost his job after leading fellow deputies on a high-speed chase. Jakob Kite, 22, was caught just past midnight on Sunday traveling at 105 mph in a 60 mph zone near Lakeland in central Florida. When deputies, with sirens wailing and emergency lights flashing, tried to pull over Kite’s Subaru Impreza, he sped off, at one point hitting 130 miles per hour. (*Man, Kite was flyin’!) He ran through a stop sign, then careened off a concrete median, narrowly avoiding a collision with a patrol car. Eventually, deputies managed to stop Kite’s car and arrest him. Officers suspected he was intoxicated and administered a breathalyzer test, but his result was .035%, which is below Florida’s legal limit of .08%. Kite, who joined the department in 2020 and was named deputy sheriff in April, resigned after his arrest.
* Kind of the opposite of “quiet quitting.”
* You’d think a 22-year-old would have the necessary maturity to be a gun-totin’, authority-asserting lawman.
* It’s always fun running around with your buddies from work on the weekend.
* He wasn’t drunk, but was Kite high?
* I’m not saying doing 105 miles an hour is right, but I do know that the faster you can get out of central Florida the better.

CHICAGO DOES NOT HAVE A NUDE BEACH, DESPITE SIGN

There’s a new sign on Chicago’s Loyola Beach on the banks of Lake Michigan. The sign says, “Nude Beach Past This Sign.” Problem is, there are no nude beaches in Chicago. Somebody put up the official-looking sign, perhaps as a prank, or maybe just a pervert with binoculars who lives nearby. Chicago alderwoman Maria Hadden took to Facebook Monday posting the message: “We’ve been notified that someone has installed this cheeky sign at Loyola Beach. Please note that this is not an official Chicago Park District sign. We’ve reported to Parks so they can remove it. As a reminder, at least some clothing is required at all of our beaches.”
* Aw, come on, lady, cut loose a little for once in your life.
* Some clothing is required? A baseball cap is clothing.
* Real or not, this is a great prank. Remember it for next April Fool’s Day.
* If Chicago had a nude beach, they’d have to change the nickname from “City of Big Shoulders” to “City of Immense Thighs.”

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

11,000 MARATHON RUNNERS DISQUALIFIED FOR CHEATING

Organizers of last week’s Mexico Marathon have disqualified 11,000 runners after electronic trackers revealed the participants had not completed the full course. Over 30,000 runners participated in the event in Mexico City on August 27, but an investigation using data from the runners’ electronic trackers revealed that thousands had not passed through checkpoints along the route. Runners were accused of using vehicles and public transport during the race to shorten the 26-mile course.
* 26 MILES??? What did they THINK was going to happen?
* It was a banner day for Mexico City’s bus system.
* Why enter a marathon if you’re just going to cheat? Were 11,000 people really just trying to impress a girl?
* If you didn’t actually run the race, can you get a refund on your entrance fee?
* I hope these people learned their lesson. And the lesson is, NEXT year get a real runner to carry your tracker.

TRENDING

JOE JONAS AND SOPHIE TURNER DIVORCING

Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner are splitting up. The singer filed a petition for divorce from the actress in Florida on Tuesday in Miami Dade County. The petition states the marriage is “irretrievably broken” as grounds for dissolution. A source told TMZ the reason for the split is, “She likes to party; he likes to stay at home. They have very different lifestyles.” The two are parents to two daughters who were born in 2020 and 2022. Jonas is seeking shared custody. He and Turner have a prenuptial agreement, according to the filing.

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

Sept. 11, Monday – Patriot Day
Sept. 15, Friday – National POW/MIA Recognition Day (The third Friday of September)
Sept. 23, Saturday – Fall begins (Autumn Equinox is 2:50 a.m. EDT)
Oct. 9, Monday – Columbus Day
Oct. 16, Monday – National Boss’s Day
Oct. 31, Tuesday – Halloween

BIRTHDAYS

Idris Elba (actor, “Hijack,” “Beast,” Luther,” “Heimdall” in Marvel Thor movies) … 51
Rosie Perez (actress, “The Flight Attendant”) … 59
Mark Chesnutt (country singer) … 60
Jeff Foxworthy (comedian, actor, TV host) … 65
Jane Curtin (comic actress, “3rd Rock from the Sun”, “Kate & Allie”, “Saturday Night Live”) … 76
Swoosie Kurtz (actress, “Man with a Plan”) … 79
Roger Waters (singer/songwriter, formerly with Pink Floyd) … 80
David Allen Coe (country singer/songwriter) … 84

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“You watch yourself age and it’s hard to feel like a sex symbol.”

(A) Harrison Ford
(B) Clint Eastwood
(C) Idris Elba

ANSWER: (C) Idris Elba

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2001 – Ebay Inc. was found not liable for copyright infringement after bootleg copies of a Charles Manson documentary were sold on the site.
* For you kids, “bootleg copies” was how you got stuff before the invention of torrents.

1997 – More than 2 million people watched the funeral service of Princess Diana that was held at Westminister Abbey.
* Another fabulous money-making “Pay Per View” opportunity missed.

1992 – A 35-year old man died ten weeks after receiving a transplanted baboon liver.
* So, basically, the baboon got even.

1989 – Bon Jovi performed an acoustic version of “Wanted Dead Or Alive” at the MTV Awards, inspiring the idea for the famous “Unplugged” concerts.
* A much better name than what Bon Jovi said – “Ooops, I forgot my electric.”

1975 – Martina Navratilova requested political asylum while in New York for the U.S. Open Tennis Tournament.
* She wanted to live in a land of freedom and democracy … where you could make a ton of money.

1959 – The first Barbie Doll was sold by Mattel Toy Corporation.
* Can you IMAGINE what that doll would be worth today?

1913 – The first “loop the loop” was executed by an airplane.
* Later, the pilot explained to the stunned crowd, “It was an accident! There was a bee in my cockpit and I freaked out!”

1899 – Carnation processed its first can of evaporated milk.
* But – if it was evaporated, what was left in the can?

1620 – The Pilgrims left on the Mayflower from Plymouth, England to settle in the New World.
* Guaranteeing that America would be the most sexually repressed and neurotic of all the Western nations.

1522 – Explorer Ferdinand Magellan’s remaining crew reached the Spanish coast and completed the first ever journey around the world.
* And their luggage was never seen again.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2016 – Barbra Streisand extended her US chart record after she scored her 11th US No.1 album with her “Encore: Movie Partners Sing Broadway.” The star had already notched up more chart toppers than any other female artist, and extended her lead over Madonna, who has eight. She also overtook Elvis Presley, who has 10, to tie with Bruce Springsteen.

2011 – A California judge ruled that Madonna did not hold a trademark over the phrase “Material Girl” for her line of clothing just because she wrote a song by that name in 1985. An L.A. retailer called LA Triumph had been using the name “Material Girl” clothing and had registered it as a trademark.

2006 – Victor Willis, who performed as the policeman in The Village People, was given three years probation for drugs offenses. Willis co-wrote some of the group’s biggest hits – including “YMCA” and “In The Navy.”

2001 – Earth Wind and Fire announced that Viagra would sponsor their forthcoming 30th anniversary American tour.

1997 – Elton John recorded a new version of “Candle In The Wind” after performing the song live at Diana Princess of Wales’ funeral. The track went on to become the biggest selling UK single of all-time.

1990 – Tom Fogerty, guitarist with Creedence Clearwater Revival, died at age 49, due to complications from AIDS acquired during a blood transfusion.

1988 – 2,000 items of Elton John’s personal memorabilia including his boa feathers, “Pinball Wizard” boots and hundreds of pairs of spectacles were auctioned at Sotheby’s in London.

1970 – Jimi Hendrix made his final live appearance when he appeared at the Isle Of Fehmarn in Germany. The guitarist died on September 18th of that year after choking on his own vomit.

1969 – After a show in the Memphis Mid-Southern Coliseum, James Brown announced his retirement from live performance after July 4, 1970.

1968 – Eric Clapton recorded his guitar solo on The Beatles’ “While My Guitar Gently Weeps.”

1961 – Bob Dylan debuted at the Gaslight Cafe in New York City.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. Four in ten married men do THIS on their wedding nights. What is it?
Carry their wives over the threshold

2. 11% of married men surveyed say they can’t do THIS because of their job. What is it?
Wear their wedding ring

3. 54% of married men surveyed said they have not done THIS for their wives in the past year. What is it?
Bought her flowers

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