WEDNESDAY, Oct 25 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR WEDNESDAY, October 25, 2023
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: A & M AUTOLAND – Halloween; THE ONLY MORNING SHOW IN TOWN

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

INTERNATIONAL ARTIST DAY
The International Artist Day website says this:
“For over a decade International Artist Day has honored the contribution artists have and are making to society. On IAD, October 25, take an artist to lunch, or buy that painting that’s been haunting you for the last month. Visit a gallery, or go to the symphony. Participate in something creative outside your daily routine. Live Life!”

NATIONAL GREASY FOODS DAY

WORLD PASTA DAY
The Days Of The Year website says this:
“World Pasta Day was brought into existence as part of the World Pasta Congress on the 25th of October in 1995. Experts from all over the world came together to discuss the glories of the noodle, with particular emphasis on the importance of spreading knowledge of the world’s panorama of pasta. This organization uses World Pasta Day to promote the eating of pasta, along with its cultural and culinary importance.”

October is:

Adopt a Shelter Dog Month
American Cheese Month
Car Care Month
Child Health Month
Consumer Information Month
Cookbook Month
Country Music Month
Fire Prevention Month
National Pizza Month
National Popcorn Month
National Service Dog Month
Vegetarian Awareness Month

ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES

KURT COBAIN’S DAUGHTER MARRIES TONY HAWK’S SON

Frances Bean Cobain, the 31-year-old daughter of the late Kurt Cobain and Courtney Love, has married skateboard wizard Tony Hawk’s son Riley Hawk. The wedding reportedly happened earlier this month, on October 7 in Los Angeles. The ceremony was officiated by R.E.M.’s Michael Stipe, who is Frances’ godfather.
* The bride wore grunge.
* The most moving part of the reception was the couple’s first slamdance.
* And then everybody partied at the X Games.
* Is this not the most alternative wedding you could imagine? The couple was registered at Hot Topic and Zumiez.
* Let the nutty baby names commence!

THE BUZZ

SMALL UPGRADES THAT MAKE A BIG DIFFERENCE

Reddit asked: “What small upgrade made a huge difference at your house?” Some of the responses:
– “A better shower. If you can’t redo the whole bathroom, just replace the head. This also works if you rent — just keep the old one in a box so you can bring the nice one to your next house.”
– “A curved shower curtain rod. You get so much more arm space.”
– “My wife and I got separate blankets. No more fighting about who takes the covers while we’re sleeping.”
– “Soft-close cabinets and toilet seats.”
– “The toilet paper roll holders that are U shaped and don’t have the spring thing.”
– “Blackout curtains for sleeping. A game changer.”
– “Smart outlets for Christmas lights, both inside and outside. I have them scheduled to turn on at sunset and turn off at midnight.”
– “Installing a gooseneck kitchen faucet.”
– “Having a couple of those magnetic wall-mounted knife holders frees so much room on my countertops.”
– “A Roomba. And raised every piece of furniture off the ground with little metal legs, just enough for the robot vacuum to get the dust under there ”
– “Those little battery-powered lights that light up only when someone passes by.”
– “Three cat boxes for 3 cats. Two wasn’t enough.”
– “Bidet. Bidet. Bidet. Best thing I’ve ever purchased.”
* PHONE TOPIC: What is the best small change you made to you home?

AUDIO: THE RATTIEST CITIES IN THE U.S.

Each year, Orkin pest control lists the “Top 50 Rattiest Cities” list based on the number of new rodent treatments performed between September 2022 and August 2023 on both residential and commercial properties. This year’s winners:
1. Los Angeles
2. Chicago
3. New York
4. Washington, DC
5. San Francisco
6. Philadelphia
7. Baltimore
8. Denver
9. Detroit
10. Cleveland
* Los Angeles wins the rat race!
* Well, I suppose NOT coming in Number 1 in rats would be a good selling point for these other cities’ tourism boards.
* This is actually pretty lousy advertising for Orkin, isn’t it?
* Time to dump more baby alligators into the sewers.
(* Note: Morning Sidekick, as you know, lives in the Denver metro area. Rats never make the local news. Grasshoppers and moths, though…)
* CLIP: “Rats, Billy!” from SCTV.
* CLIP URL: morningsidekick(dot)(com)/prep/wp-content/uploads/Rats-SCTV(dot)mp3

U.S. NEWS

MAN REPORTS LOST CHILD; HE HAD LEFT IT AT HOME

A Connecticut father who reported his child missing after a supermarket visit was arrested Monday after cops found he was, in fact, intoxicated and had left the child at home. Colby Parker, 30, called police at around 8:15 p.m. to report his child missing from his car parked outside a supermarket in Tolland. This sparked a mass-search involving Connecticut State Police Troopers, supermarket staff, local police and K-9 teams. Local residents were alerted. Staff from the supermarket reviewed CCTV footage. They discovered Parker had made two trips to the store that evening. On the first visit, Mr. Parker was accompanied by a child, but the second time around it was just Parker. Troopers went to Parker’s home and found the kid there, safe and well. Officers asked Parker to participate in sobriety test. He failed. The child was handed over to a family member.
* This is why you Instacart.
* The police also took away Mr. Parker’s “World’s Greatest Dad” coffee mug.
* “Sorry, officers – I was so overjoyed to find the kid at home, I chugged a six-pack.”
* Still, not as bad as driving off with the kid on top of the car in a carseat.
* To top it off, he forgot to get milk. Twice.

THE PILOT WHO TRIED TO CRASH THE JET: MORE DETAILS

There are more details from the incident of the off-duty pilot who tried to crash that plane. Off-duty pilot Joseph Emerson was in the jump seat in the cockpit when he allegedly said, “I’m not OK,” and reached up to grab the red fire handles that stop fuel from going to the engines, in case of an engine fire. But Emerson was “unable” to pull the red T-handles down all the way and fully activate the engine shutoff because the pilots were wrestling with him. From the time Emerson said “I’m not OK” to when he exited the cockpit was about 90 seconds. Flight attendants put Emerson in wrist restraints and sat him in the back of the plane. Emerson allegedly told one flight attendant that “he just got kicked out of the flight deck” and “you need to cuff me right now or it’s going to be bad.” As the plane descended, Emerson allegedly “tried to grab the handle of an emergency exit” but was stopped by a flight attendant
When taken into custody, Emerson allegedly told officers he believed he was having a “nervous breakdown.” Emerson said he had not slept in 40 hours prior to the incident and allegedly mentioned using of psychedelic mushrooms. He told officers, “I pulled both emergency shut off handles because I thought I was dreaming and I just wanna wake up.” Emerson also stated he became depressed about six months ago. The FBI is trying to figure out whether this was a psychedelic trip, a mental health crisis or something else.
* It’s something else all right.
* Sounds like he was higher than the plane.
* And. by the way, we need to thank the news media for letting every person in the world know that, if you want to shut off an airplane engine midflight, just look for the bright red fire suppression handles and give them a good, hard pull. And do it fast, before the pilots wrestle with you.
* All these handles in planes need bicycle locks.
* I miss the days when pilots were just plain drunk.

ROBBER GIVES PHARMACIST A HANDWRITTEN LIST

A 23-year-old Florida man was arrested for armed robbery after he handed pharmacy employees a note demanding a laundry list of prescription drugs. Orlando Police say Thomas Mues gave a handwritten note to pharmacists at a CVS store. The note read, “This is an armed robbery!!! Please follow these directions or I will shoot the closest person to me! Bag the following: Oxycodone, Hydrocodone, Xanax, Adderall, Liquid Codeine, Viagra.” Officers arrived at the scene as Mues was walking out of the store and took him into custody.
* Also known in the pharmacy business as the “Weekend in Tijuana Special.”
* Viagra! He’d already had his stick up.
* I’m shocked!! Who writes cursive anymore?
* Wow. After the day he had, he could’ve really used those drugs.
* Say what you want, this guy at least put some planning and effort into it. You don’t often see that in a drug robbery.

A-HOLE PAYS HIS $23,500 BUSINESS DEBT IN COINS

A northern Colorado company called JMF Enterprises hired welding company Fired Up Fabrication to do welding work on an apartment building. Fired Up Fabrication later filed a civil lawsuit against JMF saying it was not paid in full. After mediation, JMF was ordered to pay the welding company $23,500. Which they just did – all in coins. The $23,500 debt in quarters, dimes, nickels and pennies weighed more than 6,000 pounds and arrived on a flatbed truck. The lawyer for the welding company refused to accept delivery. JMF’s attorney wrote, “the coins, being current coin of the realm, constituted a tender of the settlement funds, and therefore, JMF has complied with the terms of the agreement. The settlement agreement did not outline any specific form for the payment.” JMF is now asking a judge to force the plaintiffs to accept the coins. The judge is likely to reject it, plus add a fine.
* Now THAT is what’s called petty cash. REALLY petty.
* Fired Up Fabrication isn’t very happy. But then, lots of people fight against change.
* Where do you even get that many coins these days? Sofa cushions?
* Hey, who wants to do business with JMF Enterprises now? Anybody? Anybody? Hands? Anybody?
* Those guys are jerks. But that’s just my two cents.

TRENDINGMORE REVELATIONS FROM BRITNEY SPEARS’ BOOK

Britney Spear’s new book, “Oops, I’m Topless Again” officially came out Tuesday. Even though most of the juicy details have already been leaked, here are even more. (* And this is the last time we’re going to write anything about Britney for awhile)
– Starting in the eighth grade, she would take trips with her mother, Lynne Spears, to Biloxi, Miss., to drink daiquiris.
– Her “good girl” image was pushed by her managers and the press because she had so many teenage fans. However, she’d been “having sex since [she was] 14.”
– Shortly after breaking up with Justin Timberlake, Britney got involved in a two-week affair with actor Colin Farrell. “Brawl is the only word for it — we were all over each other, grappling so passionately it was like we were in a street fight,”
– Britney calls out Justin and her longtime pop rival, Christina Aguilera, for their famous 2003 Rolling Stone cover. She writes, “Even if they weren’t trying to be cruel, it felt like they were just pouring salt in the wound. Why was it so easy for everyone to forget that I was a human being — vulnerable enough that these headlines could leave a bruise?”
– Britney’s team forced her to be interviewed by ABC’s Diane Sawyer, who she slams for reducing her to tears with “harsh question after harsh question” about Justin after their split. “I shouldn’t have been forced to speak on national TV, forced to cry in front of this stranger, a woman who was relentlessly going after me.”
– She also slams Ryan Seacrest for questioning her mothering ability in a 2007 interview.
– Britney also recalls experiencing perinatal depression after having her first son. “They seemed so vulnerable out in the world of jockeying paparazzi and tabloids,” she writes. “I began to suspect that I was a bit overprotective when I wouldn’t let my mom hold Jayden for the first two months.”
– She lost out on the lead role in “The Notebook” to Rachel McAdams.
– She was offered a part in the 2002 film adaptation of “Chicago” as “a villain who kills a man, and sings and dances while doing it, too.”
– When she was in a mental health facility for months under her conservatorship, she asked younger sister Jamie Lynn to help get her out. “Stop fighting it. There’s nothing you can do about it, so stop fighting it,” she responded.
– When Britney returned from the facility, Jamie Lynn pitched her on joint projects, including a sister talk show, a sitcom and a rom-com.

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

Oct. 31, Tuesday – Halloween
Nov. 5, Sunday – Daylight Saving Time Ends, turn clocks back 1 hour
Nov. 11, Saturday – Veterans Day
Nov. 23, Thursday – Thanksgiving
Dec. 21, Thursday – Winter begins, winter solstice occurs at 10:27 P.M. EST
Dec. 25, Monday – Christmas
Dec. 31, Sunday – New Year’s Eve
Jan. 1, Monday – New Year’s Day 2024

BIRTHDAYS

Katy Perry (singer) … 39
Chely Wright (Country singer) … 53
Samantha Bee (comedian, TV host) … 54
Nancy Cartwright (voice of Bart on “The Simpsons”) … 66
Jon Anderson (singer, “Yes”) … 79
Marion Ross (actress, “Happy Days”) … 95

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“Besides my big boobs, it is probably my hourglass shape that is my best feature. I play off of that a lot. I like that I have a lot on top and a lot on the bottom.”

(A) Calista Flockhart
(B) Danny DeVito
(C) Katy Perry

ANSWER: (C) Katy Perry

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2001 – Microsoft released the Windows XP operating system.
* But since it worked way too good, they had to replace it with Vista.

1955 – Microwave ovens went on sale for the first time.
* They sold like hot cakes. Well, like hot cakes with a cold patch in the middle where they haven’t heated through properly.

1954 – The Air Force announced to the world that UFOs did not exist.
* Well, that takes care of that.

1924 – The comic strip Little Orphan Annie debuted.
* And she’ll always be known as having the scariest looking eyes on the
comics page.

1881 – Wyatt Earp and Doc Holliday challenged the Clanton gang and the McLowery’s to the legendary “Gunfight at the OK Corral.”
* But they had ballet class that night so it was put off for a few days.

1873 – The first postcard was mailed in the United States.
* Ought to be arriving any day now.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2012 – Forbes magazine reported that Michael Jackson topped their list of highest-earning dead musical celebrities by earning $145 million in 2011. Elvis Presley ranked No.2 with $55 million in earnings, and Bob Marley No.3 with $17 million.

2003 – Johnny Cash’s step-daughter, Rosey Nix Adams and her fiddle player Jimmy Campbell were found dead on their tour bus in Clarksville, Tennessee from carbon monoxide poisoning. Heaters that had been left on were blamed for the accident.

2001 – 13 law firms were involved in claims to Grateful Dead’s guitarist Jerry Garcia’s $10 million estate six years after his death. Former wives and girlfriends continued to fight on how to distribute his estate and annual royalties of $4.6 million.

1997 – After falling over on stage when reaching for a guitar pick, Johnny Cash announced during a gig in Michigan that he was suffering from Parkinson’s disease.

1986 – Bon Jovi went to No.1 on the U.S. album chart with “Slippery When Wet,” featuring two U.S. No.1 singles, “You Give Love A Bad Name” and “Livin’ On A Prayer.” The album went on to sell over 8 million copies worldwide.

1986 – Cyndi Lauper started a two-week run at No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with “True Colors.”

1986 – Dire Straits Mark Knopfler broke his collarbone after crashing in a celebrity car race before the Australian Grand Prix.

1974 – While Al Green was taking a shower at his Memphis home, his ex-girlfriend Mary Woodson burst in and poured boiling hot grits over the singer, then shot herself dead. Green suffered second-degree burns.

1970 – Speaking at a U.S. radio conference President Nixon asked programmers to ban all songs containing drug references.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. 37% of homeowners have one of THESE in their home, and might not even know it. What is it?
An unopened moving box from a past move

2. About 21% of people surveyed said they have THIS in their home or office because they think it makes them look smarter. What is it?
Books on display

3. Over 90% of homes have one of THESE. What is it?
A junk drawer

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