WEDNESDAY, Oct 11 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR WEDNESDAY, October 11, 2023
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: A & M AUTOLAND – Conscience; THE ONLY MORNING SHOW IN TOWN

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

INTERNATIONAL DAY OF THE GIRL CHILD

NATIONAL COMING OUT DAY

NATIONAL SAUSAGE PIZZA DAY

SOUTHERN FOOD HERITAGE DAY

October is:

Adopt a Shelter Dog Month
American Cheese Month
Car Care Month
Child Health Month
Consumer Information Month
Cookbook Month
Country Music Month
Fire Prevention Month
National Pizza Month
National Popcorn Month
National Service Dog Month
Vegetarian Awareness Month

ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES

JERRY HINTS AT “SEINFELD” REUNION

Jerry Seinfeld was performing at Boston’s Wang Theatre last Saturday night, and at the end of the show he was answering questions from the audience. One person asked whether or not he liked the “Seinfeld” show’s finale — where the four characters were sent to jail for being jerks. Jerry said this: “Well, I have a little secret for you about the ending. But I can’t really tell it because it is a secret. Here’s what I’ll tell you, OK, but you can’t tell anybody. Something is going to happen that has to do with that ending. Hasn’t happened yet. And just what you are thinking about, Larry and I have also been thinking about it. So you’ll see, we’ll see.”
* What we’ve been thinking? That the show ran out of ideas and everyone has plenty of money?
* They’d HAVE to change the ending. If we put jerks in jail today, there wouldn’t be enough cells.
* If current network TV is any indication, Seinfeld will come back as a lousy game show.
* Of course, these days it will have to feature celebrities – like all the “Seinfeld” guest stars who became famous: Bryan Cranston, Teri Hatcher, Marcia Cross, Courteney Cox, Megan Mullally, Debra Messing…
* Maybe they’ll all show up on this new “Frasier” reboot. Maybe Fox can add “Seinfeld: 911” to their franchise? They never answer an emergency call because of some nitpicky thing.

THE BUZZ

WHERE TEENS SPEND THEIR MONEY

According to Piper Sandler’s Taking Stock With Teens survey released Tuesday, here is where teens spend their money. Piper Sandler surveyed 9,193 U.S. teens with an average age of 15.7. The average teen spends $2,316 a year; 37% hold a part-time job (* so for 63% of them, it’s YOUR money).
– More than half of teens say Amazon is their favorite e-commerce site, far surpassing competitors Shein and Temu.
– Nike remains the No. 1 brand for all teens in apparel and footwear. American Eagle and Lululemon are #2 and #3.
– E.l.f., an affordable makeup and skincare brand, is the top cosmetics brand for teens.
– Chick-fil-A is the favorite restaurant among teens, followed by Starbucks and McDonald’s.
– Goldfish is teens’ favorite snack brand.
– Monster, Red Bull and Celsius are teens’ favorite energy drinks.
* How did “pot” not make this list anywhere?
* Back in my day we didn’t have brands. We just had clothes.
* Then there’s the stuff that didn’t make the survey, like tattoos and vapes.
* Also, “I hate you, you don’t understand me” is teens’ top go-to statement to parents, followed by, “I didn’t say anything” and “This is stupid.”

ODD SLANG IN U.S. STATES

Every U.S. state has it’s own slang. Here are some of the weirdest slang words from these United States:
– A “tavern” in South Dakota is a sloppy joe sandwich.
– Florida: “jiffy feet” for dirty feet.
– New York: “grill” to stare rudely at people.
– Maine: “right out straight” means telling the truth.
– In Mississippi, “carry” means to drive someone.
– Kentucky: “dirty bird” means KFC.
– Hawaii: “grinds” means going out for a restaurant dinner.
– Montana: “borrow pit” is the ditch along the side of the road.
– Missouri: “put out” means you are angry.
* PHONE TOPIC: Do you have a weird slang word from a state you used to live in?

U.S. NEWS

CEMETERY WORKER FALLS INTO GRAVE

A cemetery worker in South Brunswick, New Jersey, became trapped in a grave on Tuesday afternoon. The incident happened at the Holy Cross Cemetery. A funeral service had just wrapped up when the 47-year-old worker fell through a wooden board about six feet down into an open grave. He separated his shoulder, leaving him injured and unable to move. Two dozen – TWO DOZEN – first responders helped in the rescue, shoring up the hole so they could get the worker out. Or, as the official report said, “Rescue technicians deployed trench panels and ground pads to stabilize the area in and around the pit. We then had to use a rope system to get the man out of the grave and turn him over to EMS. He was taken to the hospital for treatment.”
* They couldn’t have just dropped down a step ladder?
* I guess the cemetery is designed to put people into the ground, not take them out.
* When he got out, he realized he was alive and still in New Jersey, so he jumped back in.

FLORIDA SAUSAGE FIGHT

A Florida woman was arrested after she threw a sausage and Coke can at a Kwik King gas station cashier in Ocala. The incident started when customer De’Asia Cobb complained about the way the cashier was doing her job. The two reportedly shouted racial slurs at one another, and that’s when Cobb allegedly grabbed a sausage and tongs from the broiler tray and hurled them both at the cashier. Ms. Cobb then left the store, but the cashier grabbed the sausage off the floor, went outside and threw it at Cobb’s car. Cobb retaliated by throwing the Coke can she just purchased and the same sausage back at the cashier. The cashier was able to get out of the way to avoid being hit by it (* At Kwik King, you gotta move pretty kwik!). Cobb was arrested and charged with battery and disorderly conduct.
* The sausage was, presumably, returned to the broiler display.
* Was is a horrible fight? Oh, it was the wurst.
* Give ’em each a paddle and you could have had Sausage Pickleball.
* Just as well – it sounds like De’Asia didn’t really need the caffiene in that Coke.
* I guess there’s no point in asking how your race affects how you run a cash register.
* It may have been a sausage fight, but in this battle, there were no wieners.

WOMAN FINDS STRANGE MAN IN HER HOUSE WATCHING TV

Nashville, Tennessee, homeowner Colleen O’Connell woke up Sunday morning about 6:30, fixed breakfast, grabbed and read the newspaper from the front porch – which she curiously noticed had already been taken out of the wrapper – and then went to take her dog Buddy for a walk. That’s when she noticed the door to her office was closed. She opened it to find a strange man sitting there watching TV. O’Connell said she screamed and ran to her neighbor’s house, where they watched the man leave her house. Police located the suspect, who was discovered to have also stolen cash and debit cards.
* Some people really have to get their Sunday morning “Meet the Press” fix.
* This story is unbelievable. Someone still reads a newspaper?
* Nashville still HAS a newspaper?
* At least he didn’t fill in the crossword puzzle.
* And we have to mention the excellent home security work here by Buddy the dog. Good boy!

TEACHER SHOWS 4TH GRADERS WINNIE-THE-POOH SLASHER FILM

A fourth-grade teacher at a Miami Springs, Florida, charter school showed his class the slasher horror movie “Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey,” a film featuring Winnie the Pooh as a homicidal maniac. ( *And this is different from the Disney version how?) The movie, which came out earlier this year and received a 3% score from critics on Rotten Tomatoes, shows a deranged Pooh and Piglet on a killing spree. According to reports, the students selected the film, although after a half hour they were asking the teacher to turn it off. Officials at the school, The Academy of Innovative Education, say they addressed the issue directly with the teacher, and that the students exposed to the film were connected with a mental health counselor.
* Coolest teacher ever?
* (in a deep Eeyore voice) “Well, Rabbit, I guessss we’re gonnnnnna diiiiiiiee todaaaayyy.”
* The surprise ending is when Tigger jumps in and eats Poohs face.
* Another bad teacher story. Oh, bother. (* see audio clip)
AUDIO CLIP: Winnie says “Oh, bother.”
CLIP URL: morningsidekick(dot)(com)/prep/wp-content/uploads/Winnie-the-Pooh(dot)mp3
* PHONE TOPIC: Did you ever have a teacher that did something totally inappropriate for the age of the class?

DONUTS DELIVERED BY JASON FROM “FRIDAY THE 13TH”

This Friday is Friday the 13th. Hurts Donuts of Tulsa, Oklahoma, is doing something special. They will have a guy dress up as Jason Voorhees, the killer in the hockey mask from the “Friday the 13th” movies, to deliver donuts to you or someone you know. Jason will be delivering donuts on Friday the 13th only. However, they also offer a scary clown that will be doing deliveries on different dates as well. If you live in Tulsa, call Hurts Donuts to place your order.
* If Jason doesn’t kill you, the cholesterol from all those donuts will.
* To make it really scary, after you get the donuts, Jason measures your glucose level.
* The donuts cost about $15, plus the life insurance policy for the guy running around town in a mass murderer costume.
* Why is it Hurts Donuts? Does he throw the box at you?

TRENDINGBOB COSTAS SAVES CHOKING MAN

Sports commentator Bob Costas? Saved a guy’s life. Costas was eating at a restaurant when he noticed a diner choking at a table nearby. Bob jumped into action and, according to others, saved his life. Specific details about how the incident happened have not been made public, and Costas wants it that way. According to his rep, “Bob doesn’t think this was that big of a deal. He really feels he did what just about anyone else would do in a similar situation.”

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

Oct. 14, Saturday – Annular Solar Eclipse (ANNULAR*, not ANNUAL)
(* The moon will not completely cover the sun – being farther from Earth it will be slightly smaller, resulting in a “ring of fire” effect)
Oct. 16, Monday – National Boss’s Day
Oct. 31, Tuesday – Halloween
Nov. 5, Sunday – Daylight Saving Time Ends, turn clocks back 1 hour
Nov. 11, Saturday – Veterans Day
Nov. 23, Thursday – Thanksgiving
Dec. 21, Thursday – Winter begins, winter solstice occurs at 10:27 P.M. EST
Dec. 25, Monday – Christmas
Dec. 31, Sunday – New Year’s Eve
Jan. 1, Monday – New Year’s Day 2024

BIRTHDAYS

Cardi B (rapper) … 31
Michelle Trachtenberg (actress, “Gossip Girl,” “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”) … 38
Emily Deschanel (actress, “Bones”) … 47
Jane Krakowski (actress, “Schmigadoon!,” “Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt,” “30 Rock”) … 55
Joan Cusack (actress, “Shameless”) … 61
Daryl Hall (singer, Hall and Oates) … 77

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“I love to roller skate.”

(A) Kermit The Frog
(B) Joe Biden
(C) Jane Krakowski

ANSWER: (C) Jane Krakowski

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

1995 – The earliest known mushrooms, dating back over 90 million years, were discovered in New Jersey.
* In a Wendy’s salad bar.

1987 – In England, a huge sonar exploration of Loch Ness failed to find the elusive monster.
* Next time, don’t invite Geraldo Rivera to cover it.

1983 – The last hand-cranked telephones in the U.S. went out of service. The 440 telephone customers of Bryant Pond, ME, were switched to direct-dial service.
* And so were immediately able to receive telemarketing phone calls. Hooray!

1975 – Bill Clinton married Hillary.
* Why?

1939 – Albert Einstein warned President Franklin Roosevelt of the possibilities of the atomic bomb.
* Still, apart from solving some of the lifelong mysteries of time, energy, space and the Universe, what did he know?

1936 – The first radio quiz show, “Professor Quiz,” was broadcast.
* It was a long way from “The $64,000 Question” and “Who Wants to Be a Millionaire” – the winner got two dollars and a fish dinner.

1929 – The first in-flight meal was served aboard an airliner, on a flight from London to New York.
* How bad was the food? All the people who took that flight ARE DEAD!

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2016 – Rod Stewart was knighted by the Duke of Cambridge at Buckingham Palace in recognition of his services to music and charity.

2010 – George Michael was released from Highpoint Prison in Suffolk, England after serving four weeks of an eight week sentence for driving under the influence of drugs.

2009 – 54-year-old Jo Wood, wife of The Rolling Stones’ Ronnie Wood, was granted a divorce after 24 years of marriage on the grounds of adultery. The couple split in 2008 after the guitarist, 64, began a relationship with a 20-year-old woman.

2006 – Madonna adopted a one-year-old boy in Malawi, Africa. The boy’s father, Yohane Banda, told reporters “I know he will be very happy in America.” The boy’s mother had died a week after he was born.

1999 – Motley Crue drummer Tommy Lee was released on $5,000 bail after facing charges relating to a riot at a gig in North Carolina in 1997. Lee allegedly incited the crowd to attack a guard and had also poured a drink over his head.

1997 – Elton John went to No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with his world-wide charity hit “Candle In The Wind 97,” his eighth U.S. No.1 single.

1988 – Ringo Starr and his wife Barbara started treatment for alcohol abuse at a clinic in Tucson, Arizona.

1986 – Janet Jackson started a two-week run at No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with “When I Think Of You,” her first U.S. No.1.

1960 – Aretha Franklin made her stage debut at the Village Vanguard, New York.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. 14% of people with tattoos have THIS tattooed on their body. What is it?
Their pet

2. 3% of pet owners have bought THIS gift for their dog. What is it?
A pet stroller

3. About 5% of pet owners let their pets do THIS only on holidays. What is it?
Eat human food

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