WEDNESDAY, May 14 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP EMAIL AND TEXT VERSION FOR WEDNESDAY, May 14, 2025
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: A & M AUTOLAND – Buy Tires, Get Car Free

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing – including “holidays” created by the National Day Calendar and Wellcat websites to drive traffic to their websites – or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year. We present only those specially designated days we feel your listeners would find most interesting or significant.)

NATIONAL BUTTERMILK BISCUIT DAY
The National Day Calendar website says this:
“Biscuits are made using baking powder or baking soda as a leavening agent rather than yeast. Before the American Civil War, biscuits emerged as an inexpensive addition to meals. This sturdier bread product soon became popular as people realized it absorbed the gravy on their plate better than plain bread. Soon a new family favorite, biscuits and gravy, was created. Biscuits have been a staple of the Southern United States cuisine for many years and are often made with buttermilk. Traditionally served as a side dish with butter, they are also served at breakfast with molasses, light sugarcane syrup, maple syrup, sorghum syrup, honey, jam or jelly or as a breakfast sandwich.”

NATIONAL RECEPTIONISTS DAY (Second Wednesday in May)

May is:

Chip Your Pet Month / Pet Month
Date Your Mate Month
International Civility Awareness Month
National Barbeque Month
National Bike Month
National Egg Month
National Hamburger Month
National Military Appreciation Month
National Salad Month
National Salsa Month
Older Americans Month

ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES

THE ECONOMICS OF LIVE CONCERTS

A company called GigaCalculator has done an analysis of the economics behind 2025’s biggest tours. Their numbers show exactly what you’re getting for your concert ticket money. For example:
– Lana Del Rey tops the list as music’s priciest performer on a per-song basis. If you paid $240 for a Lana Del Rey ticket, you’ll be seeing an 83-minute show with just 15 tracks, which breaks down to $16.02 for each song you hear. When calculated by time, that’s $2.90 per minute of performance
– Lady Gaga’s Mayhem Ball Tour comes out to $13.97 per song and $2.47 per minute. Though her tickets average $321, her 130-minute performances spans 23 songs and delivers more music for the money.
– Beyoncé’s Cowboy Carter tour prices out at $13.63 per track, with 36-songs over two-and-a-half-hours, and a ticket price averaging $491 per seat. Her per-minute rate figures out at $3.30 per minute.
– Charli XCX’s Arena Tour features abbreviated 73-minute sets with just 20 songs. Fans pay $12.97 per song and a $3.55 per minute.
– Bad Bunny charges the steepest ticket price ($354), but his 33-song, 135-minute show at the Coliseo de Puerto Rico brings the per-song cost down to $10.31 and the per-minute rate to $2.62.
– Ed Sheeran is the value champion: $4.79 per song, $0.91 per minute.
* And Ed Sheeran is such a nice guy, he’ll give you your 4 bucks back if you don’t like the song.
* This really helps if you take a gal to a concert, you’ll know exactly how much she owes you for the songs she missed while she was in the bathroom. “15 minutes, three-and-a-half songs… you owe me $42.07.”
* The next step in this is, you’ll just pay for the songs you want to see, and they’ll put you in an isolation helmet that only opens up when they do that song.

THE BUZZ

SLEEPING NAKED STORIES

Reddit asked, “People who sleep naked, when has it ever backfired?” Some of the responses:
– “I was once sleeping on my stomach, and my dog barfed on my back.”
– “Apartment building caught on fire. I had just enough time to grab my husband’s robe (which was missing the tie) and run outside with a infant and toddler. News crew showed up. My kids are trying to crawl into my robe because they’re scared. Definitely flashed more people that day than I would have liked.”
– “I was sleeping at college and a burglar came in … he didn’t think anyone was home because it was spring break but I had stayed. He opened my door, saw me, apologized, then took a bag of cookies I had and my roommate’s Nikes., Couldn’t run after him because, well, I was naked.”
– “In college. The only thing I could grab was a coat. So there I am Donald Ducking with the rest of my dorm waiting for the fire department to let us in building. All because some idiot burned a grilled cheese sandwich.”
– “Got our house broken into, held at gunpoint. Yup, definitely worse with your junk out.”
– “While on tour with a show, at a hotel I got up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, half asleep. It wasn’t until I heard the click of the door behind me that I realized I had just stepped out into the hallway. Thankfully, it was the dead of night, and the only person I had to face was the front desk clerk, who didn’t laugh too hard.”
– “I had just laid down for bed and starting hearing a buzzing sound. Hopped out of bed and hit the lights and a Yellowjacket was attacking me. Not a fun battle to fight with no armor.”
* PHONE TOPIC: Have you got a good “sleep naked” story?

U.S. NEWS

MASSAGE PARLOR RAID FINDS $600,000 INSIDE GIANT TEDDY BEAR

Authorities in Edison, New Jersey, conducted a raid last Thursday at the Bliss Spa massage parlor, suspected of prostitution and money laundering. Police recovered more than $750,000 — including $600,000 in cash sewn inside a giant teddy bear found at the business owner’s home. Daniela Diienno, 47, is charged with money laundering, promoting organized street crime, and promoting and maintaining a house of prostitution.
* Aww. How can any story with a teddy bear not have a happy ending?
* Do they have to wait for the money to make it’s way through the teddy bear’s digestive system and come out its butt? Are they waiting for Winnie to Pooh?
* It’s a new massage parlor business model: The Boink-a-Bear Workshop.

MAN WROTE HIS OWN OBITUARY

This is an actual obituary of Mr. Gary Wolfelt of Lafayette, Indiana. He wrote it himself, and it was published on Legacy.com, an obituary website, on May 8, 2025. (It’s been edited here, but only a little):
“Hello. I am Gary. I am completely dead now. I am surprised that it took this long to happen. I had several close calls throughout my lifetime. I guess that I was just lucky that something didn’t get me long before now. I had a long series of events and mishaps that looking back should have killed me long ago.
– While I was the second baseman on the most losing team in Little League Baseball history (0 for 20), I lost sight of a fly ball in the sun and got beaned right on the forehead. I guess that explains a lot later in life now that I think about it.
– In my twenties my sister’s horse kicked me real hard right in the gut. Any higher and my heart probably would have stopped. Any lower and I probably would have been singing soprano for the rest of my life.
– In my thirties, I got hit by a car when I was crossing the street. It was my fault as I was crossing against the light. But I got up and brushed it off and went home with a torn up coat and kind of sore. Lucky me!
– In my forties, I was in the process of tearing down an old dilapidated building when the building came crashing down and a large brick chimney just missed falling on me by about 10 feet.
– In my fifties, I got knocked down nineteen stairs at my office by a concrete-lined safe which landed on top of me and pinned me to the floor. That one was the worst! I didn’t get any body parts broken and no internal injuries. But I couldn’t even pick up my own feet to get into bed for about a week.
– And then in my sixties, I fell backwards off of a scaffold from ten feet up and cracked my head on the concrete floor. But that one turned out to be a fortunate fall. Because it forced me to go visit my doctor and while I was there he determined that I had prostate cancer (early enough to be treated). But then in my early seventies that treatment failed and I had to have my prostate surgically removed. I developed an internal leak that nearly killed me. One more close call late in life!
– I cannot tell you here what sort of event actually killed me as I wrote this obituary before I was completely dead. Someone else will have to fill in the details later on I guess.”
* Boy, the marketing people for that upcoming “Final Destination” movie are spot on!
* This guy’s had more close calls than the finish line camera at the Kentucky Derby.
* How did he die? This is true: Gary Wolfelt died flying a homebuilt ultralight experimental aircraft in a rainstorm. He was 72. So I guess catching that baseball in the head in little league was what eventually killed him.

NEW JERSEY POLITICAL CANDIDATE HAS A FOOT FETISH WEBSITE

A Democratic candidate for the New Jersey State Assembly has a side hustle selling photos of her feet on an adult content website that caters to people with foot fetishes. Rebecca Holloway, running to represent the 6th legislative district, has been legally selling photos of her feet on Feetfinder.com for the last two years. The website is not considered traditional pornography and instead caters to the fetish market. She charges $5 for a monthly subscription for photos of her feet. She takes special requests for particular poses of her feet. There is nothing unlawful about Holloway’s online activities.
* How disgusting! Getting into politics, I mean.
* She sounds well-heeled.
* Well, as the old saying goes, vote with your feet.
* She obviously likes to toe the party line.
* She says she’ll speak truthfully and never put her foot in her mouth, unless you want to pay an extra $10.

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

WORLD RAMEN FESTIVAL WAS A DISASTER

The very first World Ramen Festival took place in Busan, Korea, a couple of weekends ago. Promoters promised more than 2,200 ramen brands from 15 countries. But shortly after the festival began, ramen fans realized that there were just seven ramen brands available. There are more varieties available in a typical Korean grocery store. Worse, there wasn’t enough hot water. Ramen eaters described their noodles as “lukewarm.” Some food trucks left the venue earlier than expected because they did not receive the promised payments. One attendee wrote, “This is the worst festival I have ever been to.” Strong words. And worst of all, attendees had to pay the admission fee of 10,000 won, which is equal to US$7.
* I’d say everyone certainly got their 7 bucks worth.
* It’s now know as the Lame-o-Palooza festival.
* Hey, what was that Fyre Festival scammer guy doing a couple of weeks ago? This sounds like his handiwork.
* The bands didn’t even show up. Benson Boone didn’t show up for the ramen festival. Shaboozey didn’t show up for the ramen festival. Nickelback? No, they showed up.

TRENDING

MORRIS, THE ALLIGATOR FROM “HAPPY GILMORE”, DEAD AT 80, OR MAYBE 90

Morris the alligator, famous for his role in Adam Sandler’s classic film “Happy Gilmore,” died of ‘old age’ last week at the Colorado Gator Farm where he had retired. The death of the 9-foot long, 640-pound reptile, estimated to be between 80 and 90 years old, was announced by farm operator Jay Young in a video posted to Facebook in which he caressed the deceased Morris’ head. “He started acting strange a week ago. He wasn’t lunging at us and wasn’t taking food,” Mr. Young said, holding back tears. “He had a happy time here, and he died of old age.” Morris will now be taxidermied so he can “scare children for years to come,” according to Mr. Young.

P. DIDDY TRIAL: DAY 2

Sean ‘Diddy’ Combs’ ex-girlfriend Cassie Ventura took the stand on Tuesday to testify against him in his sex-trafficking and racketeering trial.
– Ventura described being psychologically and physically abused by the star since she was as young as 22.
– She told the jury that Diddy would use his assistants and other employees to impose his will. She named several Diddy staff members she claimed would arrange the Freak Offs and punish her by taking her things away, like her car or jewelry, if she displeased him. She also claimed Diddy’s security guard would come find her when she tried to hide from Diddy.
– Cassie said that, for his “Freak-Off sex parties, Diddy preferred Johnson’s baby oil and insisted everyone in the Freak Off had to be ‘glistening.’ “He would say you’re too dry, you need to put more oil on, you need to be glistening, you need to be shining.” Ventura said they could use as many as 10 large-sized bottles of baby oil during the Freak Offs and would apply it as often as every five minutes.
– She testified, “He wanted me to have a nickname for him… he asked me what I called my grandfather and I said PopPop. I thought it was weird and now I feel like it was disrespectful.’

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

May 26, Monday – Memorial Day
June 14, Saturday – Flag Day
June 15, Sunday – Father’s Day
June 20, Friday – Summer begins (The June solstice occurs at 10:42 P.M. EDT)

BIRTHDAYS

Lina Esco (actress, “S.W.A.T.”) … 40
Cate Blanchett (actress) … 56
Danny Wood (singer, New Kids On the Block) … 56
Tim Roth (actor) … 64
David Byrne (singer/songwriter, Talking Heads) … 73
Robert Zemeckis (director, “The Polar Express,” “Forrest Gump,” “Back To The Future”) … 74
George Lucas (U.S. director-producer, “Star Wars”) … 81

Today’s Birthdays grade: Seriously? The guy who created Star Wars? You can just stop there. Easy-peasy. Grade: A-plus.

[Want to try something different with the daily birthdays? Try grading them! Some days have “good” celebs, some have “great” celebs, some have “lousy” celebs. For fun, give the group an arbitrary grade: A-plus through F-minus. Sidekick will give you our take on it; you can to take the concept and run with it.]

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“I was very lucky that we were able to create something that stimulated the imagination of young people.”

(A) The creator of “Barney The Dinosaur”
(B) The creator of “Girls Gone Wild”
(C) George Lucas, the creator of “Star Wars”

ANSWER: (C) George Lucas, the creator of “Star Wars”

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2001 – The Supreme Court ruled that there is no exception in federal law for people to use marijuana to ease their pain from cancer, AIDS or other illnesses.
* No worries. We’ll just legalize it state by state.

1998 – The hit TV series “Seinfeld” aired its final episode after nine years on NBC.
* Nine years of episodes, and every time I catch a rerun, it’s the one with the big painting of Kramer.

1985 – The first ever branch of McDonald’s, based in Illinois, became a museum for fast food.
* They actually have on exhibit a Big Mac that wasn’t soggy and an Apple Pie that didn’t scald someone’s tongue.

1908 – The first passenger airplane flight took place on this date in 1908.
* And on this date in 1909 they got their luggage.

1900 – Women took part in the modern Olympics for the first time.
* Though they had to leave early to get dinner ready.

1878 – Vaseline was patented and trademarked by Robert Chesebrough as the product name for petroleum jelly.
* What? Grape jelly was too “natural” for him?

1851 – Gail Borden applied for a patent on ‘condensed milk.’
* “Just Add Milk.”

1804 – Explorers Lewis & Clark set out from St. Louis for the Pacific Coast.
* Swimmin’ pools … Movie Stars.

1787 – Delegates from the United States gathered in Philadelphia to draw up the U.S. constitution.
* “Finally … a nation free of taxation!”

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2005 – A judge in Springfield, Massachusetts, ordered rapper 50 Cent to stay clean of drugs and take an anger management course to avoid spending time in jail. The rapper appeared in court charged with assaulting three women at a concert in 2004 after leaping into the crowd.

1998 – George Michael was fined approximately $800 after being convicted of a “lewd act” in a Los Angeles lavatory. The Los Angeles court also ordered him to undergo psychological counseling and carry out 80 hours community service.

1998 – It was the end of an era when 82-year-old Frank Sinatra died at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles, following a heart attack. Among his many honors, Sinatra won 11 Grammys and was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom in 1985.

1995 – Michael Jackson appeared on TV with his wife Lisa Marie Presley in a live interview with Diane Sawyer.

1968 – The Beatles announced the formation of Apple Corp. The band declared the production company would be a way for artists to help themselves.

1957 – Elvis Presley was rushed to a hospital after suffering chest pains. He had inhaled a porcelain cap from one of his front teeth and it had become lodged in his lung.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. 70% of women surveyed said if a man doesn’t do THIS on the first date, there won’t be a second date. What is it?
Make her laugh

2. 70% of women surveyed said it’s unforgivable for a man to do THIS on a first date. What is it?
Forget her name

3. 28% of guys ruin a first date by not doing THIS. What is it?
Not opening the car door for their date

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