WEDNESDAY, July 19 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR WEDNESDAY, July 19, 2023
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: A & M AUTOLAND – Tent Sale; THE ONLY MORNING SHOW IN TOWN

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

NATIONAL DAIQUIRI DAY
The National Day Calendar website says this:
“Daiquiri is a family of cocktails whose main ingredients are rum, citrus juice (typically lime) and sugar. American mining engineer, Jennings Cox, who was in Cuba at the time of the Spanish-American War, is credited as the inventor of the Daiquiri. The original drink was served in a tall glass which was packed with cracked ice. One teaspoon of sugar was sprinkled over the ice and then the juice of one or two fresh limes was squeezed over the sugar, followed by two to three ounces of white rum. It was at a later date that the Daiquiri evolved to be shaken in a shaker using the same ingredients, substituting shaved ice. The drink is believed to be named after a beach and an iron mine near Santiago, Cuba that are named Daiquiri. In 1909, Admiral Lucius W. Johnson, a U.S. Navy medical officer, tried Cox’s drink and subsequently introduced it to the Army and Navy Club in Washington, D.C.. The popularity of the Daiquiri then increased over the next few decades. The Daiquiri was one of the favorite drinks of writer Ernest Hemingway and President John F. Kennedy.”

NATIONAL HOT DOG DAY (Third Wednesday in July)

RASPBERRY CAKE DAY

July is:

Adopt a Rescued Rabbit Month
Air Conditioning Appreciation Month
Baked Bean Month
Cell Phone Courtesy Month
Family Reunion Month
International Blondie and Deborah Harry Month
National Anti-Boredom Month
National Blueberries Month
National Grilling Month
National Hot Dog Month
National Ice Cream Month
Melon Month
Wild About Wildlife Month

ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES

AUDIO: THE RETURN OF THE SPONGMONKEYS

Hollywood is on strike, politics are a mess, the climate is going to hell in a handbasket… which is why this is the perfect time for the Quiznos sandwich chain to bring back the Spongmonkeys. (* NOT “Sponge” monkeys, but Spongmonkeys.) If you were alive in 2004, maybe you remember the Quiznos Spongmonkeys – a commercial featuring two frightening looking rodent-like creatures with bug-eyes and bad teeth and malformed rodent bodies – and they sang of their love for Quiznos subs. (Oh just search YouTube already.) The chain is in a comeback mode, and the Spongmonkeys are part of the marketing campaign. (btw, according to someone on the internet, “spong” means “the practice of adding large staring eyes with small pupils to an image,” though we can’t find confirmation of that)
* You’re not hallucinating from the heat, it’s really the Spongmonkeys.
* Is it really any weirder than McDonald’s Grimace milkshake?
* This is the second sub nightmare in a month, counting that Titanic mini-sub accident.
* The dummies don’t even sell plush Spongmonkeys on their website. Idiots.
* Look, as long as Wendy’s never brings back “Where’s the beef?” I’m fine with whatever.
CLIP: The new Quiznos Spongmonkey commercial.
CLIP URL: morningsidekick(dot)(com)/prep/wp-content/uploads/QuiznosSpongmonkeys2023(dot)mp3
CLIP: We produced a wake up song based on this back during the first Spongmonkeys go-round. Maybe you can use it. Maybe not.
CLIP URL: morningsidekick(dot)(com)/prep/wp-content/uploads/SpongmonkeysWakeupSong(dot)mp3

DWAYNE JOHNSON SETS RECORD FOR STARRING IN MOVIE: $50 MILLION

Dwayne Johnson has reportedly pocketed a record amount of money for his new movie “Red One.” Amazon reportedly paid the star actor $50 million upfront for the movie, according to Puck. That’s the highest upfront payment for an actor in Hollywood history. Johnson’s movies have earned more than $13.7 billion globally. “Red One” comes out this Christmas. Plot details have not been made public yet.
* It’s about Dwayne Johnson going to a bank to deposit all that money. The teller asks if he wants a lollipop, and Johnson says, “Red one.”
* You see? Hollywood studios are right – all these whiny actors on strike are earning plenty of money.
* Well, heck. Obviously I should have gone into professional wrestling.
* This must SO annoy Vin Diesel.
* $50 million from Amazon. So get ready for an increase to your “prime” subscription.

THE BUZZ

FIRST BIG PAYCHECK SPLURGE

Did you ever splurge on something after your first big paycheck? Here are some celebrities recalling what they splurged on with their first big payday:
– Timothée Chalamet told GQ he took his first big paycheck from a Disney commercial, and like a true New Yorker, his first splurge was on “nosebleed Knicks season tickets.” He then spent afternoons trying to sell off the tickets after school.
– Selena Gomez bought a “Louis Vuitton laptop bag” with her first big check. She pretended she was a “little businesswoman who needed to carry all her important things,” but really, it held her “lip gloss” and “laptop.”
– Jennifer Aniston bought a little white Mercedes that had a ‘for sale’ sign that she passed by for almost two years. And one day, I bought it, and then I drove it and then drove it again, and it never drove again. It was a lemon, and that’s why it had been sitting there. “So that was just a nice 25-year-old mistake.”
– Sylvester Stallone once had to sell his beloved bullmastiff, Butkus, to an acquaintance for $50. When he sold the first “Rocky” script, he went to see his friend and begged for his dog back, but the friend refused because his kids now loved the dog. Stallone ended up paying the guy $3,000 to get Butkus back.
– Cardi B splurged on a $60,000 Patek Philippe watch because her friends told her, “You a rapper, you gotta shine, you gotta bust it!”
– Stranger Things star Joe Keery says all he wanted was a hot dog. “A Chicago dog. I went back home to Chicago, and I went to The Wieners Circle and got a hot dog. A Chicago dog.”
– John Boyega, with his Star Wars paychecks, bought two lion sculptures that sit on the edges of his bed, a saxophone lamp, a Spartan helmet, and a small metal knight that dispenses toilet paper. “I’m just a big fan of weird things,” he said.
– Emma Watson used her Harry Potter paychecks to get a “sensible” Prius. “It’s not the prettiest car on the road, but it’s good for the environment,” she said. “It’s sensible and boring — like me.”
– Rupert Grint used his Harry Potter money and “went through a phase with loads of animals. I had alpacas, pigs, yeah, it was a whole thing. I think I was 16…” He adds, “It was chaos. Alpacas are insane.”
– Oprah Winfrey said, “The thing that I splurged on was really good towels,”
– Awkwafina treated herself to a “Gucci handbag and Ableton software.”
– Tom Cruise once shared that with his first ever paychecks, he put family first. “I paid for my sister’s college education. And then I bought my other sister a car.”
* Oh, up yours, Tom Cruise.
* And now, all these actors, they’re on strike and out of work. Bet you wish now you’d hung on to that money.
* I work in radio. With my first radio paycheck, I got my dining room table out of hock.
* Dang. Now I really want a hot dog.
* PHONE TOPIC: What did you splurge on with your first big paycheck? Was it worth it?

U.S. NEWS

AIRLINE PASSENGERS PASS OUT IN HEAT WAITING FOR TAKEOFF

In Las Vegas on Monday, passengers aboard a Delta Air Lines flight to Atlanta were waiting to take off in 111-degree heat with no air conditioning when the pilot announced the plane had to return to the gate due to multiple passenger emergencies. According to Fox News field producer Krista Garvin, who was aboard the flight, flight attendants were seen running up and down the aisles with oxygen tanks. Multiple passengers had passed out and some had soiled themselves. Babies screamed as passengers were told to remain seated while they waited for paramedics to board the plane. Garvin said at least five people were seen being wheeled off the plane, one of them a flight attendant. The ordeal lasted about four hours. The flight was moved to 7 a.m. Tuesday. Passengers, however, awoke to find the flight had been canceled again.
* Who could have imagined this kind of trouble at a city on the middle of the desert in the middle of summer? Who?? Who???
* The plane was so hot, you could fry an egg on the wing. Which would have been better than their food.
* “Excuse me, sir – did you soil yourself or is that just the worst cologne ever?”
* I don’t usually like screaming babies on a plane, but I have to admit, this time they had a point.
* Time to bring back the Staycation.

LEAKING HUMAN WASTE CAUSES MULTI-CAR ACCIDENT

There was a multi-vehicle crash on Interstate 95 in Bridgeport, Connecticut, on Monday night, around 11:30, caused by a truck towing a trailer that was leaking human waste onto the highway, causing slick conditions. One of the police reports says fecal matter was scattered across the lanes. (* Let’s pause a moment to picture this. Wow. Pretty gross.) The slick conditions caused one driver to lose control, enter the median and hit a state police car. This caused a chain reaction and the state police car hit another state police car. The 35-year-old driver of the truck was aware of the leak, according to investigators. He was charged with unsecured load, reckless driving and reckless endangerment.
* Unsecured load, indeed.
* As he looked out over the scene, did the driver happen to say “I’m getting to old for this s-word”?
* Was this 11:30 AM or BM?
* A trailer in Connecticut carrying a load of human waste. Is there a shortage in another state somewhere?
* Who’s guano clean that up?

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

GERMAN WOMAN DRAGS CLIMATE ACTIVIST OFF THE ROAD BY HER HAIR

In Recklinghausen, Germany, a woman got tired of climate activists sitting in the middle of the road blocking traffic, a frequent sight in Germany. The woman grabbed an activist by her hair and dragged her to the side of the road. When the girl returned to block the road, the German woman dragged her by the hair a second time. Police said the activist was slightly injured in the altercation. They were all taken into custody.
* What a drag.
* Slightly injured? Her hair extensions came off?
* I think the climate is starting to do that whole ‘awareness’ thing all by itself these days, you know?
* That German woman is one tough cookie. She said, “Next time, it won’t be by the hair on your head.”

TRENDING

TOBY KEITH TO GET SPECIAL PEOPLE’S CHOICE ICON AWARD

Toby Keith is set to receive the People’s Choice Country Awards’ inaugural Country Icon Award. Given in recognition of his decades-long country music career, the award also celebrates Keith’s work as a humanitarian and entrepreneur. The first-ever People’s Choice Country Awards will be hosted by Little Big Town at Nashville’s historic Grand Ole Opry House, and they will air on NBC September 28.

DEATH CARS!

The Insurance Institute for Highway Safety calculates death rates per automobile model every three years. They recently released their list of the vehicles with the highest death rates for the 2020 model year. Here are the Top Ten Vehicles With The Highest Death Rates. If you drive one of these cars, be more careful:
– Mitsubishi Mirage G4: 205 deaths
– Mitsubishi Mirage Hatchback: 183 deaths
– Dodge Challenger: 154 deaths
– Hyundai Accent: 152 deaths
– Chevrolet Spark: 151 deaths
– Kia Rio Sedan: 122 deaths
– Dodge Charger Hemi 2WD: 118 deaths
– Chevy Camaro Convertible: 113 deaths
– Nissan Altima: 113 deaths
– Kia Forte: 111 deaths
Also: As should be obvious, small cars had more fatalities, and large cars had fewer, while larger vehicles tend to kill other drivers at higher rates than their smaller, lighter counterparts. The three vehicles that were the worst at killing other drivers: the Ram 3500, Dodge Charger, and Ford F-350.

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

Sept. 4, Monday – Labor Day
Sept. 11, Monday – Patriot Day
Sept. 23, Saturday – Fall begins (Autumn Equinox is 2:50 a.m. EDT)

BIRTHDAYS

Jared Padalecki (actor, “Walker,” “Supernatural,” “Gilmore Girls”) … 41
Chris Sullivan (actor, “This Is Us”) … 43
Benedict Cumberbatch (actor) … 47
Anthony Edwards (actor, “Designated Survivor,” “ER”) … 61
Brian May (guitarist with Queen) … 76
Bernie Leadon (guitarist with the Eagles) … 76

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“Pull the hair on my head the wrong way, and I would be on my knees begging for mercy. I have very sensitive follicles.”

(A) Donald Trump
(B) William Shatner
(C) Benedict Cumberbatch

ANSWER: (C) Benedict Cumberbatch

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2017 – U.S. scientists calculated the total amount of plastic ever produced – 8.3 billion metric tons, equal to weight of 1 billion elephants.
* Wait – where did they find 1 billion elephants, and how did they weigh them?

1993 – President Clinton announced a compromise allowing homosexuals to serve in the military, but only if they refrained from homosexual activity.
* That’s funny – Bill Clinton insisting that someone else not fool around.

1969 – John Fairfax of Britain became the first person to row across the Atlantic as he arrived in Fort Lauderdale, Florida.
* What the hell, it was better than flying coach.

1961 – The first in-flight movie was shown – on a TWA flight.
* And you got a teeny little impossible-to-open package of six pieces of popcorn.

1958 – NASA, the National Aeronautics and Space Administration, was formed.
* And its budget quickly became astronomical.

1946 – Marilyn Monroe shot her first screen test.
* And that was the last time she showed up on time for filming.

1903 – The first Tour de France was won by Maurice Garin. Recently, there was a glut of drug scandals in the race.
* So, they’re pedaling more than bicycles.

1848 – The first US women’s rights convention was held in Seneca Falls, NY.
* Unfortunately the female organizers were paid half what their male counterparts got.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2017 – “Depacito” by Luis Fonsi ft. Daddy Yankee became the most streamed song so far, played 4.6 billion times.

2017 – A U.S. judge halted an auction of personal items of Madonna, after she said her privacy was violated. Madonna’s underwear, a checkbook, a hairbrush, photos and a break-up letter from the late rapper Tupac Shakur had been among the scheduled lots. The singer said her possessions had been stolen by a former friend.

2010 – Ozzy Osbourne and his former Black Sabbath band mate Tony Iommi settled a long-running legal dispute over the use of the group’s name. Ozzy had filed suit against the guitarist, accusing Iommi of falsely proclaiming to be the sole owner of the Black Sabbath name by lodging an application with the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office. The pair released a joint statement confirming they have settled the dispute “amicably.”

2001 – Wu Tang Clan rapper Old Dirty Bastard, (Russell Jones), was sentenced to spend between two and four years behind bars after being found guilty of drug possession.

1991 – Steven Adler, who used to play drums with Guns’n’Roses, filed a lawsuit against the band claiming that they’d introduced him to hard drugs.

1980 – David Bowie made his theater acting debut in “The Elephant Man.”

1976 – Allman Brother’s roadie Scooter Herring was sentenced to 75 years in prison for providing drugs for the group, based on Gregg Allman’s testimony.

1913 – Billboard magazine published the earliest known “Last Week’s 10 Best Sellers.”

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. The average woman will have just over 100 of THESE in her lifetime. What are they?
Purses

2. A recent survey found most women own about 65 of THESE. What are they?
Beauty products

3. 40% of women surveyed said they do THIS at least four times a month. What is it?
Wear uncomfortable shoes

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