OZZY OSBOURNE SELLING HIS DNA

Ozzy Osbourne is selling his DNA so you can clone him. The 76-year-old rocker has teamed up with Liquid Death iced tea. His DNA will be available on ten limited edition iced tea cans, under the special promotional name “Infinite Ozzy.” The pitch says, “Introducing Infinitely Recyclable Ozzy by Liquid Death. These cans of low-calorie iced tea with B vitamins have each been drunk by Ozzy himself. And each can contains trace DNA from Ozzy’s saliva, as well as his handwritten signature. Now, once technology and federal law permits, you can replicate Ozzy and enjoy him for hundreds of years into the future. There will never be another Ozzy Osbourne, unless you have his actual DNA.” In a promotional trailer shared on their website, Osbourne is seen drinking from the cans before crushing them and placing them in a sealed container.
* Oh, saliva DNA. I was afraid it might be something else.
* With B vitamins? Bat vitamins?
* If you can figure out the sequence of his DNA, then you can figure out what the hell he’s saying when he speaks.
* And with his handwritten signature, you could try forging some checks. This idea just gets better and better.
* I would think if you’re 76, you might not particularly want to drink something called Liquid Death.