MAN LOOKING TO MAKE A RING FROM HIS SPERM

Bark.com, a website that finds people to do particular jobs, received an email from a British man looking for someone to make a ring from his sperm, ahead of a vasectomy he’s having at the end of November. He says it’s a gag Christmas present he has planned for his wife, as well as being a ‘keepsake of his manhood’. He and his wife have been together for more than 20 years, they have five kids (hence the vasectomy) and they like to pull pranks on each other with quirky presents. He says, “The plan is to give the ring to her on Christmas day, wait for her to tell me it’s beautiful, let her wear it for a couple of hours, and then tell her what it’s actually made of.”
* Too bad a guy like this is off the market, huh?
* You’d think sperm would make a better brooch.
* Bark.com? More like BARF.com.
* Next Christmas, her prank should be telling him she’s pregnant again.
* Now here’s some Pearl Jam.