FRIDAY, Apr 14 – DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION

MORNING SIDEKICK DAILY PREP TEXT VERSION FOR FRIDAY, April 14, 2023
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COMEDY MP3s POSTED ON OUR PREP SITE FOR TODAY: THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS

TODAY IS …
(All days repeat annually on today’s date unless otherwise noted; days may or may not be called “National”/”International”/”World” depending on source; sources listed often have additional info. We generally do not list special days which were created by commercial companies for the purpose of marketing, or the hundreds of disease awareness listings which occur each year.)

AIR FORCE RESERVE BIRTHDAY

EX SPOUSE DAY
The Holiday Insights website says this:
“Ex Spouse Day is in recognition of your Ex. Someone must have been kidding when they created this day, right? Could anyone actually want to recognize their Ex? Most of us want to forget them. Hard as it may be to believe, Ex Spouse Day has indeed arrived. Once again, we will remind you that we do not create the days, we merely report them. So, please don’t shoot the messenger. All too often, relationships don’t work out. Life provides us with many ex-girlfriends, and ex-boyfriends. There are many ex-wives and ex-husbands. Most likely, we would prefer to forget them. With a little stretch of the imagination and an open eye, you may find a few ‘Ex’s’ out there who actually have good traits. There are even examples where some people get along better with their Ex after the relationship is over. If you value your Ex in any way, give him or her whatever appreciation and recognition you feel is appropriate today. If you can not find any redeeming trait, no one will fault you for skipping today’s celebrations altogether.”

INTERNATIONAL MOMENT OF LAUGHTER DAY
The Holiday Insights website says this:
“International Moment of Laughter Day is a special day that will put a big smile on your face. The objective of this day is to get people to laugh, and to laugh more often. After all, ‘laughter is the best medicine.’ Moment of Laughter Day is also known as National Moment of Laughter Day, and plain old Moment of Laughter Day. We don’t care whether you celebrate today as a local, national, or international day. What’s important is that you bring about laughter (and happiness) to those you come in contact with today. To celebrate this special day, simply tell jokes or do funny things that cause people to laugh. A smile is not a good enough reaction. Successful participation in this day results in whole-hearted laughter.”

LOOK UP AT THE SKY DAY
The Holiday Insights website says this:
“Look Up at the Sky Day is a fun day to check out what’s up there. Ya never know what might be going on up there. An asteroid or meteor may be on its way. A solar eclipse could be on display. A flock of geese or birds may be over head (you may need to duck for cover). Or, the clouds may be forming into interesting characters and patterns. Take a few minutes out from your busy day to look up at the sky today. If nothing else, the break from the routine will be relaxing. Important Note: If you look up at the sky too long, people are going to think you have nothing better to do. And, maybe you don’t!”

NATIONAL DOLPHIN DAY

NATIONAL GARDENING DAY

NATIONAL PECAN DAY

PATHOLOGISTS ASSISTANT DAY

REACH AS HIGH AS YOU CAN DAY
The Holiday Insights website says this:
“Reach as High as You Can Day is a day to expand your horizons. And, it truly will be an uplifting experience. Today, there are no limits. You can literally reach for the sky. Is there something you’ve wanted to ‘go for,’ and felt it was just out of reach? A new job, perhaps? Maybe a date with that cute co-worker or classmate. Whatever the challenge you face, if you reach as high as you can, you just might win the prize. And, you will never know until you try. So, use Reach as High as You Can Day to reach and attain, or even surpass, your goals and objectives. You’ll be oh, so glad that you did!”

April is:

Car Care Month
Celebrate Diversity Month
D.E.A.R Drop Everything and Read Month
International Guitar Month
Jazz Appreciation Month
Keep America Beautiful Month
National Card and Letter Writing Month
National Garden Month
National Greyhound Adoption Month
National Humor Month
National Poetry Month

ENTERTAINMENT & CELEBRITIES

JEREMY RENNER TO KEEP KILLER SNOWPLOW, POSSIBLY MARRY IT

Jeremy Renner has revealed what he’s going to do with his snowplow, the one that he used to run himself over. Talking with Access Hollywood, the actor revealed that he still loves his snowplow, and when asked what he plans on doing with it, Renner replied, “I love that vehicle and it’s just not going anywhere.”
* That’s the exact same thing he said about it just before it ran him over.
* I think he’s suffering from Stockholm Syndrome.
* Still, when it comes to keeping a positive attitude, he’s crushing it.
* He should at least keep it in the shed until it’s learned its lesson.
* This is the universe telling you it’s time to move to Florida.

THE BUZZ

MORNING RULES

Do you have morning rules in your household? Reddit asked, “What are the morning rules that you have set with your partner that drastically improved the quality of your relationship?” Some of the responses:
– “We always get up early and make breakfast just the two of us before our daughter wakes up. It gives us morning alone time and doesn’t feel rushed”
– “There is no talking before 6am. Has saved us from any number of dumb bickerments.”
– “Waking up in separate beds. We go to sleep together but one of us always ends up in the spare room, and to be honest it’s saved our relationship.”
– “The earlier riser does the morning chores. The later riser does the evening chores. That way the person who gets up earliest doesn’t resent that their wake up time landed them with chores (because they know they’ll have the evening off) and the person who sleeps later can do so guilt-free, knowing they will handle the evening.”
– “Whoever is up last makes the bed ”
– “Not speaking to each other before having the first coffee of a day.”
– “Don’t talk to me. No questions. I love you, but let me get my coffee before you barrage me with questions.”
– “Nothing beats waking up to your partner handing you a cup of coffee moments after you emerge from the bedroom.”
* Pity the house that doesn’t drink coffee. It really defines the morning.
* Some of these people are right on the edge of getting separate houses.
* The rule in my house is always wait until after 8am before you call and explain where you’ve been all night.
* Okay, this makes the morning survivable. Now how about the other 16 hours of the day?
* PHONE TOPIC: What are your morning rules? Do you have an odd routine?

U.S. NEWS

TEACHER/STUDENT WHIPPED CREAM LICKING RACE

A video making the rounds shows some real bad decision-making from some teachers at Desert Hills Middle School in Kennewick, Washington. The viral video shows students and teachers participating in a contest to lick whipped cream from a window. It took place at an assembly just before spring break, so we can assume the teachers wanted to do something fun for the kids. Here’s what they did: Took a pane of glass, squirted whipped cream on both sides of the glass, and the object was to have a teacher on one side and a student on the other side, and both lick the whipped cream off their side of the glass at the same time. Once the video went viral, the school superintendent wrote a letter: “This activity does not reflect the high standards we hold for our staff members as outlined in district policy. The content of a video being shared on social media is highly concerning, and the situation is currently being investigated by the district.”
* Just prepping the kids for high school!
* Now the teachers are gonna take a lickin’.
* It’s not quite as bad as their first idea: A teacher and a student start eating the same hot dog, one on each end, and see who gets more.
* A school teacher has a bad idea for a field day event at 9am. The event occurs at 2pm. How long after the video goes viral will the teacher be fired? Show your work.
* Now the superintendent wants to know how he can get the money from the clicks.

DIMES STOLEN!

In Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, a Walmart truck carrying $750,000 in dimes was robbed in a Walmart parking lot. The truck was loaded with a shipment from the Philadelphia Mint bound for Florida, but the driver left it parked overnight so he could rest before beginning the trip. When he came back Thursday morning, the trailer had been broken into. Dimes were spilled all over the ground. Investigators believe roughly $100,000 in dimes were stolen from the trailer. All told, the thieves stole about 5,000 pounds of dimes.
* The suspects are considered armed and herniated.
* This crime makes no cents.
* They’re going to need 20,000 of those paper tubes to make rolls of dimes worth $5 each.
* You can’t even get a piece of bubble gum from a machine for anything less than a quarter.
* This is gonna make it hard for the Philadelphia Walmart to nickle-and-dime you.
* Time for a review of security procedures. Like they say at the Philadelphia mint: Change is gonna come.

WOMEN REVERSING BRAZILIAN BUTT LIFT

The New York Post reports that more and more women in New York City are choosing reverse their Brazilian butt lifts. The procedure, which cost around $25,000, is a dangerous plastic surgery procedure that sucks fat from other parts of the body and inserts it into a patient’s backside. A 2020 survey by the International Society of Aesthetic Plastic Surgery found that the number of butt lifts performed globally since 2015 had risen by 78%—and that, in 2020, 40,320 butt augmentations were performed. But plastic surgeons say patients are now reportedly vacuuming out the very fat they had cosmetically injected just a few years ago. One Fifth Avenue plastic surgeon, Dr. Ryan Neinstein, said many of his patients are coming in with botched butt lifts from surgeries conducted in South Florida and Colombia.
* Well, I’m glad he got to the bottom of it.
* I imagine the women are tired of always buying new sofa cushions, too.
* $25,000 to enlarge your butt … when you can do it so much cheaper with lots of ice cream.
* Sounds like these Brazilian butt lifts are behind us.
* I haven’t notice this reversal trend yet around here. I go to Walmart and all I see are… well, you know.

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

JAPANESE WAITRESS MIXED BLOOD INTO COCKTAILS, ON REQUEST

A waitress has been fired from a restaurant in Japan after allegedly creating a cocktail with her own blood at the request of a paying customer. The restaurant is Mondaiji Con Cafe Daku, which loosely translates to Problem Child Dark Cafe, in Sapporo. Waitstaff dress in gothic fashion, wearing dark clothes and makeup as part of the gimmick of Mondaiji. The anonymous employee allegedly infused her blood into one of the restaurant’s standard drinks, called orikaku, which is usually made with fruit or syrups. The restaurant management called the server’s actions “job terrorism,” and closed down the business for a day to replace all of the contaminated glasses and dump any potentially tainted bottles of alcohol.
* Again, the PR for this new “Renfield” movie is getting out of hand.
* “Can you put a bit of your own blood in my drink? Oh – and don’t forget the little umbrella.”
* “This drink is delicious, but your hemoglobin is low.”
* What did she give the people who ordered a Bloody Mary?
* She pleaded to keep her job, but it was in vein.
* What do you tip for bloodletting?

TRENDING

LUKE COMBS OPENING NASHVILLE BAR

Luke Combs has revealed that he plans to open his own multi-level Nashville bar and entertainment venue in 2024. The new hotspot will be located at 120 Second Avenue North, the same building currently occupied by popular downtown bar the Wildhorse Saloon. The name of the place hasn’t been announced, but Combs did say that it’s inspired by his debut single and first No. 1 hit, “Hurricane.”

ACM AWARDS 2023 NOMINATIONS

It’s been almost two whole weeks since the last country music award show, so it’s time to announce the nominees for the next one: The Academy of Country Music has announced their nominees for 2023. The show is May 11. Here are the main categories:
ENTERTAINER OF THE YEAR: Jason Aldean, Kane Brown, Luke Combs, Miranda Lambert, Chris Stapleton, Carrie Underwood, Morgan Wallen
FEMALE ARTIST OF THE YEAR: Kelsea Ballerini, Miranda Lambert, Ashley McBryde, Carly Pearce, Lainey Wilson
MALE ARTIST OF THE YEAR: Kane Brown, Luke Combs, Jordan Davis, Chris Stapleton, Morgan Wallen
DUO OF THE YEAR: Brooks & Dunn, Brothers Osborne, Dan + Shay, Maddie & Tae, The War and Treaty
GROUP OF THE YEAR: Lady A, Little Big Town, Midland, Old Dominion, Zac Brown Band
NEW FEMALE ARTIST OF THE YEAR: Priscilla Block, Megan Moroney, Caitlyn Smith, Morgan Wade, Hailey Whitters
NEW MALE ARTIST OF THE YEAR: Zach Bryan, Jackson Dean, Ernest, Dylan Scott, Nate Smith, Bailey Zimmerman

ALBUM OF THE YEAR:
– Ashley McBryde Presents: Lindeville, Ashley McBryde
– Bell Bottom Country, Lainey Wilson
– Growin’ Up, Luke Combs
– Mr. Saturday Night, Jon Pardi
– Palomino, Miranda Lambert

SINGLE OF THE YEAR:
– “Heart Like a Truck,” Lainey Wilson
– “Never Wanted to Be That Girl,” Carly Pearce and Ashley McBryde
– “She Had Me at Heads Carolina,” Cole Swindell
– “Thank God,” Kane Brown with Katelyn Brown
– “‘Til You Can’t,” Cody Johnson

SONG OF THE YEAR
– “Sand In My Boots,” Morgan Wallen
– “She Had Me at Heads Carolina,” Swindell
“‘Til You Can’t,” Cody Johnson
“Wait in the Truck,” Hardy featuring Lainey Wilson
“You Should Probably Leave,” Chris Stapleton

ALMANAC

NOTABLE DATES, UPCOMING U.S. OBSERVANCES

April 18, Tuesday – U.S. Tax Day
May 14, Sunday – Mother’s Day
May 29, Monday – Memorial Day
June 14, Wednesday – Flag Day
June 18, Sunday – Father’s Day
June 21, Wednesday – Summer begins (The June solstice occurs at 10:58 a.m. EDT)

BIRTHDAYS

Sarah Michelle Gellar (actress, “Wolf Pack,” “The Crazy Ones,” “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”) … 46
Rob McElhenney (actor/show creator/writer, “Mythic Quest: Raven’s Banquet,” “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia”) … 46
Adrien Brody (actor, “Poker Face”) … 50
Anthony Michael Hall (actor, “The Goldbergs,” “The Dead Zone”) … 55
Brad Garrett (actor, “The Crazy Ones,” “Everybody Loves Raymond”) … 63
Peter Capaldi (actor, The Thinker in “The Suicide Squad,” The 12th “Dr. Who,” “The Musketeers”) … 65
Pete Rose (former pro baseball player) … 82
Julie Christie (actress) … 83

BIRTHDAY QUOTE QUIZ – Ask your listeners “Who said it?” HINT: Today’s their birthday!

“I don’t smoke, don’t drink much, and go to the gym five times a week. I live a healthy lifestyle and feel great. I can run a marathon, you know.”

(A) Clint Eastwood
(B) Pope Francis
(C) Sarah Michelle Gellar

ANSWER: (C) Sarah Michelle Gellar

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

2012 – J. K. Rowling, author of the Harry Potter novels, launched her website “Pottermore.”
* More like “Pay Me More.”

2002 – Tiger Woods became only the third golfer to win back-to-back Masters titles.
* Hey, I’d be pretty good, too, if it wasn’t for the damn wind.

1974 – The U.S.’s first domestic communications satellite, “Westar One,” was launched.
* It would take almost 20 years before people realized they could make a fortune beaming porn into people’s homes.

1924 – The world’s record for snowfall in 24 hours, 6-feet 4-inches, fell in Silver Lake, Colorado.
* They should be dug out any day now.

1912 – Shortly before midnight, the supposedly unsinkable “RMS Titanic” struck an iceberg. It would sink the next day.
* Should’ve gone with the tropical cruise route.

1865 – U.S. President Abraham Lincoln was shot while at Ford’s Theater watching a play. He died shortly after.
* What was the deal? Ford’s Theater was too stingy to spring for security guards?

1860 – The first Pony Express mail arrived in San Francisco after 11 days and 30 riders.
* Too bad the sacks were filled with mail for Chicago.

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY

2013 – Justin Bieber caused outrage after writing a message in a guestbook at the Anne Frank Museum, which stated he hoped the Holocaust victim would have been a fan. The 19-year-old wrote: “Truly inspiring to be able to come here. Anne was a great girl. Hopefully she would have been a belieber.” It provoked fierce online criticism of the Canadian singer, who was in Amsterdam as part of a tour.

2003 – A man was arrested and accused of making up a Bjork concert then selling tickets. Alex Conate allegedly sold tickets worth $14,000 at $40 each after persuading a San Diego nightclub owner that Bjork had agreed to play there. He was accused of taking the money and moving to Hawaii, where he was arrested.

2002 – Ashanti started a three-week run at No.1 on the U.S. album chart with her self-titled album.

2001 – Sean Puffy Combs was arrested in Miami for riding a scooter in South Beach on a suspended driver’s license. He was released 20 minutes later after signing a promise to appear in court.

1994 – Kurt Cobain was cremated at the Bleitz Funeral Home, Seattle. The death certificate listed Cobain’s occupation as Poet/Musician and his type of business as Punk Rock.

1983 – The Pretenders’ bass player Pete Farndon died from a drug overdose.

1979 – The Doobie Brothers went to No.1 on the U.S. singles chart with “What A Fool Believes,” the group’s second U.S. No.1.

1976 – Eric Faulkner of The Bay City Rollers reportedly came close to death after taking a drug overdose at their manager’s house while in a state of exhaustion.

1976 – Motown Records and Stevie Wonder announced the largest contract renewal to date, worth $13 million.

1975 – After rumors that Jimmy Page, Steve Marriott, Jeff Beck and Chris Spedding would replace Mick Taylor as guitarist in The Rolling Stones, a press release confirmed that Ron Wood would be joining the band for their forthcoming American tour.

X-TREME TRIVIA CHALLENGE

Every installment of X-Treme Trivia Challenge includes three mystery factoids. Create your own “Impossible Question” contest – great for listener giveaways and phone interaction starters! Also a perfect sponsorship opportunity!

1. Close to 70% of us will eat THIS over 50 times in a year. What is it?
A sandwich

2. The average person will eat THIS about 70 times a year. What is it?
A hotdog

3. The average person eats THIS about 98 times a year. What is it?
Cereal

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