DRUNK WOMAN IN A GREASE DUMPSTER

Fort Myers, Florida, police found Anna Marzita Shinkle asleep in the Lani Kai restaurant’s grease dumpster just before 2 a.m. Saturday. According to the police report, she was unresponsive and covered in grease with a shirt on and her pants down around her ankles. The deputy woke her up and told her that the fire department was there to help her. She responded “by stating ‘go [bleep] yourself.'” The fire department attempted to assist the woman, but she held onto the grease dumpster making it extremely difficult to remove her. Deputies warned the woman that if she did not comply she would be tased. Shinkle threatened them again and took an aggressive fighting stance, and the cop tased her. She then complied with officers, was transported to a hospital to have the taser probes removed, and went to jail.
* Anybody else getting hot right now?
* First of all, shame on the Lani Kai restaurant for using so much grease it needs its own dumpster.
* I can’t criticize her. I’m grouchy when I first wake up too.
* Thanks. The story wasn’t quite pathetic enough ’til they mentioned her pants around her ankles.
* She was all greased up and ready for love.
* This is how I always pictured Charlie Sheen’s sex partners.
* I imagine him prowling Hollywood at night, dumpster-diving for women.
* See, this is the kind of thing that would put me on disability as a cop. Dealing with stuff like this.
* And you thought you had a bad weekend.