DOMINO'S ROBBER GETS CASH, PIZZA

The man, believed to weigh at least 350 pounds, robbed a Domino’s pizzeria in Sayville, New York – on Long Island – on Tuesday. The masked large man pulled a gun and ordered employee Ray Brenkert to get on his knees and open the safe. When Brenkert told the robber that the safe is time released and won’t open at will, the robber said, ‘Well, you either open the safe or I’m going to shoot you in the head.” Angry, the robber grabbed a fistful of cash from the register and spotted two pizzas in the oven — large with cheese. He ordered an employee to take them out of the oven, slice them up and box them up for him. Then he took off.
* Correction: the robber weighed 350 at the time of the crime, but that was before he ate the pizzas.
* Police describe the suspect as armed and satiated.
* A time-released safe, huh? Isn’t that Domino’s saying, “Go ahead, threaten our employees – you’re not getting our money”?
* I feel sorry for the people who came in to pick up these two pizzas.
* 350 pounds, so I’m guessing he’ll want the lower bunk in prison.