COUPLE INJURED BY FALLING ANTLERS AT LONGHORN STEAKHOUSE

The host says, “What’s the name?” Tut says, ” “Tutankhamun.” Host says, “How do you spell that?” Tut says, “Hawk, loaf of bread, water ripple, water ripple, wheat stalk, scarab, owl.”

So Judas says to Jesus, “Hey, are you coming to the last supper tonight?”

posted February 23

Jesus says, “The what???” Judas goes, “Uh, the SUPPER… Are you coming to the SUPPER tonight…”

U.S. NEWS

BURGER KING INSTALLS NEW AI SYSTEM FOR EMPLOYEES

You forgot to say thank you [zzzzzap!]

THE TOOTH FAIRY: $5.84

Toothflation.

COUPLE HAS FRYING PAN BATTLE

Too many kooks.

IMPORTANT PRODUCT RECALL: BONER BEARS CHOCOLATE SYRUP

Ask your doctor.

THE MOST POPULAR FACIAL PLASTIC SURGERIES OF 2025

You knows what it is.

AUDIO: SUSPECT HID IN GARBAGE CAN, EXPOSED WHEN TRASH TRUCK CAME

Trash flash leads to rash dash.

WHATABURGER MANAGER USES TRASH CAN TO SUBDUE ABUSIVE CUSTOMER

Would have been funnier if it happened at Smashburger.

INTERNATIONAL NEWS

LASER MOSQUITO KILLER

The Mosquitonator.

LOUVRE DIRECTOR RESIGNS AFTER OCTOBER HEIST

She is louvreing.

PSYCHOLOGY PROFESSOR HAS AN EMOTIONAL SUPPORT CHICKEN

Dumb cluck.

SEAGULL HIT BY SOCCER BALL, PLAYER SAVES THE DAY

The bird was not a dead duck.

BOY FALLS FROM APARTMENT WINDOW, IS CAUGHT BY MAN BELOW

Red scare.

NORWEGIAN CRUISE LINE TIGHTENS DRESS CODE

Ah wahnna ate mah roast bheef in mah gym showurts.

RICHARD III HITS AUDIENCE MEMBER WITH A SWORD

Was ever woman in this humour wooed?

SICILIAN MAN TRAINED HIS DOG TO ILLEGALLY DUMP HIS GARBAGE

Good boy.

FUNNY PICTURES

Right-click on images to
Copy or Save.

Just Put It On My Bill

posted February 27

Cloud Cap

posted February 27

Alien, Hot Dog Version

posted February 26

Muffin, No!

posted February 26

What? / Who?

posted February 25

Living The Dream

posted February 25

THE BUZZ

THE MOST ANNOYING CAR PASSENGER HABITS

Don’t touch the buttons.

BORING CAREERS THAT PAY

Are you looking for a career change? Now you can!

DUMB HEADLINES

These are actual headlines. Have your listeners vote for the dumbest.

THE MOST LYINGEST STATE

Beware Nevada.

HOW OFTEN SHOULD YOU CLEAN YOUR HOME?

You’re not doing it right.

I USED TO JUDGE OTHERS, THEN IT HAPPENED TO ME

Lest you be judged.

I CAN’T DO THIS ONE ADULT SKILL

To be fair, 8 times tables are tough.

OLYMPIC NEWS FOR FRIDAY, FEB 20

Leaf blowers, declined credit cards and drunk reporters!

NEW MOVIES

Click on name for details and audio clips

SCREAM 7

Starts Friday, February 27 in theaters.

EPiC: ELVIS PRESLEY IN CONCERT

Starts Friday, February 27 in theaters.

HOW TO MAKE A KILLING

Starts Friday, February 20 in theaters.

PSYCHO KILLER

Starts Friday, February 20 in theaters.

Click on the title to go to an mp3 player. To download the mp3, right-click on the player and choose the “Save audio as” option.

THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS

For Friday, Fedbruary 27.

BROUGHT TO YOU BY

Funny fake sponsorship announcements

MAIL SNOW

A simple plan.

A & M AUTOLAND – Day Two

It’s Day Two of A&M’s Big Sale starting next week!

THE FRIDAY CLUSTERFLICKS

For Friday, February 20.

OLYMPIC UPDATE #11 – SNOWBOARD CROSS (for 2/20)

For Friday, February 20.

PROMOS-TO-GO

Pre-produced ready-to-use show bumper donuts

OLYMPIC UPDATE #10 – SPEED SKATING (for 2/19)

For Thursday, February 19.

A & M AUTOLAND – Voice Mail

Big Al never quite gets the message.

OLYMPIC CERTIFICATE OF PARTICIPATION

So you didn’t win a medal.

OLYMPIC UPDATE #9 – ICE HOCKEY (for 2/18)

For Wednesday, February 18.

OLYMPIC UPDATE #8 – ATHLETE VILLAGE (for 2/17)

For Tuesday, February 17.

OLYMPIC SPECIMEN CUP

Official sponsor of the Olympic Games.

OLYMPIC UPDATE #7 – FIGURE SKATING (for 2/16)

For Monday, February 16.

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