What did one skyscraper say to the other?
High there.
How long is the average sock?
It’s around a foot.
Guy gets a call from a radio station. DJ says, “Congratulations, you’ve been randomly selected for our radio contest.
All you have to do is answer one question correctly and you win the grand prize! Ready? It’s a math question.”
Guy says, “I have a degree in math, and I teach advanced calculus at the community college.”
DJ say, “Okay, for a backstage pass and two VIP tickets to the Justin Bieber concert… What is 2 + 2?”
Guy says, “Seven.”
What’s a moth’s favorite beer?
Miller Lite.
Two dinosaurs are standing in the rain. They see an ark float by.
One dinosaur says, “Oh, damn, that was today?”
What do you call a flying monk?
An air friar.
A pastor was giving a sermon about living a meaningful life.
He asks three men in the front pew: “What would you want your loved ones to say as they are looking at you in your coffin?”
First man says, “That I was a good father and husband.”
Second man says, “That I lived a good life.”
Third man says, “Look – he’s moving!”
What do you say to the mathematician who invented the zero?
Thanks for nothing.