AUDIO: SCISSORS FOUND IN BIRTHDAY CAKE
In Arlington, Texas, a birthday party was cut short after a family found a pair of scissors buried inside the cake they purchased. Yoly Nava purchased the cake from the El Rancho Market for a surprise party for her mother. The cake cost the family $59.99. A friend spotted the blades just as the crowd began to shout, “mordida” (bite). It’s a tradition in the Latino culture were the person being celebrated usually dives face first into the cake. A manager at the corporate office called Nava to apologize and try to make it up to the family.
* With what? A bag of candy bars with pins in them?
* This wasn’t the surprise they wanted.
* What’s the pinata filled with? Dynamite?
* El Rancho Market? More like El Stabbo Market.
* $59.99? That’s price-gouging, and we almost had face-gouging.
* What a horrible thing to do to cake. Smashing your face in it, I mean, so nobody else gets to eat it.
* “Okay, who wants ice cream instead?”
* Wow, they called off the party? You have to show more of a commitment than that.
* Oh, I get it: “We were so distraught we had to cancel the party.” You know where this is going: emotional damages.
* Nice of the store to apologize but don’t they realize it’s an admission of guilt?
* I think the correct answer would have been: “They can’t be ours. I’m using our scissors right now here at the store.”
CLIP: A bit of the Average White Band’s “Cut the Cake”.
