WOMAN JUMPS OUT OF AIRPLANE ON THE GROUND

A United Airlines passenger was arrested at Houston’s George Bush Intercontinental Airport Monday after bailing out of a plane’s emergency exit. The aircraft, a Boeing 737 from New Orleans, had landed and was on the taxiway waiting for an available gate when the woman jumped out of the exit, according to United. The woman was apprehended and turned over to the FBI. The slide did not deploy.
* Good to know that last fact, United.
* There’s always somebody who has to be first in line at the luggage carousel.
* Delayed Onset Claustrophobia?
* Somebody had gas?
* She didn’t even have a chance to yell “Geronimo!” It was more like, “Geroni—” thud.
* At least she had an exit strategy unlike George W. Bush.
* Now the bad news: the plane had been waiting for an available gate since before Thanksgiving.
* I’m just surprised the rest of the passengers didn’t follow after her.
* Ahh, how sweet. The holiday travel stories are starting to trickle in.