KALE-EATING CONTEST

Coney Island has its hot dog-eating contest. Now, Buffalo, New York, has a kale-eating contest. The Kale Yeah! eating competition will challenge entrants to eat as much kale as possible in eight minutes. The winner will be rewarded with $2,000. Kale Yeah! is taking place at the Taste of Buffalo festival, which will run July 9 – July 10.
* Winner? There are no winners here.
* The winner should get $2,000 and a free teeth cleaning.
* And yet they say Buffalo, New York isn’t a fun town.
* Notice it says “eat as much kale as possible,” not “eat as much kale as they want.”
* By the way, if the exciting and upbeat “Kale Yeah!” name is supposed to make this sound fun, it’s not working.
* Kale is a very healthy food. That’s why it’s not that great.
* Be honest. Call it The Disgusting Kale Chow Down Challenge.
* What worse, eating this much kale or Daenerys Targaryen eating an entire raw horse heart on “Game of Thrones”? Let’s open the phones.
* Careful or some maniac will try to do this with tofu.
* What would a guy who can eat 70 hot dogs do with kale? Eat the whole garden?
* It’s going to be tough finding people reckless enough for an eating contest but still really concerned with their health.