WOMAN FAKES MISCARRIAGE WITH HUSBAND'S CHIHUAHUA

A woman killed her husband’s puppy to fake a miscarriage after pretending to be pregnant for seven months. Johnny Parker returned home to his mobile home in Lawrence County, Alabama, on Wednesday to find his wife Anita covered in blood and body tissue on their bed. Anita, 43, screamed that she’d had a miscarriage and flushed the fetus down the toilet. However, when they got to hospital, doctors took Johnny aside and said tests showed Anita had never been pregnant. When Mr. Parker returned to their trailer his eight-month-old chihuahua was nowhere to be found. Eventually his neighbor found the puppy dead and gutted in the trash can outside. “It hurts like crap, man, about my dog. I loved that dog, man,” Mr. Parker said. He said he never suspected his wife was faking her pregnancy, even though she refused to let him come to her doctor appointments. Mrs. Parker has been charged with first-degree animal cruelty.
* I don’t think “cruelty” quite covers it.
* This couple needs to be immediately airlifted to Dr. Phil.
* This guy lost his wife, potential child and his dog in one fell swoop. Worst country song ever.
* And it doesn’t hurt that the whole thing took place in a trailer.
* Doctors took Johnny aside and said Anita had never been pregnant? At least they didn’t tell him, “Based on the blood DNA, your wife’s been cheating with your chihuahua.”
* How about the neighbor getting a big surprise while going through other people’s trailer park trash?
* “Man, I need to pick through garbage in a better part of town!”
* Let’s have some respect. It’s not every day you run into the grossest story of the century.
* In fact, this might be the grossest story in the history of human beings.
* I dare you to watch “Beverly Hills Chihuahua” after this.
* She still doesn’t get it. Now she’s blaming her actions on postpartum depression.