NORWAY GOLDEN EAGLE ATTACKS FOUR

A golden eagle is being accused of at least four attacks on humans last week in Norway. Among the attacks:
– An older woman was outside last Wednesday when she felt “something big and heavy” land on her shoulders and she went down on her knees. The eagle’s claws went deep into her flesh. Her husband drove it away with a branch.
– Francis Sture, 31, was hiking on a steep Norwegian mountainside Thursday when he suddenly felt like somebody was trying to push him down the mountain. It was a golden eagle. The bird then attacked Sture five more times as he sprinted down the mountain.
– On Saturday, a 20-month old girl was playing outside on a farm when the eagle came “out of the blue” and clawed her. The girl’s mother and a neighbor raced over to fight the eagle, which attacked three times before they hit it with a piece of wood and killed it.
The golden eagle typically eats smaller animals, as well as foxes and sheep. A local eagle expert said what happened is “radically different from normal,” and that the golden eagle “likely had a behavioral disorder.”
* Or, it was just a jerk.
* Maybe if you Norwegians stopped smelling like fish all the time…
* Was anybody in this story wearing a fur hat?
* The majestic golden eagle. Still no match for a guy with a wooden stick. “Audabon THIS, you son of a bitch! Pow!!”
* Then the seagulls attacked.